This has been making it's rounds lately about the idiots that we have elected to political positions around the country.
A DC 'airport agent' offers some samples of "WHY" our country is in trouble!
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn’t get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a Kansas Congressman’s (Moore) staffer (Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Cape Town. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then he interrupted me with, ”I’m not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts ..”
Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained, ”Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Cape Town is in South Africa .”
His response — click..
3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that’s not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.
He replied, ‘Don’t lie to me!, I looked on the map, and Florida is a very THIN state!!” (OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker’s wife (Landra Reid) who asked, ”Is it possible to see England from Canada ?”
I said, ”No.”
She said, ”But they look so close on the map” (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas .. I pulled up the reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas … When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, ”I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time.” (Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.
I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn’t understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, ”Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?” I said, ‘No, why do you ask?’
He replied, ”Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I’m overweight. I think that’s very rude!”
After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT – Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage..
8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, ”Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii ?”
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby Bright from Ala who asked, ”How do I know which plane to get on?”
I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, ”I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.”
10 Senator Claire McCaskill called and said, ”I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?”
I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola and fly on a commuter plane.
She said, ”Yeah, whatever, I told everyone on Tweeter I was going there, so now I have to go and you have to get me there!”
11 Mary Landrieu, La. Senator, called and had a question about the documents she needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa. “Oh, no I don’t. I’ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those.”
I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa. When I told her this she said, ”Look, I’ve been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!”
12 A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make reservations, ”I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .”
I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, ”Are you sure that’s the name of the town?”
‘Yes, what flights do you have?” replied the man.
After some searching, I came back with, ”I’m sorry, sir, I’ve looked up every airport code in the country and can’t find a rhino anywhere.”
”The man retorted, ”Oh, don’t be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!”
So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, ”You don’t mean Buffalo , do you?”
The reply? ”Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.”
Now you know why the Government is in the shape it’s in!
7 comments:
Cute. But total fiction.
it is a mystery to me why all of you people wait until a man dies to tell all of this junk about them.if all of this is a lie you should be prosecuted for slander.
I am tired of former members of Gods church who enjoyed living by Gods commandments,statutes and laws turn around and spout evil murmerings about the church that taught them the true ways of God .Yes we did have to leave Worldwide to follow the truth.Every one of you heard the same man that I did and none of us would have known the truth if God hadn't used that man to call all of us.Mr. Armstrong said many times that maybe half of you even get it and now I do see why he said that.....shame on all of you....
This is to all of you ministers out there who have decided that you dont believe all of the doctrines that were restored to the church through Mr. Armstrong why did you pretend to follow the churches teachings and even taught Gods people those doctrines knowing at the time that you didn't believe them yourself? Was it for the wonderful benefits you enjoyed at the time?Were you really ever converted? Just because you may have attended Ambassadore college doesn't mean that God called you to teach his people,that is a dangerous position to be in before God.
Herbert Armstrong was an heretic who rebelled against the Church of God Seventh Day.
How many are you going to prosecute?
You surely follow an impotent little god who was incapable of taking care of his church and people for 1,900 years and had to wait for Herb to come along and find 'god' because of a nightmare his wife had.
Regarding Chrucho f God Seventh Day: From The Truth Shall Make You Free:
Yet Armstrong felt no guilt about operating for years as the (pg 122) Radio Church of God prior to the Worldwide Church of God, after he himself withdrew from the Oregon Conference of the Church of God. While he continues to deny having been part of the Church of God Seventh Day at Salem, West Virginia, the Church has in its file the following document containing Herbert Armstrong’s signature: “I am anxious to begin on the ministry which has fallen to me by lot, in the one body, and am determined by the help of the Lord to live and teach the commandments of God and the faith of Jesus Christ as found in Holy Scriptures, and as outlined in the Constitution of the Church of God, with world headquarters at Jerusalem, Palestine. Will you please record this my acceptance, and have credentials issued to me, according to my ministry in the body.”
It is interesting note that not only did Herbert Armstrong receive his credentials as a minster of that organization, but he acknowledged that organization as being “the Body,” meaning the Body of Christ or the true Church. How, then, could he later form another organization and claim it was the true Church? Does that mean that other predecessor organizations ceased to be so, even though they remain in existence? As God’s apostle, does he have the authority over these other organizations? One could run in circles trying to figure out the logic of Herbert Armstrong. But in his own mind the while matter is clear, for he states, “God does not have two churches – only ONE Church that Jesus Christ founded in A.D. 31 and raised up to carry on in OUR time though His own chosen apostle.” If that statement is true, then Herbert Armstrong must have been ordained into the ministry of a false church, in which case his ordination is fraudulent and not only is he not an apostle, but he is not even a minister in the Church of God.
The most incredible aspect of all of this, however, was that Herbert Armstrong’s propaganda was very effective. The Church members, for the most part, believed even more fervently that the Worldwide Church of God was the only true Church, that Herbert Armstrong was God’s Apostle, and that to go against the Church or Herbert Armstrong was to go against God Himself.
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