God Hates Skyscrapers

Did you know that God hates skyscrapers and towers?  After God got really angry at the Tower of Babel, he has been holding back his wrath till the Arabs and others have built tall skyscrapers.  Even worse, some of the residents in these towers have decked their homes out with gold, marbles, beautiful wood, and paintings.

God's greatest end time prophet, Dave Pack, who runs the superfantabulous Restored Church of God has this to say:

You know it’s interesting. You look at the age that we live in, and people today are building these incredible residential towers. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen an interview of Donald Trump on the 55th story of his tower…marbles, gold, silver, tapestries, paintings, beautiful woods…magnificence in a tower. So it’s not a strange concept. You go around the world. New York is now loaded with them, partly because that man wanted to build them. But all over the world now, people…and the devil counterfeits everything…I’m not calling his place devilish, but you know, the Catholics always want high places—always do. The Tower of Babel…They started to build this tower, God knocked it down—said, “You don’t do that. You don’t stick a tower up into Heaven” and sent them away babbling different languages.

And when Christ comes He’s going to destroy all the towers, because there’s going to be one tower. We’re actually going to see He calls it a “tower”—one tower on Earth that sticks way up, and in importance is at the top of all the mountains of the earth. I mean, the ultimate lofty mountain, but now we know has a city on it, and it’s a city that has to accommodate ten thousands of people, ultimately, when it’s in Jerusalem, and they’re all living in mansions that probably, we would assume, look better than the one at the 55th story of Trump Tower or those towers that are all over the world now, where people live, because people want to live up. They’re going back into cities to live higher and have grand views, because everybody…I mean, men understand that. I’m pretty sure God does. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to look out of a 1,500-mile-high city.

So God is not about to have dwellings for three-and-a-half years…condominiums…high rises…that are more beautiful than His. You know it’s been said that Donald Trump is the only man who will ever downsize into the White House. That would be true, and not just physically come down, but just the quality of where he lives is just beyond magnificent. It’s never happened before. He’s worth twenty times George Washington. Almost exactly twenty times George Washington—who was the wealthiest president in our history. So the first president was the wealthiest until probably what will be the last one, who’s worth twenty times more.

But there are people that live in these incredible dwellings. Mega millions and millions of dollars for Penthouse suites. His kids live below him in that tower. Christ is not going to be second fiddle to places like that. I’m not just pointing to him, but there’s been scores and hundreds of thousands of people. Mr. Trump’s son in law, who’s an Orthodox Jew, is thirty-five years old and his net worth is 500 million dollars. At thirty-five…he made it himself. And he lives in an unbelievable place, too, lower in the tower as I understand. So, we are…we’re going to—you’re going to—live in a tower. You’ll be able to flit right out the window, though, and that’s another discussion. You’re going to have…fewer limitations. Let’s just put it that way. 

The One Word Never Before Understood

hy·per·bo·le

noun, Rhetoric.

Obvious and intentional exaggeration.

An extravagant statement or figure of speech not intended to be taken literally, as “to wait an eternity.”.

Revelation 6

12And when I saw the Lamb open the sixth seal, there was a great earthquake, and the sun became black like sackcloth of goat hair, and the whole moon turned blood red, 13and the stars of the sky fell to the earth, like unripe figs dropping from a tree shaken by a great wind.14The sky receded like a scroll being rolled up, and every mountain and island was moved from its place.

One would be quite enough

Revelation 9

15So the four angels who had been prepared for this hour and day and month and year were released to kill a third of mankind. 16And the number of mounted troops was two hundred million; I heard their number. 17Now the horses and riders in my vision looked like this: The riders had breastplates the colors of fire, sapphire, and brimstone. The heads of the horses were like heads of lions, and out of their mouths came fire, smoke, and brimstone.…

I'm assuming you  heard their number wrong and made up the fire and smoke part.

Daniel 7:27 + Matthew 24:31 + Mark 13:27

[27] And the kingdom and dominion, and the greatness of the kingdom UNDER THE WHOLE HEAVEN, shall be given to the people of the saints of the most High, whose kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and all dominions shall serve and obey him. [31] And he shall send his angels with a great sound of a trumpet, and they shall gather together his elect from the four winds, FROM ONE END OF HEAVEN TO THE OTHER. [27] And then shall he send his angels, and shall gather together his elect from the four winds, from the UTTER-MOST PART OF THE EARTH TO THE UTTER-MOST PART OF HEAVEN.

That's quite a streeeeeeetch!

The untrained ministry of the Splits, Splinters and Slivers needs to grasp the word Hyperbole if they are ever to teach the Bible as it was written and meant as a Book for it's time but not for these times.   Dave Pack's sermons would be ever so much shorter if he'd not struggle with trying to make his views both Old and New Testaments literally true. He'd not try to illogically connect a long thin Mt. Zion with his long and thin compound spewing out footage by length and width as if it mattered.  It doesn't.  He'd not bend and twist his mind and thus his sermons around every imagined detail that somehow has to be literally true and "figured out."

If they ever understood the word, Hyperbole they'd all stop weaving tall tales on how it all will be. No one would end up worrying about Petra and what to do with the dog or unconverted children and they'd cease making absolute fools out of themselves boring or scaring their members half to death.  

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COG False Prophets Eating Crow, Once Again. Yummers!

For decades, the Church of God, through Herbert Armstrong, Garner Ted, Rod Meredith, Gerald Waterhouse, Almost-arrested Thiel, James Malm, and others, have been hyperventilating that the United States was suffering from its worst drought ever and would never recover.  Food supplies would soon run out and parents would start eating their children and people fought over food.  Famine would lead to pestilence and death as bible prophecy came alive. Their eyes would almost glaze over in orgasmic delight at such scenarios happening.

As usual, every single one of them has been proven liars once again.  None of us ever need to fear the lairs in charge of various COG's.  Their prophecies lies are constantly failing.

Deuteronomy 18:21-22 ESV / 35 helpful votes
And if you say in your heart, ‘How may we know the word that the Lord has not spoken?’— when a prophet speaks in the name of the Lord, if the word does not come to pass or come true, that is a word that the Lord has not spoken; the prophet has spoken it presumptuously. You need not be afraid of him.

 Almost-arrested Bob Thiel has been claiming that the California drought would destroy the state and it would never recover.  It was a sign of the end times, proving once again that the time is near to flee.  Rod Meredith has done the exact same thing.

Notice this story:

 US drought levels fall to lowest point in years

Just 5 percent of the United States is experiencing drought conditions, the lowest level of drought here since government scientific agencies began updating the U.S. Drought Monitor on a weekly basis in 2000.

Record rain and snowfall over the winter on the West Coast and heavy spring rains in the Midwest have alleviated some of the worst and longest-lasting drought conditions ever recorded.

The word on the street in Arroyo Grande is that all of the butt-hurt salve has been sold out in all of the stores.