Dennis Muses: Pooped Out On Popes

Pooped Out On Popes

Noticing is Not Scoffing

When I was 14, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would begin in 1972 and Jesus would return in 1975

When I was 25, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would begin in 1985 and Jesus would return in 1988

Then, when I was 48, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would begin in 2008 and Jesus would return in 2011

When I was 58, someone who thought they knew, told me the "Tribulation" would start in 2013 and Jesus would have to return by 2016

Now I am 63 and someone, who thinks they know, is telling me the "Tribulation" can't begin until 2018 and Jesus would then return in 2021

I have lived through 5 Last Popes

I am pooped out on Popes

I'm seeing a pattern here...

“The future is uncertain but the end is always near.”
― Jim Morrison



Bob Thiel Says The End Is Not Nigh But Will Happen in 2021

Bob Thiel is all in a dither about the recent spat of books that have come out by evangelicals about how the end times is here.  From Billy Graham and Michelle Bachman to lots of books, the theme of the end is at play.

He uses as his source of information the WorldNewsDaily as his source of TRUE news. WND is the favorite "news" site for the conservative Armstrongites who feel the entire world is sinking into depths of depravity, particularly here in the US with a gentile President.

Thiel says all of the "so-called Christians" and the book authors are all wrong.  Only he knows the real time of the return of Jesus Christ. 

Just as Noah did in ancient times, world-renowned evangelist Billy Graham is sounding the alarm that the Second Coming is “near” and signs of the end of the age are “converging now for the first time since Jesus made those predictions.”

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Earlier this month, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu told the United Nations General Assembly “biblical prophecies are being realized.”

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And last week, Rep. Michele Bachmann, R-Minn., claimed the world has entered the last days.

“When you see up is down and right is wrong, when this is happening, we were told this: that these days would be as the days of Noah,” Bachmann said.

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The remarks by Graham, Netanyahu and Bachmann come amid a steadily rising wave of public interest in the end times, as demonstrated by recent polls and New York Times and Amazon.com bestselling books such as “The Harbinger: The Ancient Mystery That Holds the Secret of America’s Future,” by Rabbi Jonathan Cahn, and “Four Blood Moons: Something is About to Change,” by Pastor John Hagee. http://www.wnd.com/2013/10/billy-graham-sounds-alarm-for-2nd-coming/#AuAU01RTqCOwD3ud.99

Protestant minister John Hagee and Mark Biltz have suggested 2014 as a possible date for Jesus return.

While we are in the last days, and probably in the time that Jesus referred to as the beginning of sorrows (Matthew 24:4-8), there is no possible way that Jesus will return in 2014.  Actually, I do not believe it is biblically possible that Jesus will return before 2021.

Thiel says these people are all wrong for saying the end is here, yet that has also been the same mantra that Armstrongism has spouted for over 70 years.  The end is nigh, lower your standard of living and send  your money in for the final push.

Theil then quotes, 1 Thessalonians 4:16-18, as his source for the true date so that he can declare:

 And since that tribulation cannot start for at over 3 1/2 years from now, then there are another 3 1/2 years, etc., this means that Jesus will not return before 2021.

There you have it!  You have a few more years to eat ham and shrimp and decorate that Christmas tree before you repent and return to the one true church of Bob Thiel.

Bob Thiel Now Claims He Is A True Prophet

What's a poor church leader to do?  Bob Thiel leads a personalty cult that he formed to gather members to himself.  He was never ordained in any capacity to the ministry.  He is everything that Herbert Armstrong aggressively fought against.

Because he has no real legitimacy for his position, he has to continually throw around scriptures that he thinks elevates himself to lofty ecclesiastical positions.

He claims hands were laid on him that gave him a "double dose" of the holy spirit. That was his only claim to fame for a couple of years.  Now, he is throwing around the world "prophet."

Is the naturopath ready to claim he is a prophet?

Thiel has to haul out an old Leroy Neff letter because there is nothing in his bible that legitimizes himself.

Thiel writes:

A true prophet would not need to be from a major theological institution, have the most magnanimous personality, be a great speaker, or have a large or impressive Church, but would be the type willing to meet in members’ homes. He also does not have to have had a ministerial background. God chooses who His prophets are. Notice something from the Old Testament:

14 Then Amos answered, and said to Amaziah: “I was no prophet, Nor was I a son of a prophet, But I was a sheepbreeder And a tender of sycamore fruit. 15 Then the Lord took me as I followed the flock, And the Lord said to me, ‘Go, prophesy to My people Israel.’ (Amos 7:14-15)

Theil has no theological education, is not a personable person to be around, is certainly NOT a great speaker, and does not have a church.  He also does not have any ministerial background.  According to his earlier writings, God personally "picked him" for the position he is in.

Thiel also has a secular job.  Notice how his version of a "prophet" also has a secular job:

So, a prophet also does not need to come from a ministerial family, but instead can be called if he has a secular work background.

Bob must know that he is like all the other COG prophets who have lied to members over the decades.  They made many mighty prophecies and none of them have come to pass.  Bob wants to make it known - through Leroy Neff - that it might take years or decades for a prophecy to come true.  So when Bob makes a fool out of himself when he utters something stupid, he wants a free pass for the next few decades until something happens that fits his scenario.

Leroy Neff wrote not to disqualify a prophet if some predictions take a long time to happen:

Then there is the prophet or minister who says something will come to pass and it apparently does not. Such a one would certainly be labeled false by most observers. This is one reason, but not the only reason, why almost all of God’s prophets throughout history have been labeled by many as false!

Consider such men as Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel. They sometimes prophesied for many years, and yet what they said would happen did not come to pass immediately. Why didn’t these prophecies come to pass?

The answer was that it was not yet God’s time for their predictions to come to pass. At the proper time, sometimes years or decades later, the prophecies were fulfilled. And in some cases, what they prophesied has not yet come to pass even in our day, but will be fulfilled in God’s time. There is a time, after ample warning, when God will finally say, “None of My words will be postponed any more” (Ezekiel 12:28).

There are other examples where God’s true servants expected certain events to occur in their lifetimes. During his earlier ministry, the apostle Paul apparently expected Christ to return during his life (I Thessalonians 4:17, I Corinthians 15:51).

Later, he realized that it would not occur until later (II Timothy 4:6-8) . Paul was criticized and labeled “false” by accusers, but the members of God’s Church knew he was a true servant of God. (Ibid, p. 11)

In other words, get your free pass ready to hand to Bob.  He is incapable of making a mistake.  It will all come true eventually.

Bob knows he will be ridiculed when he is a prophet, but that's OK.  His Bible says it is so:

Truly, most people will not listen to a true prophet of God in this age. And, even when God grants power to His two witnesses, most in the world will not only not listen to them, they will be deceived enough to support an army that will fight against the returning Jesus Christ (Revelation 16:13-14; 19:11-19)!

Thiel also gives a warning to the "fake" prophets that contact him.  Notice how important the laying on of hands is to him.  This is Thiel's only claim to fame.

Thus far, none who have ever contacted me and claimed to have been a prophet of some type have had hands laid upon them to give them the type of anointing that a true prophet of God would likely have had in this church age if God was selecting them. Hence, if the anointing from a true minister has not happened to you, understand that I do not now accept that you are a prophet or one of the two witnesses. Laying hands upon yourself is not enough.

Thiel was not anointed by a true minister, so why is he making  such a rule against those that come to him doing the EXACT same thign he did to Rod Meredith?

This idiot truly knows no shame as he continues trying to prove his legitimacy as a new prophet in the COG.

In my case, in November/December 2011, I prayed that if I truly had a prophetic role from God that He would have something happen during a planned mid-December 2011 trip to Charlotte, North Carolina to confirm it or deny it if that were His will. As it turned out, on 12/15/2011 hands were laid upon me in Charlotte by ordained minister Gaylyn Bonjour.  He prayed that I would be granted a “double-portion” of God’s Holy Spirit. He told me that he had not ever done this before but he felt that it was reminiscent of the time that the prophetic and ecclesiastical leadership mantle passed from the Prophet Elijah to Elisha (2 Kings 2:9-13). This minister had been unaware that I had prayed that God would have me anointed or somehow identified for a prophetic role on that mid-December 2011 trip if that were His plan for me and I had never discussed my possible prophetic role with him prior to this anointing. This 12/15/11 anointing appears to be the first biblically-appropriate prophetic anointing in the Church of God in many decades, if not many multiple centuries. And the legitimacy of this anointing has been proven by subsequent events–though many do not seem to understand how God works at times. And yes, I will add that I believe that I do have the appropriate prophetic fruits that Jesus discussed (Matthew 7:15-20) and that those truly interested in the truth can see this if they truly wish to prayfully look into this.

Herbert is rolling in his grave right now!

Imprisoned Felon Ron Weinland Says That The 6,000 Years of Bondage Women Have Been Under Is Now Lifted Because of His Wife

Ron Weinland obviously has way too much time on his hands as he continues to write the most incredibly stupid articles imaginable.  Perhaps his prison needs to  have him make more license plates in order to keep him busy.

In Ron's latest letter to his rapidly shrinking cult, he expounds on how his church has now crossed over into a spiritual plane while he is in prison.  All of his failed prophecies are now coming true, even his epic failure of 2008 is coming full circle.  It is all happening for the most part because his dingy wife Laura is the greatest Second Witness ever to have walked this earth.  Move over David C Pack, you are a pussy compared to majestic and powerful Laura!

The fulfillment of prophetic events is currently in the process of being brought back full circle to 2008. What did not happen then is now closing in again. This time, it is fully about a far greater fulfillment of the First Trumpet. Although that sound and warning occurred on December 14, 2008, the economic devastation of that blast was only beginning to be made manifest (brought to light) to the world. The destruction of a worldwide economic collapse was “held back” until a “final witness” could be established in God’s Church and in the world’s response to God’s final warnings through His Church.

So who in this entire world heeded that warning the best?  Ron's cult ministers?  David C Pack?  Gerald Flurry, Rod Meredith?  Come on, make a wild guess.......the ONE who heeded that call was the "witness" Laura.

Who listened? Who took warning? Who repented? The answer to that is the witness! Now the world is quickly nearing a second, more profound illumination and realization of the effects of that First Trumpet.

Apparently this past Feast of  Tabernacles was the Best Ever!

Throughout this Feast season, God’s Church had been experiencing this transition on a spiritual plane as most have experienced a unity and closeness that has continued to grow stronger and stronger. It is an experience that is awesome to see and understand. Even though it has not been fully put (fit) together in the minds of everyone, this Feast was never-the-less grasped as deeply meaningful because of the “focus” of the sermons and how God and Christ organized it all. It has been “an important transition” in itself.

Then Ron writes about how his church members understood the messages they heard to be directly from their god.  The people that made these comments don't sound like the brightest bulbs in the store:

God has magnified that He and His Son give the spiritual food that is timely and needed for His Church, as many have observed and commented upon in letters and ministerial reports. I especially like the way one minister stated it when he was describing what God was giving through the new speakers at this year’s Feast: “Everybody was impressed with what the guys were given in the sermons. Naturally, people had sermons that touched them more than others, but everyone knows it was all from God and the guys were just the ‘sound system’ He used.” That is a good perspective for everyone to have – for those who deliver sermons and those who listen.

All of that is just mince meat compared to the mind boggling work that Laura has been doing.  You know, the great work of the Second Witness...the one you hear about and read about in the news...remember her?  Me neither.....

One last area that is a large part of this transition from man’s age to the age of God’s reign which God’s Church is “experiencing” is one that is personally very exciting to me. It has much to do with what God has been leading His Church to “see” and begin living over the past few years. This transition has actually been spearheaded (put into action) and is being lived by my wife, Laura. God has been revealing to us about the lifting of great bondage that has been upon women over the past 6,000 years.

This phase of transition actually began when God revealed that one of the “two witnesses” of this end-time would be a woman – my wife. This indeed has been exciting as it also magnifies the importance of “family” in God’s great plan of Elohim. In Elohim, there is neither male nor female. In the Millennium, women will be esteemed in a far more meaningful, purer, and uplifting manner just as God intends it to be.

 Weinerdude is still upset that the internet immediately broke out in fits of laughter when Ron originally said he wife was Witless Witness #2.  #2 is right, but not the "witness" kind.

Once it was revealed that Laura was one of God’s end-time witnesses, mockers of what God is doing had their laughs and their moment of condemnation. Some responded by ridicule saying “how convenient” this was for me having my wife as the other witness. The truth is that it has indeed been convenient and a great blessing from God that we have been able to share such an experience together within God’s great plan that He is working out.

Thanks to Laura women are being freed from bondage.  Woo Hooo!

Laura and I have always shared in what we have been given by God to serve His people. On all trips, she has done far more counseling and giving of guidance and encouragement to people than I have. She has never been “silent,” but gifted by God to “bring out” people (help them to open up about their battles and struggles in life) and then help them by what she has spoken. Now she is being thrust forward even more due to the added load she must carry, and the Church recognizes more fully how God is using her as she speaks to congregations (not in sermons) and to the ministry about what is happening within God’s Church and what God is doing in our lives. She is doing this in all the locations where she is traveling as we are continuing to serve church areas as always with scheduled visits. In two locations this Feast season, she not only addressed the ministry, but both congregations that had gathered together at these sites.

It is a powerful encouragement to the Church, witnessing how God is working so much more through women. Women are in the process of being freed from great bondage in both the world and in the Church. Laura’s workload is becoming more visible, especially as she is continuing in a worldwide visiting program to help lead and teach the ministry as well as guide and encourage brethren in those areas.

The amazing work Weinerdude is doing in prison, and the world circling work of the second witless witness are so inspiring that everyone in the millennium will be talking about these two.