The Two Witless Witnesses
The Church knew that in time God would provide two prophets for the end-time who would be known as the two end-time witnesses. Back in the 1970s, it was speculated that those two might even be the two who were seen as being the primary leaders of God’s Church at that time—Herbert W. Armstrong, who was God’s apostle, and his son, Garner Ted Armstrong, the leading evangelist at that time. However, they were not those witnesses, and those two witnesses would not come on the scene until nearly three decades later.
When people read about the Seals of Revelation, everyone in the past has taken them to mean that they are all literal, physical events that must unfold. Even today, the true Church that became scattered back in 1994, as the result of a great prophesied Apostasy, has looked upon the seals in only a physical manner. God had not yet revealed those things to His prophets; prophets had not yet been established in His Church. The Church was not accustomed to having any such thing as prophets in it.
When God began to reveal the true meaning of the Seals of Rev- elation to me, as His prophet, the Church that had become scattered did not receive it. They would not receive what was revealed because they would not receive me as a prophet being sent by God. Although it is yet to be covered, God has prophesied that he will offer to 63,000 who were scattered the opportunity to come to see the truths of these prophecies before Christ’s return.
6 comments:
The "Church of God" hasn't rejected these cretins. Armstrongism has. Howsomever, probably if people from the body of Christ knew about the Weinlands, the gift of discernment would force them to reject Ron and Laura as well.
maybe I'm prejudiced but these two just don't look right to me. Too old, too well fed, an old woman?, an old bald men who might have a heart attack? I expect my witnesses to at least be a bit more vital looking, perhaps Biblical looking? Have I seen too many movies?
Who would've guessed the two witnesses would look like Uncle Fred and Aunt Ethel...
Where's the rubber chicken?
If they are the two witnesses, I'm the bloody queen of Britain.
Everyone is born, lives for a while, and then dies.
Some people grow up to become liars and thieves, who claim to be prophets and demand other people's money.
Other people grow up to be suckers who listen to the liars and thieves who demand their money.
What happened to my joke of me being the two witnesses. It makes as much sense as Ron and his wife being the two witnesses.
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