"Why Do You Bother? Forget About It!
It is not uncommon for someone to tell me "Why do you bother with the past? Forget about it." I'd sometimes wonder that myself and know many who seem to be long gone from the WCG experience and yet still stuck or spinning within it. We keep up with the splinters and the antics of their ministers. We, or at least I, listen to their sermons, not for edification, but to confirm that I am happy not to be a part of such foolishness. I shake my head and chuckle when one such as David Pack, Apostle of the Restored Church of God, uses so many personal pronouns in sermons and begins many with "I don't think I ever given a sermon quit like the one you are going to hear today." That would be a major hint to me it is all being made up as we go.
Nothing is more humorous than listening to one of the very two true witnesses of Revelation get angry over people who throw paper on the floor or say the word "amazing" about a zillion times in every sermon usually in wonder at how stupid everyone else besides he and the 12 people in the room are.
From "That Prophet" to "And yes brethren, I am an Apostle," I find it all rather fascinating now that I don't have soak in it or lay awake at night wondering what else is going to happen to shatter my idealistic belief that it once was to me the True Church of God and I had been called by the Deity to be both member and minister. I really believed that and I think there in lies the key to the ongoing fascination.
Those who are the most sincere, in my experience, suffer the most when they learn their sincere seeking was misplaced. It accounts for our anger, sarcasm, keeping up and ongoing interest in that which proved to be less than encouraging. I think we subconsciously or very consciously wish to be some kind of vehicle for helping others through the process and coming out better and not worse for the whole experience.
Sadly, some literally ended their lives due to the instability all the upheaval produced in the place they sought solace and safety for their own mind and spirit. I know several ministers who died either deliberately or through the abuse of alcohol so often used to mask the pain, perhaps not realizing just how much it would actually magnify it. I started down that path for a time out of the pain of separation from that which I loved and at times to mask the pain over the loss of those I love, but got off that train. For every moment of "forgetting" there were a thousand of depressing recall that just made matters worse. It is a treadmill one needs to pay very close attention to and just say no to.
There is more truth than the truth we know. The God many think they know is not all the God there is. It is the glory of a King to search out a matter, not just accept the ideas of others. All these things are true. And while it is incomprehensible for most Bible readers to grasp, there is more truth in life to explore than whatever truth is perceived to be contained in the pages of the Bible. The Bible is not inerrant, was not written literally by any literal Deity, is not the "best book ever written," and does not tell us where we either really came from nor why exclusively.
In the Churches of God, neither splinter nor sliver, their pious conviction coupled with their marginal information, training and education is not enough to qualify to tell everyone else what the Deity wants, demands, requires or thinks about us all.
A few things I have come to know now that I wish someone had taught me back then when thinking I was "called" to be a minister.
Genesis 1-11 are purely mythological stories, mostly borrowed from Sumerian myths and given a Hebrew spin.
"Moses" did not write the Pentateuch but rather is a compilation of different authors mostly Priests during the Captivity of the 5th century BC.
There is no evidence that the dramatic events of the Exodus ever literally happened in history and that most of the OT is designed to give an insignificant cultic people an amazing pedigree.
Characters such as Abraham, Moses, David and Solomon may or may not have literally existed in history.
Clearly, God "evolves" from a polytheistic Deity to a monotheistic one over a very long time and the people of Israel held on to many gods throughout history. The Canaanite God "EL" of Genesis was talking to his Council of the gods, when he is quoted as saying "Let US make man in OUR image..." He was not talking to a future incarnation of himself called Jesus. When God said, "you shall not bring any other gods into my presence (what the words in Exodus really say,) He wasn't saying there were no other gods. He was saying don't bring them around me as I am a jealous God. I don't like their competition. Clearly, polytheisim was the norm.
Concerning the NT, I wish I had understood that Paul's writings preceded the Gospels which is why he never quotes an earthly Jesus, tells of his life, healings, teachings, miracles or birth circumstances. Those tales had not yet been written in his lifetime. Paul's Jesus was cosmic and hallucinatory and not any real Jesus he ever knew or met. I also have doubts about just how much the Jewish Church under James felt Paul was anything but a charlatan. Luke's rendition of Paul's life and calling is not the one Paul himself speaks of in his real writings. Not all the books attributed to Paul were actually written by Paul.
The Gospel accounts are not coherent or harmonious.
Jesus birth narratives in Matthew and Luke are two different stories
Mark never heard the birth stories of Jesus nor did John and Paul said he was merely born of a woman.
The resurrection accounts are muddled and contradictory in major ways. They can't all be right and are not four different ways of describing a car wreck.
The Book of Revelation is a failed prophecy written just prior to the fall of Jerusalem under the Romans. It is not a book for today and its expectations of the Kingdom of God to route the Romans failed.
The story of Jesus is the same story as Mithras and Osiris and is astrotheological in nature. All Sun Gods are born on the Winter Solstice and all take away the sins and darkness of the world which they overcome at Easter in the Spring.
Christian apologetics get down right silly at times
Life is short....and lots more stuff like that.
So why bother keeping up? Because it's fascinating and I have always loved the study of origins. From where humans really come from (common hominid ancestors) to the origins of mythologies and ideas that spring from them, its all amazing. I want to know what may be worth believing and what may be just plain silly or even harmful. Much of what religion, not true spirituality, teaches or demands sucks the soul out people and is harmful in the long run. Religion keeps you the same yesterday, today and forever. There can be no progress when you know it all. It is no coincidence the Dark Ages arose when the Church did.
I may regret my WCG experience but I can't undo it. Next time around...if, I want to be a Paleontologist. You can't unring a bell. So I may as well use it to learn from. And perhaps if I can help just one person step out of the box and take a bigger look around, it will be worth it. It is for me a challenge and fascination though the price of this education has been and will continue to be high.
To not accept what is, is insane. To not use the experience to help others grow through is a wasted experience.
Namaste....
