Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Feast of Tabernacles 2015: Head Coverings Required for Women While Men Don't Have to Wear Ties

Are you ready to attend the most perfect Feast of Tabernacles ever?  Are you ready to stop wearing your tie and for ladies to cover their hair?  Can you imagine bringing into a hotel your own food cooked in a hotel room because you don't want to make the hotel cook for you - even though they are already working to set your room up and clean up after you?

If so, then get ready to attend the Feast of Tabernacles with the Church of God's greatest Pharisee James Malm and a few of his acolytes.  Women are expected to cover their heads when entering the meeting room they are gathering in.  Since neckties are not mentioned in the Bible the lucky men don't have to wear ties if they don't want to .

Can you imagine what a week of hell this will be for any kids in attendance!

2015 Feast of Tabernacles 
We have booked meeting space at the Medford Oregon Convention Center, from evening Sep 29 through the evening of Oct 7, for the 2015 Feast of Tabernacles and the Feast of The Eighth Day.   

I would strongly advise attendees to arrive a day before to avoid any travel complications, and to have ample time to make preparations for the High Day. 

The Convention Centre has a swimming pool and work out room, and offers a breakfast included.  New this year, a Denny’s is also in the building.  There are also numerous good restaurants in Medford. 

The Centre is only about 150 feet from a large grocery store, similar to Wal-Mart which itself is only a few blocks away.  Rooms in the Centre are no smoking and have cable TV and small fridge’s. 

The meeting space is set up classroom style with tables and they will permit us to bring in food and drink for our Sabbath and High Days communal potluck meals.

Youths 17 and under stay free with parent. 
Our Feast will be very heavy on the spiritual. (Translated: the LAW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  No Jesus and grace but TONS of LAW!!!!!!!!!!

Ladies will be expected to cover their glorious hair during services as per the biblical command.  1 Cor 11: Covering the Hair in Prayer  There is NOTHING in the Bible about wearing ties; so that will be optional.


Byker Bob said...

What, motels and hotels instead of sukkoths? No travel to Jerusalem? No animal sacrifices? Skip all of this big stuff, but be sure to make the women wear head coverings, because they've got to know their places! Good thing they are not in South America or Australia, as the harvest with which this is interrelated for portrayal purposes is 6 months out of phase.

I wonder if any other ACOG groups believe that God has placed His name on Medford!

Also, they'd better study Canaanite history and customs to investigate how the pagans celebrated their harvest festival, just to be on the safe side!


Black Ops Mikey said...

This guy can't even read the Bible right: The covering for women is the hair -- women are not to be 'shorn'.

There's not much hope to learn anything at the Feast of Tabernacles when the 'minister' can't even understand the physical nature of Scripture.

It's a shame for men to have long hair: Nature teaches us that because, well, suppose a guy is out doing heavy construction work and gets his long hair caught in the machinery and is seriously injured or dies as a result. What a shame that would be. Just because he had long hair.

Say, doesn't that argument work for being clean shaven without a beard?

I Corinthians 11 also means that if women are bald (like from chemotherapy) they should wear a wig.

Bring a rope. False prophets are to be put to death, if you want to get nit-picky about Olde Testament Christianity (that's the Law of Moses plus mentioning Christ in order to enforce the Law of Moses). Of course, since the Old Testament Scripture isn't specific as to how to kill a false prophet, I would suppose a shotgun would work just as well. Darn those Scriptures: Some are specific about the penalty like stoning or burning, but some leave it to your imagination.

Look -- if you want to employ some of the Law of Moses, you have to take it all -- no cheating by claiming Jesus did some of it away. Where would you draw the line, anyway? Animal sacrifices are out, but the Feasts (requiring the animal sacrifices to be kept properly -- and where are you going to get the priest, altar and tabernacle, huh?) are in? How does that work?

Kill off the false prophets first and we'll sort the rest out later.

Anonymous said...

Will bald ladies be expected to cover the glorious hair of their underarms?

No!No! ?
Yes!Yes! ?

Anonymous said...

What I love about strict law-based religion is that it's like you spend your whole life being watched and recorded to see if you lived up to an ambiguous set of writings that are open to an incredible amount of interpretation. And then, at the end, after it's too late to find out if you guessed right or not, since there's no feedback whatsoever, not even to reassure you that you're mixed up in the right law-based religion, and then, after it's too late to make any course corrections, THAT'S when you finally get some feedback? Nice. Thanks a lot.

Given that there are so many "counterfeit" religions and sects (100.0% of them if you ask me) any omniscient god would have to know that by throwing people into a people-grinder like this, he's guaranteed to have to dispose of all but a handful. Nice. Thanks a lot.

If you ask an Armstrongist why he thinks christianity is the right religion, among other things, he's probably going to point to the success of christianity. But if you ask him why those billions of adherents are all still missing the boat anyway, and only a dwindling few thousand of them are on the "saved" list, he'll probably point to the scripture about how "narrow is the way and few there are who find it." But which is it? Is the road wide or narrow? If the sentiment of that scripture were valid, shouldn't we expect "the truth" to be found in a tiny sect of a tiny religion, instead of a tiny sect of the largest religion on earth?

But why would a good god allow the "bad guy" to make his "road" so wide, while agreeing to make his own "road" so narrow, unless he knew from the start he wasn't going to want most of us anyway?

I guess creating is kind of a numbers game. Every so often god gets lucky and makes an "Abraham." The rest of the time his luck comes up shit and he gets losers. That's how you know you're not that great of a creator.

Black Ops Mikey said...

Rumor has it that David Malm will be available to men having problems for marriage counselling.

Connie Schmidt said...

Malm is such a legalistic weird freak that Im sure that he will be legislating on the use of "Tampons" as fornication, adultery and uncleanness issues soon.

Chuckles said...

Who is David Malm??

old EXPCG hag said...

Women covering their heads. Your kidding me. Think I'll sneak into his Feast without my head covering and crash the party! Think I'll wear a rainbow Bozo wig on top of that. Wouldn't that be hilarious? Where exactly is this place, I need to start planning!

Anonymous said...

Black Ops: you have to remember that Malm Disney think he was the problem in the failure of his marriage. It was her fault, just like women are always at fault.

Byker Bob said...

Their problem is that they fail to acknowledge evolution as one of the processes of the universe, the propensity of nearly everything to continually churn and change. They want a religion based on a totally static condition, no innovations, no growth in understanding, just an attempt to learn to perfection how people from an alleged "golden era" of the past conducted themselves! Their millennium was even depicted as being a return to an agrarian lifestyle, with arranged marriages, and people once again wearing robes and sandals!

The fact that there are multiple covenants put into play throughout Biblical times demonstrates that while God's personality and character do not change, there is flexibility within that basic structure for much else to change. James Malm is a pillar of salt!


Anonymous said...

And also don't forget, when you're building your sukkah, to make sure you build it out of the four species. God will not hold him guiltless who forgets to build his sukkah out of the right materials.


A motel room? You're going to hell for sure.



The Torah instructs us to take up four species in hand to celebrate Sukkoth. On the first day you shall take the product of the goodly trees, branches of palm trees, boughs of leafy trees, and willows of the brook, and you shall rejoice before the Lord your God seven days. [Leviticus 23:40]

The first three (willow, palm, and myrtle) are bound together and collectively called a lulav. The fourth is the etrog (citron), a sweet smelling citrus fruit grown in Israel. It is held with the lulav and brought both to the synagogue where it is waved as Hallel is recited. The lulav and etrog are also waved in the sukkah. Ancient Israel was first and foremost an agricultural society and the laws, customs, and rituals described in the Torah reflect this. The four species symbolize the agricultural abundance of and God's role in nourishing Israel.

Together, the four species are shaken in six directions during Hallel, signifying that God is found everywhere. It is considered a mitzvah to acquire the most beautiful lulav and etrog available in order to honor the holy day.

Why four species? Why not three or five? While I cannot provide an academic answer to this question, there are many wonderful drashot (homiletical explanations) for the number four.

Anonymous said...

The COG's do not keep the feast of tab. the way that god commands in scripture. They also don't keep the sacrificial laws.

The truth is it is all about control and money.

For eight day members are indoctrinated in armstrongism and are told to give large amounts in the form of offerings to the org.

I used to feel sorry for those still insnaired in armstrongism but now after all this time if they don't see this for what it is," a big scam " they are just being stupid.