Link Updated at end of the article
A special hat tip to the NASA government employee who notified me about this...
Church of God men have to be the weakest sex-crazed men who have ever walked this earth and who cannot control their minds or keep their pants zipped. At least that is the impression a group of "older ladies in the Church of God" seem to claim in a recently released "open letter" to the Churches of God concerning all of the immodest women flaunting themselves at church, at weddings, and the beach at Feast time.
Church of God men have to be the weakest sex-crazed men who have ever walked this earth and who cannot control their minds or keep their pants zipped. At least that is the impression a group of "older ladies in the Church of God" seem to claim in a recently released "open letter" to the Churches of God concerning all of the immodest women flaunting themselves at church, at weddings, and the beach at Feast time.
I am just going to post sections here. The link will be at the end for the entire article. (Photo's mine)
Why Immodesty is a Problem
Written by older ladies in the Church of God
(Please do NOT give this to teenagers younger than 18. Parents should read this and reveal as much as they feel their teens need to know.)
In coed sports, when male players accuse female players of trying to distract them with their skimpy outfits, it’s not usually taken seriously. But did you know that the same sort of feminine distractions are the cause of thousands of car accidents every day?! A study done in August 2022 discovered that, in Britain alone, nearly a million accidents a year are caused by drivers—mostly men— being distracted by attractive pedestrians and billboards! [1]
Given the way most women dress today, it’s highly unlikely that many of the women the drivers said they ‘could not help but look at’ were dressed modestly. And you can be almost certain that the beautiful women on the billboards— which many of the men said they ‘couldn’t tear their eyes away from’—were scantily clothed and posing seductively.
We older women remember how fun it was to turn heads and feel attractive to the opposite sex. Like most other young women, we didn’t understand what turned a guy on and were often surprised that something as innocent as a strap of a sundress falling off our shoulder could do it, or the wind accidentally blowing our skirt up. We now have a far better understanding of how those strange creatures called men, work. Of course, we’ve also included many comments from men as we thought it best to ‘go to the horses’ mouth,’ so to speak!
Acting or dressing in a sexy manner creates lust in men. Modesty, femininity, and
sweetness create a desire in men to care for and protect a woman.
The Western world’s morals are on a severe downward spiral with many music and movie stars taking provocative clothing and seductiveness to a whole new low. It likely makes most young women today feel quite modest in their strapless crop tops and mini-skirts, compared to the many outrageous outfits of so many idolized female pop stars.
But merely dressing less immodestly than pop stars is not what a godly woman should be striving for! As quoted by Tomorrow’s World magazine from an article in the magazine, Good Housekeeping, “Surviving Britney Spears”:
Parading through videos in cropped-tops and bikinis, she has incredible appeal to girls as young as eight or nine. Young teenagers are increasingly immersed in an erotic world. The results are quite evident…many, barely into their teens, look and act like prostitutes![11]
Do you really want your teen to be mistaken for a prostitute? But do you know what you are saying by the clothes you’re wearing!? Here is some wise advice that sums up the Biblical principle of modesty: ‘Wear clothes tight enough to show you’re a woman and loose enough to show you’re a lady.’
The same principle applies to any outfit that shows cleavage, is too short, or shows any part of your body that is meant to be kept private. A godly woman does not show off her body in any way. (If you’re not sure whether something is provocative, ask someone you trust—like your parents, a brother, or husband)
This excerpt from the same World Tomorrow magazine should help make it clear:
Skirts that are too short and tight, plunging necklines, high slits and other similar styles are designed to send a sexually seductive message to men. While many young women would deny this is their intention and say that it is just the style, their parents need to help them grasp that, regardless of their motive for doing so, they are projecting an image that is seductive and sexually arousing to men.[11]
A little further down:
Women must understand that most men will be attracted to and look at sexy women—even if they are happily married.
But, as strong as their sex drive is, the majority still value true love, a lasting relationship, and a family, above all else. And women who dress as sex objects are usually not taken seriously, whereas the modest, girl-next-door type are looked up to and valued. For a woman to mix sweet and innocent with sexy and alluring, confuses men, to say the least. Always dress for the type of woman you are!
One of the biggest mistakes women make with men is believing that when a man desires them sexually it means he likes and cares for them. The old saying is true: Women give sex to get love and men give ‘love’ to get sex. Of course, men are not giving love when they are ‘in lust’—they are only doing and saying whatever will get a woman to have sex with them!
Lust causes men to objectify and use women and even despise them because it is focused solely on satisfying the self. This is exactly what happened between Amnon and Tamar. (2 Sam 13) And it’s why ungodly men can have sex with any number of women with no feelings or concern for them whatsoever.
Job said, "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman.” (Job 31:1 NIV)And Christ said, “Whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matt 5:28)
There is no such command for women! So don’t blame men because their thoughts can so often turn to sex, or because they are much more easily aroused—it’s the way God made them! And, whether a woman shows sexy body parts purposely or accidentally, makes no difference in how it can affect men. It is up to you to wear clothes that don’t even accidentally show off your body! As one long-time minister said,
“I really appreciate it when a woman keeps her top from gaping open as she bends over, to prevent me seeing something that might tempt me to sin.”
All women need to understand that, to a man, a woman acting or looking ‘sexy’ is offering herself to every man around.
So, he assumes it’s just a matter of which man she’ll choose to satisfy her—and him—sexually.
“Dear Girls, Dressing immodestly is like rolling around in manure.
Yes, you’ll get attention, but mostly from pigs!”
Sincerely, Real Men
Too many women know firsthand how aggressive and persistent men can be when they are crazy for sex. The severe emotional and bodily injury that can occur in rape are so disastrous that most women can never get past it. However, while a woman should never attempt to arouse sexual desire in a man other than her husband, she is never responsible for rape or abuse no matter how she acts or dresses! But if you aren’t offering sex, don’t send wrong messages by dressing or acting in a sexy manner!
And don’t think a man’s need for sexual release is somehow shameful—God made men that way! However, He does not condone men fulfilling their needs with any woman except his wife! The Bible addresses this need in marriage quite clearly:
“Do not deprive each other of sexual relations unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” (I Cor 7:5 NLT)
Most women can go weeks, months, and even years without the need for any kind of sex. Men aren’t made that way!
That’s why there are far more men indulging in pornography, strip shows, and sex for hire, than women. But it is not the desire that is evil, it is the way either men or women seek to fulfill that desire. It is meant to be shared in marriage only and wives who deprive their husbands of sex are causing their husbands to be tempted to find sex elsewhere and damaging their marriage big time. Just as food is not much of a temptation when your stomach is full, so a man who is satisfied sexually will be far less likely to be tempted than one who is deprived.
But Women Need to Control Their Wrong Desires too!
If you protest that men should just control themselves, you’re absolutely right! But it isn’t just men that are guilty of lust!
While some few women may be sex-driven, most women just want attention, admiration and affection. This is why so many women ‘compete’ with other women, resorting to immodest clothing as a common strategy. And, even when they know they’re getting the wrong kind of attention, or are even happily married, it’s why many women still want to dress in a provocative manner!
Lust for attention can be as addictive as a drug—and yes, it is lust if a woman’s desire to be admired leads her in wrong ways—like showing off her body or behaving immorally! That is Satan’s way, it is sinful, and it does not lead to any kind of lasting happiness. God tells us plainly: “A person who commits sexual immorality sins against their own body.” (I Cor 6:18)
A great many women flaunt their bodies shamelessly and not only don’t care if men are affected but do it on purpose to tease, get attention, manipulate men, or feed their vanity. This must not be a godly woman’s attitude. Hopefully this article is helping you understand how a man’s mind works so you will make better choices in your clothes—all of them!
Another single man put it this way: “The one place where I might think not to have to face temptation is at church. But this is not always the case! When ladies that I'm friends with dress immodestly, it definitely has a negative effect on our friendship. When she dresses immodestly, it doesn't make it easy to see her as a sister in Christ. There is a constant battle going on as I'm talking with her. Communication becomes more difficult because as I'm trying to listen to her, I am also trying to fight temptation. I also think some ladies just aren't aware.” [5]
Here is what one young man said: “…if I could say anything to the women in the church, it would be this: first, there is not a man I know that doesn't struggle in some way with lust. If they had any idea what went through guys' minds, it would probably vastly change the way they dress. Secondly, and I think most importantly, God has created his church to be a resting place for Christians, to be a place where people encounter God without all the distractions… It is disappointing when I walk into the church or an event with the church and have to deal with the same temptations that I face in the world, but I rejoice whenever I see a girl or woman that is attempting to serve the Lord (and guys) by dressing modestly.
You have no idea how sweet and challenging it is when I see a woman who has decided not to flaunt her body— like the culture shouts for her to do—but rather she has decided that serving the Lord and her brothers is more important.”
Further down:
From a minister in the United Church of God: “Virtually every man between the ages of 12 and 112 who has a normal set of male hormones responds to any female immodesty, overt sensuality or suggestiveness! The response may be lust and sexual arousal…But he may have another negative response, such as embarrassment, a compulsive curiosity to see more or annoyance at the distraction. If the man is trying to obey God, he may lament or resent the visual temptation that has provoked a mental battle within him. A man often has mixed feelings, being turned on and turned off at the same time.” [12]
Continuing:
This comment was from a college-age man: “The thing that women do not seem to fully grasp is that the temptation towards lust does not stop for us as men. It is continual. It is aggressive. It does all it can to lead men down to death. They [women] have a choice to help or deter its goal. Consider this message my appeal on behalf of the men for you to help us deter the goal of lust in our lives. To the girls who are ignorant, please serve your brother, and have your dad screen your wardrobe. Ask him how you can better choose holiness over worldliness. To the girls who don't follow the pattern of the world, thank you a million times over! You are following Scripture's commands and helping your brothers in the process.” [5]
Continuing further down:
One Church of God minister summed it up in a sermon: “The fellows who have a proper mind-set—who want to be Christians in every way—very much want to get to know the ladies around them. But if they are approached by a lady who is dressed so provocatively that every moment he’s with her he’s got to guard his thoughts about the obvious way she’s coming across—as a sexual object—he can’t think about her personality; he can’t think about a conversation he might have with her. He’s too busy—as a Christian—trying to block out all those things that are slapping him in the face wanting to get his attention in the wrong way.”
“One of our young men said in a sermonette that he had gone to a warm-weather Feast site and the ladies in the Church were wearing bikinis. Now I would submit to you—in a public setting—how would a bikini ever be proper?! A Church setting at the Feast of Tabernacles and OUR ladies in OUR Church are wearing bikinis!? How is that ever justifiable?! And the people this man was talking about were not teenagers. They were in their twenties and past, so this is not just for our teens.” [2]
Look at this excerpt from a church bulletin: “Dear sisters, On behalf of and for the benefit of men who are seeking to live in accordance with the will of God and to keep themselves pure and holy, to the end that you not encourage them to lust, and for your own eternal welfare, please do not call undue attention to yourself or expose yourself by wearing immodest apparel. Godly men do not want to see your thighs—or more—in clothing that is too short, your cleavage in tops that are too low, your navels in tops that are too short, your undergarments in clothing that is too thin, nor the curves and characteristics of your bodies in clothing that is too tight. Please look in the mirror at yourself—front and back—and ask yourself if your attire is becoming one professing godliness. You may need to make some changes. A brother in Christ” [2]
Further down the article, after telling women what they should wear, there is this:
Strive to look Sweet rather than Saucy; Feminine rather than Foxy;
Classy rather than Sassy!
Having to fight ungodly impulses may cause many men to just stay away from women who dress or act in any manner that compromises their walk with God, including any such women in Church. And a man who is looking for a wife will likely feel some aversion to a woman who is willing to show off her body for all other men. Men are not as shallow as some women think, especially men who are striving to be godly! They greatly prize a woman who keeps her body hidden in respect for herself and others.
Some older men even feel obliged to turn down requests to speak to the teens in their congregation because the young girls dress so provocatively! Parents need to make sure their teenage daughters are taught how to dress and act modestly and—as long as they are living at home—that the parent’s rules are followed! A minister should never have to correct teenagers on this point. That is the parents’ job! (No one said raising children was easy!) Remember your children are also holy, so see that they dress as becomes holy people! (I Cor 7:14)
It is highly unlikely that any woman would become sexually aroused simply by how a man dresses! But, as the young men in the survey above confirmed, virtually every one of them said they would be tempted to lust if a woman is dressed immodestly!
And please remember that when you come before God in a worship service, your clothing should be especially modest and not distracting! If a woman is going to be on a stage—such as for special music—her skirt will appear several inches shorter because the audience is looking up at her. And do you really think a woman who is dressed immodestly should be teaching our children, playing for hymns, providing special music, signing for the deaf, or any other such service in church?
Another perspective is from a minister in Church of the Great God: “I cannot help wondering where the husbands in the church are when their wives come to Sabbath services with thin tops and bras, leaving nothing to the imagination of the other men in the congregation. Ladies, if you do not have a husband attending with you, or you are single, please check your clothing by looking in a mirror before you come. Is your blouse too tight and gaping open? When you sit down, are you well covered? Whatever you see in that mirror, we see! Do you fathers monitor your teenagers' clothing?” [14]
Besides sitting in front of a mirror, lean over to see what is revealed if your blouse gapes open. Look at yourself from the back and sides. Your bottom and thighs should not be visible through your clothing, nor should they be outlined by tight clothing. If they are, your clothes are immodest.
There is a lot more in the article. Find it here: Why Immodesty Is A Problem
