Friday, January 27, 2012

Dennis On: "It's Just A Story...Remember-Repeat-React-Resist






It's Just a Story...


Remember-Repeat-React-Resist is Not the Way

Dennis Diehl - EzineArticles Expert AuthorThe experiences in all our lives is just a story.  With a little change here or there, a look, a wave a mistake or an event outside of our control, every story changes.  

When I was 14 I wanted to go see my sister in Idaho.  I was in NY.  Shortly after getting the airline ticket, the airlines went on strike.  Guess that idea was on hold and school started soon.  Then I saw a train and wondered if I could take a train.  So I did.  It was there at 14 I found them reading the Plain Truth.  Being weird and curious I devoured everything they had.  I went to church with them. I heard a good sermon for a change...and the rest is part of my story in life.  Had I not taken that train, the story would have been different for years to come.

I postponed a flight once just for a day and didn't die on Big Bear Mountain in Duarte, California

 
I waved at somone once across a parking lot and the story swerved and changed.
I got several times where that story would play a part in more stories years later
I made a phone call or two in life that changed the whole story again.

While that story unfolded, the stories of others unfolded around me and those stories began to affect my story.  Various people came and went in and out of my story and the story kept turning into another one and not the original story I had envisioned for myself.  Finally the stories of others pretty much ruined my original story and a dramatically new story, yet just another story, came into my life to play out.  That story changed too into yet another and another and another. 

Everyone has a story to tell and yet one of the real skills in life is not to identify too much with the ever changing story  of one's life.  If it was not one story, it would have been another complete and replete with different characters, experiences, offspring, relationships, drama and outcomes.  Yet in it all, it is still just a story.  

Eventually, if we are lucky and live long enough to accumulate stories, we begin to look back and remember, repeat, react and resist the stories that were burned much more deeply into our memories and self more than others.  These are stories that leave deep impressions on us, have hurt us deeply or put us in situations where we had to come up with yet another story to fix or at least learn to accept the consequences of the last story.  Yet again, it is all just another story.

I don't believe we here have to speak in code.  The WCG story, which for whatever reasons, we allowed into our lives and become a major player in our own personal life story , has left some pretty big scars, lessons and , if we are not present in the moment of our current life story, can easily put us all back into the ever looping cycle of remember, repeat, react and resist.  What we resist persists as far as I can tell.   
In other words, we get stuck. 

Personally, and in the context of my own story, I am not confident of what may be really true and what is not.  Well meaning friends or readers sometimes will try to explain it to me or sometimes we all endeavor to explain it to  each other, but I don't ever see myself or others finding much encouragement in the stories and conclusions of others in their stories.  I'm thinking we each have our own unique story, experiences and such to learn our own life lessons.  It is why we find so little success in using our own stories to influence the story of others.  It's certainly why we see little "success" in bringing one sitting in their own story to "their senses" and filter their lives through the opinions, views, truths and discoveries of our own stories.  Simply put, it is why few change much from their own story to ours, yours or mine.  

I have noted that one of the reasons, if not the main reason, people of all kinds of faiths and beliefs don't easily give them up is that they/we adopt our beliefs to protect us from the fear we have of death.  All religion is born out of this fear and conscious awareness that we only seem to have that we will go through the cycle, no exceptions, of "Not here---Now here---No longer here" whether we like it or not.  The Apostle Paul, in his-story, for a time thought that others would die in the faith, but of course, WE who will be alive shall be changed.  Bzzzzzzzzz..thanks for playing Paul, but you got that wrong didn't you.  

Ministers give sermons every week and tell stories.  Ministers are story tellers and because of our story, we get to have access to some pretty amazing stories that are spun and woven every week called sermons in the COGs.  Ron Weinland spins a tale, as if he really knew, and draws people into his story.  Dave Pack has a story to tell as does Gerald Flurry, Rod Meredith, Joe Tkach Jr and hundreds of others, all competing to include others and even sometimes each others audiences in their story.  The real trick is to tell a story so compelling or in such a way as to seem to be the "True Story of the True Church," that others drop their current story, include them in yet another story of their lives and give up their resources to perpetuate the story.  All this is designed to alleviate the fear of death and , of course, to give meaning to all the previous stories no matter how crazy they were.  

Most of us here have dropped out of the previous story and gone on to create new ones.  In many ways, the old story infects our new one.  It keeps coming up and I imagine most of us think about it in some form or another every day. And of course, doing so, pushes our own new story this way and that affecting our present lives.  We remember, repeat, react and resist a bit and get a bit screwed up, if just for a moment, in our present moments.  

But no matter the story each human being finds themselves acting out, all stories tend to teach us the same lessons.  It seems not to matter how we learn but that we learn the real truths of life that will serve us well and give us peace.  Because when it is all said and done, all I ever wanted to have and teach was peace, kindness, compassion and the kind of love which passes all understanding.  I can't say I have that kind of love and part of the reason is that , like most humans, I get stuck in the story and it impedes the progress I envision as being more meaningful than how I learned it.

So, I can't speak for anyone but me, but here is a sample of what the story of my journey into, with and out of the WCG has left me with.  They are in no particular order nor will I classify them as the bad things, the good things or the in between.  Of course I could make up a list of really negative ones like, "never trust anyone,"  "everything is bullshit," or "everyone is a liar (except me) and just out to screw you out of your mind, money and moments,"  but those aren't so much lessons as results of a perceived bad experience which was painful.  I suppose when we use the words, "everyone, everything, never and always," it is the pain speaking (painbody:) and not our genuine self.

So here are the biggies I learned up to this present time as a result of my personal story as connected and played out as a minister in WCG.

I had to resign as Master of My Universe, and admit that we actually control very little in life.

The story of others can infect my story and change my own story.

I don't have to allow the story of others to become my story but in not allowing that, I also change my own story 

We really are all small conscious parts of the same one big thing and we are all equal in it. 

I was/am responsible for my conscious and unconscious thoughts, actions, perceptions and views and that anyone of these can dramatically change my story whether I like it or not.

I chose to include WCG in my story.

I chose to want to be in the ministry of WCG aware or not aware of what may lie ahead. 

Life is not fair nor are humans who play a part in your story.

Good mental health depends on the ability to tell the story yet remember that is all it is. 




I am not my story.  I do not define myself by my story.  I cannot allow the story to define me.  

The only moment we really have is this moment.  The story is in my head and exists nowhere else.



Anger and depression lies in reliving the story or refusing to remember it could have been so many other stories.



Anxiety lies in using the story to create fear over what will happen in the future when no one on earth knows what will happen in the future.  (Sorry Dr. Bob and company)



One needs not to judge the goodness or badness of a story.  Good stories can lead to bad ones and bad stories can play out into very good ones.  Be careful what you wish for applies here. 



All suffering that comes from the story is the direct result of non-acceptance that the story happened. 



Clinging to a particular story keeps me stuck and living anywhere but the present



Sharing a story can help others with their own story



Sharing a story can be of little help to others with their own story



Pious conviction with marginal information is not good enough for me



Seeking may be more satisfying than finding



Once one finds a new story, it starts to change into another one


A
Some stories I wish I never read or heard of



I look forward to the stories that have yet to play out or I have never read or heard of yet



Realizing that I neither need to forgive anymore or require forgiveness is liberating



Never take anything personally as the reactions of others are based on their own perceptions of their own story



I spoke my truth as I understood it in the past and speak it today as the story has changed



Present truth is neither plain nor simple or set in stone



There never was nor ever will be one True Church or human beings who are more chosen than others



Any Deity who is omniscient and all knowing will completely understand my story and why I am who and what I am at this point in time.



That Deity will not judge me for my story that is different from all others as they are from mine and even HIS.

I did my best or I would have done better back then.


How about you......?  What life lessons has your story as reflected in your Church experience left you with?


Dennis C. Diehl
DenniscDiehl@aol.com

9 comments:

Allen C. Dexter said...

A hearty "amen" to every word you wrote.

If I hadn't gone with my parents to my uncle's home that fateful day of my eighteenth year, I might not have seen that "Plain Truth." My story would probably have been quite different, but I have no guarantee it would have been better, more satisfying or less traumatic.

I am where and what I am and take frequent forks in the road even now. It's quite an adventure, isn't it?`

Anonymous said...

What life lessons has your story as reflected in your Church experience left you with?

Science works and con men don't.

DennisCDiehl said...

Allen: It's all a crap shoot that gives us the impression, and it is only an impression of control..ha.

It is what it is...

Anonymous said...

The summation of what all my life lessons have taught me is the epiphany at the moment the Government IT Director told me as she RIFfed me:

"I don't know what I'm doing".

It's simple: Everyone in "authority" is incompetent and don't know what they are doing.

Take what's yours and run -- because the management can only do harm and no good ever comes from them. And management includes ministers as well as employers and government officials.

DennisCDiehl said...

Douglas. I think what we see is that everyone , if not careful, will rise to their level of incompetence. I have a total mistrust of anyone that thinks they can influence me with their views. I can listen to their views but reserve the right to reject them.

I could look a Dave Pack, Ron Weinland, Gerald Flurry type in the eyes and say, "you are so full of shit. Get over it. You simply don't know."

amen :)

Byker Bob said...

Having spent the second half of my childhood/adolescence being raised by strict WCG parents, I felt both deprived and manipulated by the whole deception when I left in 1975.

I decided to do a little catching up, to allow my own personality to develop and dominate over the planted one, and to look for what I considered real, valid, and relevant answers to this thing we all call life.

There were tons of fun, and many thrills, to be sure. Life was a constant adrenaline rush, and believe me, I got my fix every day. But no satisfying answers or real inner peace until through no conscious effort or desires of my own, God came back into my life. I still wonder why, or whose prayers He must have answered, but, considering all of the benefits and blessings, am just very thankful that He did. It has produced an awesome renaissance, one that I never would have imagined possible, and the realization that it's going to continue through all eternity is the very best part. All I had to look forward to as an agnostic had been final extinguishment and a scattering of my oxidized elements.


BB

Anonymous said...

I find the Peter Principle uncompelling. While there are occasional stories of technologists becoming managers and being really bad at it because the skill sets (if that's what you can call it) are completely different: Technologists have to work with reality and things work or they don't and when they don't there's good reason; managers on the other hand are proficient in deception and lies are at the core of the toolset they use in order to convince others that fantasy is reality.

No, for the most part, there's no rising. It is a falling: Either a falling into some (usually) political position where a person can be totally unqualified, but by reason of rank and privilege, remains in place because of the power structure where the underlings know the truth and suffer for it; or the rising tide of circumstance swamps someone who remains as they are and perishes -- sort of like the dinosaurs 60 million years ago.

Both have been true as a phenomenon in the ACoGs. Steely-eyed youths graduated and perpetrated upon congregations with the party line which was impractical in the first place but by virtue of reputation stay and abuse members as collateral damage; and also the ones around the rising waters of societal change gradually swamp them making them irrelevant with insufficient skills to claim anything but incompetence even if they have showmanship skills for outside the main circus tent.

It's not like a pastor rank minister rises to evangelist and suddenly becomes incompetent, it's more like they became incompetent in place over a period of time.

That's what you get when you are incapable or too lazy to grow in grace and knowledge as dinosaurs with Jurrasic Perks of a bygone age.

John said...

I've learned in all honesty to forgive more and judge less 'cause we're all massive screw-ups--I know I am!--especially if we deny it and like to come across as God's Gift to humanity, like some we all know who will remain nameless! And everyone has their baggage they take with them along for the ride whether it's forced upon them by their parents, siblings, or someone else. We all suffer varying degrees of stupid-itis, some more and some less. I have lost jobs and friends along the way in my search for God, and now when I finally thought I'd found his church I woke up to the awful truth that it was, as one person put it, "total nonsense." So now I've lost that too. I have very little to show for myself now and the 2 decades of my life wasted caught up by the whole "junkie-like" mystique of the ACOGs after coming across a copy of the "plain truth" when I was a teen. Now it's like I don't know where to go from here since I feel like, to use a quote from "Fight Club": "It's only when you lose everything that you're free to do anything." I no longer feel as certain about things that I once did and the more I learn the less I know! And really I don't know why people react the way they do when they find out unpleasant truths about this guy or that group, mostly out of emotion rather than reason, and get stuck in a rut, but I can't look into their heart or past and know why they are the way they are. We're all the sum of our choices and experiences be they good or bad, and nobody can judge another because "if you're measuring somebody then measure him right, measure him right and make sure you take into account what hills and valleys he's come through before he got to where he is." Besides in the grand scheme of things it's all water under the bridge ain't it?~~~~~~~

DennisCDiehl said...

Hi John, you're right and that all seems to be the common experience of the sensitive and sincere. That's why I have to look at it as just a story with lessons learned or concepts understood. I would have chosen to get them from a book with no penalties but that's not how it works evidently.

I used to say, 'experience is the best teacher but the tuition is high." Now I think, "experience is the only teacher and all else is merely hearsay."