Wednesday, March 14, 2018

Does the Church of God Need ANOTHER Booklet on Dating?

As has been normal for the Church of God, it has always felt the need to control every aspect of its members lives, from what they eat, what kind of clothes they wear, and what kind of sex they have and how often.  From birth to grave the church has made a business of meddling in members lives.

Last week, the Church of God's most perfect end-time leader (sorry Dave Pack, it's not you) announced he is writing a new booklet on dating.  Dreamy Bob Thiel is its author.  The weird part about this booklet is that with 2,996 of his members living in Africa, WHY would THEY care about American dating habits?

Almost arrested, but not arrested Bob Thiel says this:
Let me start off by explaining about the forthcoming dating booklet.

Originally, we planned to put out a book about the canon of the Bible this year. However, I realized that with my schedule and the research required for this subject (I had started on it last year), this would not happen in 2018. After praying about subjects to cover, I concluded that we could–and should–get out a booklet on dating. And I have been working on that. This is a subject quite different than others that our booklets, sermons, and magazines have covered.
Many aspects of Christian living should be part of what we need to teach (cf. Matthew 28:19-20), and while they have been, many aspects of dating were basically missing.
Furthermore, as we have scattered unmarried people in many places, and I did not want them to feel left out or without additional guidance from us. I have long prayed for our singles, widows, and divorcees (and yes, I pray for married people too). Soon, we expect to have a dating booklet that may help some of them. And hopefully, this will help others not with the Continuing Church of God as well.
So God revealed to him to write a booklet on dating, just like he revealed to Elijah Thiel he needed to start a new church?  We all know that one was a lie, so why should we believe God told him to write a booklet on dating?  Even worse, you will notice that he is also writing another booklet about the canon of the Bible.  Does ANYONE care?  Tens of thousands of books have been written on the canon since the Jews started compiling their own books in specific order between 200 BC - 200 AD.  The only thing Amos Thiel is attempting to do is rewrite church history to make it more in line with Church of God myths, particularly his myths. But, that is for another story.

The self-appointed prophet Thiel is going to present this new booklet in an awe-inspiring new way on the Internet.  He is going to have ANIMATED videos!  I can see Dave Pack whimpering behind his security gate right now at this most momentous announcement!

Announcing a New Door: Animations 
In order to help get information out to a wider audience, we have decided to produce some short animations that we plan to initially put up on YouTube.
This may be somewhat unique to us as I personally have never been part of a church that used a lot of animations (I only remember a two-minute animation in the 1970s used once as part of a World Tomorrow telecast related to Gehenna fire). The first CCOG animation is intended to be related to dating and our forthcoming booklet on the subject. 
Currently, I have written two or three scripts for the animations, and am working on one or two others. Some will mainly promote booklets we already have, but we also will need additional ones. 
Now, because of this animation door, this seems to be the time to produce some other booklets on subjects I had in mind to write (God’s existence, Christian living, God’s calling as Ambassadors for Kingdom of God, baptism, prophecy, etc.). So, I plan to work on at least a couple of those before going back to the book about the canon of the Bible.
The Internet will have a field day when he starts posting these.  then watch, he will start screaming PERSECUTION when they are mocked.

Apostate Thiel is taking this animation route because Apostle Paul told him to!  It's all there in the Bible.  Apparently, Apostle Paul was a visionary man who knew the Internet was coming down the pipeline in the future.
We are striving to implement ways to better reach the audience in the 21st century. That is consistent with the following teachings from Jesus and the Apostle Paul:
12 Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. (Matthew 7:12, NKJV throughout, unless otherwise noted)
19 For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win the more; 20 and to the Jews I became as a Jew, that I might win Jews; to those who are under the law, as under the law, that I might win those who are under the law; 21 to those who are without law, as without law (not being without law toward God, but under law toward Christ), that I might win those who are without law; 22 to the weak I became as weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some. (1 Corinthians 9:19-22)
Apostate Thiel believes that the youth of the world will be highly attracted to his videos:
To try to reach all, we must also consider their demographics. Younger people are looking for more short bursts of information, and people are more used to being entertained.
There is a place for ‘milk’ as well as ‘strong meat’:
12 For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the first principles of the oracles of God; and you have come to need milk and not solid food. 13 For everyone who partakes only of milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, for he is a babe. 14 But solid food belongs to those who are of full age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil. (Hebrews 5:12-14)
Apostate Thiel is aiming these dating videos to the 13-30-year-old crowd.  As if some 20-30 year old is going to pay attention to any of his crap!   Apparently, this will be a huge witnessing tool in Africa.
So, while we will continue to have sermons, long articles, etc. (stronger meat), we are looking to provide some basic information (milk, starter food) in forms that more would be comfortable to start with. Plus, everyone who has been around for a long times does not always need strong meat. God made a variety of physical foods, and in CCOG we are trying to provide a variety of spiritual foods (magazines, websites, sermonette videos, sermon videos, personal contacts, visits around the world, baptizing trips, youth camps, church and holy day services, radio appearances, and now also videos). Radio appearances, of which I have done over 100 since CCOG formed, should be considered mainly along the “milk of the word” line.
Consistent with biblical admonitions, we need to “Memorize his laws and tell them to your children over and over again” (Deuteronomy 6:6-7, CEV) as well as “turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers” (Malachi 4:6).
Since very young children tend to have their hearts turned towards their parents and vice versa, I have long believed we need to, in addition to teaching parents (which is something we have always striven to do), better reach young people in their teens and above. Animations look to be one way to do that (and yes, church youth camps, which we have each year are also another specific step we have taken).
But let it be understood that while the use of animations is mainly focused on people from age 13 to 30, animations should also be effective for people of almost all ages. 
Apostate Thiel believes that these animated videos have the potential to start the persecution of his improperly named "continuing" Church of God.  YouTube may pull them for being too controversial. PERSECUTION I SAY! PERSECUTION!

The use of animations looks to be a door that we can use to reach others that we may not otherwise reach as well as those not as likely to want to read long articles and/or to watch long sermons. Hopefully, after watching animations, many will want to learn more.
The use of online television services like YouTube, and modern computer software to make animations, is a NEW DOOR IN TELEVISION.
My hope and prayer is that the short animations, combined with relevant free book offers, will help others develop more interest in true Christianity. This is another way to get the witness out to the world.
We plan to announce each of the animations shortly after they come available.
We also are expecting to make some of them available in other languages.
Now, as far as YouTube goes, yes we are aware that they censor and may one day block our content–it suspended a CCOG sermon by Steve Dupuie once and has blocked non-CCOG people (see YouTube censorship of ‘conservative’ content). However, since more and more people can watch YouTube on televisions in their homes, it is still the least expensive way to reach a broad television audience. Unless something better comes along, we plan to utilize the ‘door’ of YouTube until it closes. Which, one day, it will.
Until then, putting animations online, in addition to our sermons and sermonettes, on YouTube is an exciting development that I ask all of you to pray about. We hope to have the first one finished and available within weeks.
There is nothing new under the sun because it has already been done!


Anonymous said...

I've been reading about African culture, and it's very different to western culture. In many ways, they are still in the stone age. Which is why many aid programs end up failing. Bobs out of his depth trying to deal with that continent.

Byker Bob said...

I can just see it all now! The characters in the animations will all be wildly flailing their hands as they speak, items in the background might include hideous curtains from Target, or things that are drawn crooked, and wierd farting noises will somehow inexplicably contaminate the sound track.

To reach young people, you’ve got to be cool and capable of relating to them. This is why many contemporary Christian churches have youth pastors. I predict that this new dating booklet will not be making any best seller lists. HWA has already been plagiarized by all the other splinters. There will be nothing new and different here.

As for the canon booklet? Thiel is going to have a difficult time topping Gavin.


Stanley Tweedle said...

The books/booklets on dating that these Armstrong cults come out with are so asinine & arbitrary.

Anonymous said...

We don't need any more irony when it comes to the "Churches" of "God" but let me mention that in spite of all the "good words" about the "proper" way to do everything, there were so many guys out there, in the hell of Armstrongite gatherings of the unmarried, who were convinced they could find someone who would actually begin to talk about marrying them after a short acquaintance, like a couple of dates during that stupid fall gathering we were forced to go to each year.

Turned out he really wasn't interested in what I was like, or liked to do in my spare time, or whether I had any opinions, or had anything interesting to say. He just wanted to get in my panties, or anyone's, a.s.a.p.

As someone I know said, pointing between their legs, "All they want is a place to put this!" And to do it before we "became spirits" and couldn't "do it" anymore.

Shove your dating advice -- that goes for all of you out there who still think old Herbert was something besides the greedy, deceiving pig we now know he was.

Anonymous said...

What does Bwana Bob teach about interracial dating?
What does he teach about marrying only within his church?

If he retains WCG's preference for marrying within the church, young people in CCOG will have severely limited options. On the other hand, if he rejects HWA's teachings about interracial marriage every American single in his church will have several hundred potential mates in Africa.

Anonymous said...

Dr. Thiel - This is all well an good, but until you make a college, how can you be taken seriously as the primary Work of God on this earth? God's prophet Samuel had a school for prophets, but nothing from you. And with the failure of LU, this would seem like a huge door God is opening for you. Also, I had a dream last week where you were lecturing to a packed class.

DennisCDiehl said...

Let's see....Something about the Biblical Canon or.......yeah that's it! Dating!!!!

Anonymous said...

Jordan Peterson has a bunch of videos that tell you more about the other gender than you will learn in any COG, from it's narrow-minded former members, or any pick-up book.

Anonymous said...

"I've been reading about African culture, and it's very different to western culture."

To even call what they have "culture" is stretching it. Before white people met them, they were all naked and illiterate.

Anonymous said...

"To reach young people, you’ve got to be cool and capable of relating to them."

That's retarded. What you need to do is be great. Then they look up to you. Why crawl in the dirt like an ignorant biker who think's he cool at 70?

Byker Bob said...

I’ve become convinced that like the Amish, but to a slightly different extent, Armstrongites and their teachers live in a completely different, and alternative world. Working with a broad cross section of the human ecology system every day, the world that I experience is totally different from the world as Armstrongites perceive it.

So, in a sense, a handbook to assist people from this alternative existence in their dating experiences might not be as inappropriate or laughable as some of us tend to think. It’s just that the reason it seems so absurd is that traditionally these churches taught that a good member must date and marry within “God’s True Church”, and the shrunken exclusivist splinters, particularly a micro splinter such as Bob Thiel’s, offer statistically negligible opportunities for dating, so there would be little opportunity to hone dating skills through regular experience. Therefore, a dating booklet in that context would be just as useful as a how to book on handling elephant encounters on the streets of Manhattan. His membership would be much better served by a booklet on how to live a celebate lifestyle and be happy. Not that ACOG ministers are anything like Paul, but Paul used his epistles to address and resolve prevailing problems in his churches. Celebacy and limited opportunities to date and marry are much more imminent and real problems facing ACOG members today than questions and challenges related to dating.

Some of the extreme crackpot leaders in the Armstrong movement have even forbidden pregnancy because “we’re just too close to the end.” And yet, considering the catastrophic financial demands, it would be very difficult to imagine members of the ACOGs having enough disposable income for birth control. Traditionally, sexual activity has provided much needed relief for people being repressed by assorted circumstances in their lifestyles. There are many, many closed and locked doors which needlessly confront the practitioners of Armstrongism.

Dating booklets are just one more acoutrement that a splinter group must have in order to appear to be authentic Armstrongites. Helpful perhaps in the days of 50-150,000 members, but pretty darned useless when 50-500 members attend your Feast of Tabernacles. It’s that old time and date stamp thingie again!


Anonymous said...

Jordan Peterson makes no effort to be cool, but young people are flocking to him in droves. His videos are going viral. He's a one-man wrecking ball, demolishing lies of all kinds.

Connie Schmidt said...

Will it include rules and "canon" for internet dating, which is how many people are doing it now?

For the COGs , they need their own dating website. It could be called... ! ;-)

Anonymous said...

So if they make an animation on dating, what's next? The Missing Dimension in Sex? That ought to be good, I wonder what would be included, scenes from the Kamasutra?

Hoss said...

And Banned previously posted a sample Bob Thiel animation.

Bob's Dating booklet will likely be the first of its kind to be published in a myriad of African dialects. As already commented, it may lead to some problems in cultures where arranged marriages are the norm.

Anonymous said...

@ Hoss,

Good point! Bwana Bob can reveal to us God's mind on such important questions as:

• Must I tithe on dowry payments that are received?
• Can I deduct dowry payments from my tithable income?
• Is female circumcision (common in some African tribes) unacceptable, optional, or preferable?
• Does Christ require men to have just one wife, or can Christians follow the many Old Testament examples of polygamy?
• Does the New Testament magnify the Old Testament rules so wives can choose to have multiple husbands?
• Concubines. The God of the Old Testament permitted them for kings. Christians are training to be kings. Therefore... ?

I understand that the child-captives of Boko Haram already practice "group dating" which Armstrongism has long encouraged. For many African families, however, HWA's suggestion to "date widely" before marriage will probably get somebody injured or killed.

James said...

I want a booklet on the dangers of masturbation!

Byker Bob said...

Do you have any sources at all that are not hard right? I mean balanced and thinking individuals who realize the value of compromise, and wouldn’t necessarily be interested in or involved in starting the next Civil War?


Anonymous said...

James wrote: "I want a booklet on the dangers of masturbation!"

Never happen. Every one of the COG leaders masturbates, even Dr Bob.

Hoss said...

Anon 101 wrote Every one of the COG leaders masturbates, even Dr Bob.

So they should have no trouble writing a book about it.

Anonymous said...

That is a lie. Why posters here want to lie and make things up is absurd.

Lake of Fire Church of God said...

I have posted this before, and I will post it again. I am confused by Dr. Almost arrested doubly blessed Elijah Prophet Bobby Thiel's dual role and conflict of interest of being both the Grand Poobah head of a Church and also being a Prophet. Did the Prophets of the Old Testament both run Church organizations and write animations on dating?

How does re-writing and animating the old WCG booklet on dating help further Dr. Thiel's work as a Prophet even though Herbert Armstrong said there are no Prophets in the modern end-time Church age? If we are truly at the end of times, why date at all? I'm confused, and I think Dr. Almost Arrested doubly blessed Elijah Prophet Bobby Thiel is also confused too with his conflicted roles.

Are you a Prophet Bob, or are you a Pastor General?


Anonymous said...

Oh! Looks like the Dr. did like the comment above.

Anonymous said...

The Dr might need to read this

It is a Sabbatarian site. All Sabbatarian things are true!

Anonymous said...

Okay, the COG was a cult, but why bash EVERYTHING they ever said? It's immature. If everyone dated the church of god way we would not have a nation of disease-ridden sluts of both genders. How sad. Are you all degenerates?

Anonymous said...

The more partners you have had, the harder it is to form a permanent bond. Are high divorce rates worth it? Married people have more and better sex than singles. You people are the product of the morally bankrupt zeitgeist.

Anonymous said...

4:51 AM:

The bad guys you are complaining about were never converted and ended up on this web site. So, is that the fault of the church?

Anonymous said...

Do you have any sources at all that are not hard right?

Who is hard right? Jordan Peterson? Are you nuts? Some reporter called him that and he threaten to sue them. Anyone not a radical leftist is called a Nazi these days. It's an old ploy. They can't defeat the arguments so they defame, slander, misrepresent, and censor. Nobody with half a clue takes lefties seriously anymore.

Retired Prof said...

This is all interesting in an abstract way, but it comes far too late to help me. First of all, after going on fifty years now, it looks as if I am irrevocably married. And even if my wife did belatedly wise up and divorce me and send me out on my own, the only dating that would be relevant to me would be the radiocarbon kind.

Byker Bob said...

No, a common ploy is that demagogues deliberately misidentify themselves, so they can do more damage.

I’d never heard of Jordan Peterson before you nominared him for sainthood. But, so far as attracting gobs of young people goes, Bernie Sanders was the one who scared me to death! The country was going to eat it bigtime no matter who we elected this cycle.

The patriot act didn’t kill off the militia movement. And the election has unfortunately made it mainstream. Sad times we live in, but I am sure the sun will emerge from behind the clouds some day soon.


Still Learning said...

Retired Prof, your sense of humor is delightful!

nck said...

"The more partners you have had, the harder it is to form a permanent bond."

I don't know if there is any evidence for this.

Over 6000 years of history has shown that the more economically independent one is the more likely one is to have multiple partners therefore having less of a permanent bond.

The affluent have since babylon in majority not sticked to one partner and kept "regulated orderly" life styles for the "middle classes."

Only in certain time periods when empires rise matrimony and celibacy is enforced. The British Empire saw more brothels than pubs and clubs for the affluent. The rising roman empire was frugal. The rising American Empire was "fundamentalist".

It is more about social control and economic independence.

The Soviets seemed to have had the best sex ever during the Soviet empire, since there was little else to do.
Impending death helps too as many little european - american/canadian liberator kids testify.

The ukrainian partizan groups in the bellorussian forrest seemed to have required all women to be married to a man to enforce peace in the relationship field while fighting the occupiers. So periods of stress and dependence strengthen bonds while peace and affluence seems to lessen it. Multiple partners. I don't know. Even Roderick Meredith in his councelling said that 90% of men and women could be yoked together.

Which I believe is true under certain circumstance.

Man is the only primate that is pretty helpless for years. Therefore requiring man and woman to work together to ensure their DNA's immortality (or economic future in some cases)
Morality is a means and system for women to find a man that just might fit the requirements of a longer time cooperation. And perhaps they might even love each other still after the hormones settle. If that happens the president or the queen sends a letter after a while, congratulating people on that feat, since THAT is very special.


Byker Bob said...

If there were truth in advertising, all of the ACOGs would be writing booklets and articles on how Armstrongism was dated! Oh, wait a minute! The Tkaches already tried that, and it went over like a lead balloon!


Anonymous said...

We need a booklet on
What kind of clothes to wear
What to eat
How to cook what we eat
What car to drive and how fast we can go
Where we should live and what kind of house or apartment
How many children we should have
Should there be interracial dating and marriage
Should we save for retirement
That should keep Bitter Bob busy for awhile

Hoss said...

Banned as seen at!

We are not accusers of the brethren, we are only trying to troubleshoot problems related to those who appoint themselves as leaders of the Mythical True Church.