The Kitchen family has once again proven beyond any shadow of a doubt that they are exactly like every other slithering COG snake slithering through the weeds of Armstrongism. Shocker of the century, right? This entire circus isn't about shepherding the flock, feeding the spiritually hungry, or humbly serving the brethren in any meaningful way or even buying an auditorium. No, no—it's all about money, cold hard cash, the almighty dollar (or check, preferably made out directly to one specific person).
Samuel Kitchen, that paragon of third-generation "true church" purity, is now dusting off the book of Haggai like it's the hottest new money-making playbook straight from the divine accounting department. Members are apparently supposed to obediently drag every last tithe, offering, spare dime, and probably their kitchen sinks too, straight to "God's storehouse"—which, in a plot twist no one saw coming (except literally everyone who's been paying attention), has miraculously relocated to the rolling cornfields of Iowa. Because nothing screams "divinely appointed headquarters" like a quiet Midwestern town far from the prying eyes of... well, anyone asking inconvenient questions.
All those endless COG splinter groups—each one birthed in a blaze of "God's government" drama and righteous indignation—were never genuinely about caring for the brethren, correcting wrongs, or restoring some pristine "truth once delivered." It was always a glorified vacuum cleaner operation: suck up as much third-tithe money, festival tithe of the tithe money, first tithe, building fund "love offerings," emergency excess second-tithe scraps, and whatever loose change falls out of grandma's purse, all so the self-appointed leaders could keep their lifestyles comfortably insulated from the harsh realities of, you know, actual work or accountability. Private jets? Lavish homes? College campuses? Auditoriums? "Modest" ministerial perks that would make a televangelist blush.
And let's be crystal clear: Samuel wasn't exactly standing on a mountaintop begging the brethren to send their hard-earned tithes directly to the Almighty in some ethereal spiritual transaction. Oh heavens no—that would be far too... biblical. Instead, he's politely (or not-so-politely) requesting that those checks be cut straight to him, personally, Samuel W. Kitchen, resident prophet-administrator-CEO of the One True Storehouse in Keosauqua or Coralville or wherever the divine GPS is pointing this week. Why? So he can buy another glittering monument to pomposity—because truly, what better way to demonstrate Christ-like humility and "poor in spirit" vibes than by owning the personal shrine to his earthly god (Herbert Armstrong), bankrolled entirely by the gullible faithful who still believe the "work" needs their widow's mite to limp along?
Nothing says "God's true servant" quite like turning Malachi 3 into a personal building fund.
Truly inspiring stuff. If only the original apostles had thought to incorporate and reroute all donations to their own names—think of the cathedrals we could have had by now.
God says that whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all of your might.
And when God says to do something, why can’t we do it? If God gives us something why not obtain it and hold it?
Do we fear God or not?
This won’t be achieved by power or might BUT BY THE HOLY SPIRIT OF GOD.
But I am fully confident in the Word of God, who says do it! Work! God says! For I am with you!So let us WORK towards this goal, to give glory to the name of God, and to unite in one cause, and as one people, one church. Why do men love it when the enemies trash what God gives? Now when we can restore it, why hesitate? Why let Satan hinder us?All I ask is for the people of God to obey God and to bring what is HIS to his storehouse. And when Haggai talks about the seed in the barn, that is like the ark and the 8 people. Noah and his family were commanded to build “an ark” a physical ark, something for the mind and hands to do in service of the Lord our God. Everyone laughed but they didn’t laugh when God moved ahead with His plans.Let us go to God in prayer and fasting. Let us obey God. Let us not neglect our job as members of the spiritual temple.
14 comments:
Samuel's Fairfield, Iowa mailing address may be another clue as to the scope of his delusion. Fairfield is the U.S. headquarters of the Transcendental Meditation movement, and has two large "Golden Domes" where TMers go to meditate in groups. Sam works in the shadow of a worldwide cult that has not one but TWO big golden auditoriums for the faithful. He's not just ambitious, he's jealous.
The big question, is can Sam put new butts in the seats? If not, he is simply yet another parasite! Providing another outlet for tithes through claims to be the real restorer of Armstrongism. Well, it all reminds me of the old song, "Third Rate Romance, Low Rent Rendez Vous"
The audacity and presumption here can be instructive. I hope some are not taken in. Add the charisma of Armstrong and you can see how these hucksters separate fools and sincere people from their money.
How many times are the members of the ACOGs going to be expected to pay for Ambassador Auditorium?
It makes you wonder how the money and the fools got together in the first place! Richard
š¤£š¤£ no one will be taken in. Samuel is barely literate, has zero rizz, and sounds like Corky from Life Goes On. He has maybe 2 or 3 followers. This kid doesn’t stand a chance and you can blame his insane parents and the COG movement. It’s sad actually.
What's the frequency, Samuel? What is the frequency?
Now there's an idea! Meditation is often recommended as a very beneficial adjunct to treatments for bipolar/manic-depressive disorders. All Samuel would need to do is trade an Apostle for a Maharishi.
Sam cannot prove that he represents God or that he wont run away with the money.
Its Shocking that, "THAT PROPHET/ The Great End Time Elijah/ The Grand Wizzard of the PCG Flurry has not tried to purchase this sink hole yet. That would be like the HOLY GRAIL to him. I guess with his declining health he may not want it. You would think that with little Stevie on the rise this would be an opportunity to add to his book RAISING THE RUINS, and the need to some how intermingle it with bible prophecy. Here is their Opportunity to restore all things.
Flurry probably learned a thing or two from Edstone and the jet.
On the other hand, Sam is probably laughing his ass off at the huge reaction he's receiving here. Not even the most highly skilled of regular participants here can garner such outrage!
And Sam remember, when you go to those Golden domes, you say, Oom, Omm, not Our Father.
Sam Kitchen is certainly getting a lot of publicity lately on this blog. He probably loves all the attention, but will anyone donate to him?
Flurry is content with the Plan B bldg. built out of red clay OK brick on "14400" S. Bryant Rd.
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