James Malm: Heathen COG's Will Be Keeping Trumpets On Wrong Day

God's greatest living apostle (after Dave Pack, of course) is James Malm.  He has declared that the TRUE Feast of Trumpets will begin at sunset on Saturday, September 7th and go through Sunday, September 8th.  It is also very important that all TRUE followers of Malm have adequate food and drink on hand because they will not be able to prepare any food for the feast because it is a double sabbath weekend.  Only heathen God haters  would dare go out to a restaurant on these two days!

Notice all the legalistic bullshit that Malm has to go through in order to keep the one true day:

The Feast of Trumpets this year will begin at sunset on Saturday September 7, 2013 and continue until sunset on Sunday September 8, 2013. 

Make sure that you are prepared and have enough food and whatever else you may need, for the Sabbath and the immediately following High Day.

The new moon will not even be potentially visible in Judea on Friday evening, Visibility is impossible from Israel on September 6, 2013 . 

The new moon will be easily visible from Israel on Saturday night September 7, 2013; making Sunday the Feast of Trumpets. 

Also the last new moon was sighted from Israel on Thursday night August 8, 2013. This makes Saturday night September 7 the 31st evening from the previous sighting. Since a lunar month can only be 29 or 30 days long, Saturday night has to be the Feast of Trumpets  by default, whether or not the moon is actually sighted.

Friday night: there will only be 21 minutes lagtime from sunset ;with 1.58% illumination.  the moon will not be seen over Judea in any case since its limit of visibility is south of Judea.

Saturday night: 58 minutes lagtime; 5.17% illumination and a more northerly position, makes a sighting of the first visible light in Judea very easy.

Bob Thiel: Jesus Who? My Church Will Be Reading The Law and Tooting Our Horns On The Feast of Trumpets

Those fun loving Jesus freaks over at the Continuing Ed Church of God will be reading the law all day on Thursday, September 5th.  No talk about that embarrassing dude called Jesus Christ, but plenty of law, law, law.

Bob Thiel, along with James Malm, feel that it is important to toot some horns on Trumpets.  These are not to be any kind of horn, but a rams horn.  However, there is one huge distinction between Thiel's "feast" day and Malm's "feast day.  They are keeping different days.  Thiel, like most COG's will be doing it on September 5th.  Malm, will be doing his horn tooting starting sunset September 7th and all day on Sunday the 8th..

Thiel believes that people should be blowing horns across the country on Thursday.

In our family, we normally have our youngest child blow on some type of trumpet to mark the beginning of the Feast of Trumpets, as well as to blow the trumpet off and on throughout the Holy Day. And although the Bible does not specify where the trumpet blowing should take place (hence I believe it should happen throughout the lands where the faithful live), I did find it interesting to learn that there was a specific place in Jerusalem that trumpeting was designated.

Thiel also made another claim that when creation happened it was fall time.  He believes this because some "sabbath keepers" in Transylvania believed creation happened in the fall.

Christian Sabbath-keepers, by the way, kept the Feast of Trumpets throughout history. Notice for example, that the Sabbath-keepers in Transylvania in the 1500s (and probably later) kept the Fall Holy Days such as the Day of Atonement and the Feast of Trumpets (called Day of Remembrance below):

The Sabbatarians viewed themselves as converted Gentiles..They held to the biblical holidays…The Day of Atonement was a day of fasting, although they emphasized that pentinence is more easily achieved by a peaceful and quiet meditation on the law and one’s life than by fasting. The Day of Remembrance (New Year, which they celebrated in the Fall of the year) was the day on which they thanked God especially for the creation of the universe. (Liechty D. Sabbatarianism in the Sixteenth Century. Andrews University Press, Berrien Springs (MI), 1993, pp. 61-62).

Some of the Jewish teachers taught that the creation was most likely in the Fall, rather than in the Spring because in Genesis 1:11 when God states, “Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb that yields seed, and the fruit tree that yields fruit”, this would be the Fall, for that is when there is both grass and fruit on trees), that the Feast of Trumpets symbolized the beginning of creation, and hence by, inference, life. The creation was likely in the Fall and various scriptures imply it (though this is not specified verbatim in scripture).

Team Ephraim Beats Team Manasseh By 4-0 In The 4th Annual Joseph Cup

Just when you think Armstrongism cant get any sillier, along comes the Flurryites and their soccer championship called Joseph Cup.  This earth shattering event is held annually on the cult compound in Edmond, OK.

EDMOND :: Philadelphia Church of God—Team Ephraim defeated Team Manasseh on August 22 by a score of 4-0 in the fourth Joseph Cup soccer match. It was the first victory for Team Ephraim in the history of the friendly rivalry between Herbert W. Armstrong College students and other PCG members held annually on the HWAC campus pitch.

The match is named after the father of biblical brothers Ephraim and Manasseh. Team Ephraim consisted of players from Britain and its current or former Commonwealth nations, including Australia, New Zealand, Canada, South Africa, and Zimbabwe. Manasseh was made up of players from eight American states.

The game was characterized by solid teamwork from the Ephraimite squad, which passed the ball effectively and kept its players spaced out. The Manassite forwards struggled to penetrate its defensive line, not registering a single shot on goal.

James Malm: If You Touch An Unclean Insect You Must Bathe To Purify Yourself And Remain Unclean Till Sunset

Did you kill that fly today with a flyswatter?  Did you step on that spider?  Did you have some larvae for lunch?  If you did, you are filthy disgusting sinner in the sight of Malm's god.  You must go take a long hot bath and remain unclean till the sun sets tonight.  Evil sinner!

INSECTS

11:20 All fowls that creep, going upon all four, shall be an abomination unto you.
11:21 Yet these may ye eat of every flying creeping thing that goeth upon all four, which have legs above their feet, to leap withal upon the earth; 11:22 Even these of them ye may eat; the locust after his kind, and the bald locust after his kind, and the beetle after his kind, and the grasshopper after his kind. 11:23 But all other flying creeping things, which have four feet [but do not have legs to leap with], shall be an abomination unto you.

To  even touch the carcase [dead body[ of an unclean creature; becomes unclean and must bathe and be unclean until the sun is set.

James Malm: It Is OK To Touch Living Unclean Animals But Once They Are Dead It Is A Major Sin

True followers of James Malm's god are to immediately STOP wearing anything made with the skin of an unclean animal.  To do so is to commit a major sin against his god.  No more unclean belts or shoes.  No more unclean leather jackets or leather biker wear.  You can not sit on unclean leather seats in your vehicle or that leather chair at home.  God forbid if you happen to eat some jello!  Damnation and Armageddon fire for you!

We must not trust the apostate from Moses rabbinate to be our guide.  It would be far better to trust the scriptures themselves and learn to discern between the clean and the unclean for ourselves.  As far as source labeling, look for gelatin made from sea weed like Agar gelatin.  Vegan vegetarian labeling is far more credible than kosher  such matters.

God separated certain animals as clean and others as unclean, to teach us the object lesson that there is a difference between the holy and the profane.

Living “unclean” animals are not unclean to touch and neither is the hair or wool sheared from living animals; it is the DEAD animals that are unclean and not to by eaten or even touched.  That means that the skin and furs of dead unclean animals is not to be touched.

James Malm Says Our Homes Are Polluted With Pigs Blood!

James Malm is on a roll today!  Your homes are polluted with pigs blood in your plywood floors and carpets!  Who knew! 

Even Jesus Christ is appalled by Pharisee Malm.

A Malmite writes to James:

Good post. I think that the latter half of Leviticus 11 has been ignored for a long time, and it is proof that we should not be visiting ANY restaurant that serves unclean food at all — verse 35 proves that, and it was nice to see you place extra emphasis on that verse.
Also, thanks for the extra emphasis on touching unclean skins — consider that many shoes have pigskin leather, kangaroo leather sometimes, and more, so it is more than just fur to watch out for.
I don’t know whether the idea of clean/unclean being about “health” came from the Jews or from the COGs, but health is mentioned NOWHERE in Leviticus 11 or Deuteronomy 14. Only holiness is mentioned, and TWICE in Leviticus 11:44-45. These are instructions that have to do with us being SEPARATE from the world, HOLY, and these instructions also have to do with NOT MIXING, which is a central theme throughout the vast majority of the Law, such as not mixing cloth, seed, animals, clean and unclean, and so on.
So many people don’t understand the concept of not mixing… entertainment with a “mix” of good and bad is a real prime example of that.

The Chief Pharisee responds:

Our world is totally unclean and we must do the best we can. Our homes are polluted by the plywood and carpets etc which are put together with glue made from proteins in pig’s blood, our markets use the same utensils to cut all types of meats. And most restaurants are unclean.

All we can do is to do the best we can, and to focus on avoiding the spiritual uncleanness of association with sin, at least as much as we are concerned about physical uncleanness.

If we are careful to avoid pork, and we vicariously indulge in the sins of others [which is what spiritual uncleanness is about]; we are still unclean.

That is part of the object lesson: as James wrote James 1:27 Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.

James Malm Says It May Be OK To Defile Yourself By Touching The Dead. The Apostles Did It, So Can You....

Can you imagine what life is like living with this legalistic bullshitter?  Talk about a truly miserable life.

UPDATE 12:EDT:  I wanted to add to todays post that we may defile ourselves to bury our dead.  A classic example being the burial of Christ and the speed with which he was buried so that the disciples could rush home and wash themselves before the evening began the first High Day of The Feast of Unleavened bread.

John 19:21   When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said, It is finished: and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost.  ³¹ The Jews therefore, because it was the preparation, [day (Passover day) for the first Holy Day of Unleavened Bread]  that the bodies should not remain upon the cross on the sabbath day, (for that sabbath day was an high day,)

The body was buried quickly nearby because they had to rush home to wash and prepare for the High Day of Unleavened Bread which began at sunset.

John 19:44   There laid they Jesus therefore because of the Jews’ preparation day; for the sepulchre was nigh at hand.