A rerun of Dave Pack's expectations of his ministers:
Get out your pen and paper guys, you have some work to do before you jump ship to Joshua Packland. Those of you ordained in the old WCG are guilty of dereliction of duty and will be held accountable!
Important Questionnaire
A crucial series of questions present themselves before every shepherd of any rank. As you read, think hard—very, very hard!—about your original calling to serve in one or more offices under the sure guidance and direction of Christ as Head of His Church. Ask yourself each difficult question today’s circumstances require you to answer. Do not permit yourself to look away from hard realities now confronting all of God’s people.
In every age of His Church, Christ’s sheep have needed shepherds. Those with special leadership training and experience from the past will be held accountable in a greater way than all others (Jms. 3:1-2). Dereliction of duty by those “to whom much was given” will mean that “much will be required” of them some day (Luke 12:48). Take a deep breath and think of yourself standing before the “judgment seat” of Christ (II Cor. 5:10). You will be forced to give answers to HIM then if you are unwilling to demand them of YOURSELF now.
The millions constituting the physical remnant of modern Israel returning from captivity are foretold to come “weeping and loathing themselves” for having rejected God’s Way (Jer. 50:4-5; Ezek. 6:8-9). What about the spiritual remnant, who once knew that Way, but largely left it? Will/does this describe you? Read the above verses, and then read the following questions slowly, carefully and prayerfully. They are the biggest way that the ministry should “consider their ways.” Consider writing out the answers:
Did some of you lazy ass ministers retire? God is going to hold you accountable for that! Bad boy! Bad, bad, bad boy!
(1) Retirement—Mr. Armstrong taught that retirement is not an option for a true minister.Did you leave the career ministry and get another job? Your ass is grass too!
- Did you retire? If so, when, and why did you think yourself an exception?
(2) Non-Career—Mr. Armstrong taught that “going non-career” is not an option for a true minister.Did you ever dare to question doctrine or the right of HWA to set doctrine? If you did you ass is grass again!
- Did you do this? If so, why did you think yourself an exception?
(3) Established Doctrine and TraditionWere you a liberal pussy boy in the 80's and 90's?
- In what doctrines or traditions do you believe Mr. Armstrong “got it wrong”? (Include all areas—be specific.)
(4) Did you actively resist false doctrine in your ministry?—or give safe sermons where you disagreed? (Be specific.)
Did you agree with some of the changes Tkach Sr. brought about? If you did your ass is grass again!
- During the liberal years of the 1970s?
- In the WCG in the late 1980s and early 90s?
- In your splinter or splinters?
(5) On each doctrine where you came to agree with God’s enemies—either Joe Tkach, those who assisted his destruction or your splinter leader—why did you agree?Why would you even assume that I want you back in the church under me? You pathetic worthless scum!
(6) Why should you still be considered for the ministry in God’s Church?
- Why should God’s flock ever again be entrusted to your care?
- Are you prepared to re-win brethren’s trust, including brethren now here whom you will likely also pastor? What about re-winning the trust of Headquarters?
Have you been diligently searching for the one true church that is building buildings and using cable TV? These are important indications on who has the worlds most superfantabulous COG EVER!
(7) Did you actively pursue where God’s Truth, Church, Work, College and Government were found?Have you ever read any of MY propaganda on how I formed this church and studied at HWA's feet?
- If not, why not? Be specific.
- If so, how hard? Be specific.
(8) Have you read or viewed any of our Splinter Explanation Packet material?Do you believe that I, Dave, am THE man who now heads up the worlds most superfantabulous COG EVER???????
- What items? Did you at any time hear my “30 Reasons” sermons of 1993 and 1994? (Parts 1, 2 or 3?)
(9) Do you now believe again that Christ works solely through one unified organization?Are you submissive to church government? Are you too stupid to not see that my church is the only church that has it??????
(10) In light of government(s) you followed, how do you see God’s government today?Are you still worshiping at the altar of Herbert Armstrong? In order for me to be Joshua, Herb had to be Zerub, get that through your thick heads!
(11) Have you returned to believing that Mr. Armstrong was the final “Elijah”?—and Zerubbabel?Have you forgotten that only the Dear Leader can make decisions in the church? No council of elders, no board of directors, NO ONE but MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
(12) Have you returned to believing that truth only enters the Church through apostles as Mr. Armstrong said so often?
(13) Do you believe I Corinthians 12:18 applies to you with no qualifications added?
(14) Do you believe there can be exceptions to I Corinthians 1:10 and 13—regarding members or ministers in the Church?Are you willing to let me humiliate you into submission?
(15) Are you willing to temporarily or permanently become an associate pastor?Are you willing to let me publicly humiliate you in front of the church until you kneel at my feet begging forgiveness?
(16) Are you willing to be excluded from the ministry until you requalify?Are you ready to acknowledge that I have the capacity to add new doctrine to the church and to not be questioned about it?
(17) Are you familiar with the new teachings that God has added to His Church on top of what Mr. Armstrong taught?Are you willing to go top my reeducation camp where you will be trained to discard anything you think you know and learn MY way?
- Which ones?—and do you agree?
(18) If your ordination(s) is(are) invalid, are you interested in being re-trained for Christ’s true ministry?Are you stupid enough to believe that you have a voice in ANYTHING or that I even care what you think?
(19) Do you believe ministers should be able to voice opinions to others about:Are you a weak effeminate pussy-boy who has betrayed his calling?
- Where Headquarters is “wrong”?
- What Mr. Armstrong taught/said/did “wrong”?
- What Mr. Pack teaches/says/does “wrong”?
- Where your boss is “wrong” or harsh, etc.?
- Where you disagree doctrinally?
(20) Do you consider yourself as having been (rate yourself from 5 being best to 0 being worst):Why are you so stupid?
- Weak
- Cowardly
- Slothful
- Covetous
- Confused
- Compromising
- Foolish
- Political (And did you ever “run for office” in a splinter?)
- Heretical
- Deceitful
- Easily deceived
- Betrayed your calling
(21) Why did you lose the ability to “discern good from evil” (Heb. 5:13-14)?—and for so long?You really are stupid if you think I am going to give you back your ranking once you join my church.
(22) What do you consider to be your ministerial rank?Are you prepared to spend the rest of your life begging forgiveness for the messes you have created? Since I am Mr. Perfect and have no sin in my life, I will be here to guide you down that path.
Evangelist Pastor Preaching Elder Local Elder Local Church Elder “Elder” Ministerial Assistant
(23) Are you prepared to dedicate the rest of your life to serving God’s flock and fixing completely the horrific mess you helped cause in so many lives?Are you intelligent enough to recognize that I AM an apostle of God? If Herb could be one, I want to be one too!
(24) In light of how you once saw Mr. Armstrong, do you still recognize the fruits of a true apostle when you see one?
- If you say yes, why did you follow Joe Tkach until he destroyed everything?
(25) Describe your spiritual condition today. (Also, rate your temperature from 0-10, with 10 the highest.)
(26) What 5 biggest lessons did you learn from and since the apostasy? (In order of importance.)Did you fast before you answered all of these vitally important questions?
(27) How many times did you fast for 24 hours (or more) before answering these questions?How many times did you pray to me for one hour or more?
(28) How many times have you prayed over Psalm 51 on your knees?Since you are all weak impotent little men who could not take a stand on doctrine, how are you going to prove to me that you will accept ALL of my teachings without question?
(29) Having now long abandoned many doctrines you said you would never leave, how would you convince Headquarters that this time you “mean it” if you intend to now “hold fast” (Rev. 3:11)?
(30) What have been your pastoral actions during the troubles of recent weeks and months?Are you prepared to be reeducated for one year or more, just like Dale Schurter was?
(31) Are you prepared to spend a full year (or more) catching up with all you must unlearn, relearn, and learn new?Do you feel any responsibility for being a minister of a splinter group that has been cut off from my god? It is all YOUR fault that the members were disfellowshipped.
(32) What personal responsibility do you feel for the deplorable condition into which God’s people have sunk?How are you going to prove to ME that you are spirit led?
(33) How would you prove that you are still Spirit-led?—or were ever Spirit-led?
(34) What date did you leave the WCG, and why did you remain beyond May 1995, if this is the case?
(35) What did you do after reading the article “God’s People Back Together—SOON!”?All of you weak impotent little men who pretend to ministers in the splinter groups you need to be aware that you will be REQUIRED to fill out a similar questionnaire in September when you try to join up with me. Your wives are required to answer these questions too, as long as it pertains to submissive women's rules.
FINALLY: You are NOT to discuss this or share it in anyway with ANYONE (expect with me, of course)
In due course, you will be asked to fill out a questionnaire that looks very similar to this list.
*No answers that are blank, “I’m not sure” or short responses will then be permitted.
*All wives should answer the questions, including every point applicable. (Some are obviously to be skipped.)
*Aware of recent history, and the lies and deceit of so many men and leaders, DO NOT LIE TO YOURSELF!
*You are encouraged not to discuss or in any way share your answers with anyone other than God and your spouse.