Friday, January 27, 2023

Restored Church of God: “…we wanted to inoculate you to the possibility…that any hour of any day works”





Monday, January 23 @ 10:04 AM ET

Tuesday, January 24 @ 10:05 AM ET

Wednesday, January 25 @ 10:06 AM ET

Thursday, January 26 @ 10:07 AM ET

Thursday, January 26 @ 11:35 PM ET


You cannot make this stuff up.


It is hard to decide whether to laugh or scream.


Based on a posting last night, David C. Pack is broadcasting that he is counting on the brethren of The Restored Church of God to be blind idiots suffering from short-term memory loss.


Maybe that is too harsh. He needs them to be acquiescent weaklings ignorant of the Bible, so paralyzed with fear they choose the vexation of inaction over applying godly principles to free themselves from a false prophet preaching a false god.


That is what he is banking on. But that is not WHO they are.


Members know what is going on and are doing their best to cope. One universal strategy is to stop listening to Dave. Across the board, people I communicate with still inside The Restored Church of God admits to avoiding Dave at every opportunity. Some only listen to him when they are forced to during Services because other brethren are there. Otherwise, “A new Part? Skip.”


Can you imagine? The Pastor General thinks his knowledge came down from heaven, and he is charged under the penalty of death to preach it, and the sheep paying his salary cannot stand the sound of his voice. God's True Church, indeed.


Dave is also crossing his fingers that none of these captives exercise their minds as he instructed because that would only lead to disaster. Critical thinking and Bible study expose what David C. Pack is. He is not a goodman. Never was. Never will be.


Brian Jackson and Larry Cockshutt now have to hold their breath every time they check their email.



Before reading the update, remember what was said six days ago during “The Greatest Unending Story! (Part 416).”


Part 416 – January 21, 2023

@ 00:32 Go into this knowing Abib 1 is still our absolute prophetic anchor. It’s inviolable.

@ 23:30 I can tell you, I’m about out of material. I do not plan another message beyond tonight.

@ 24:28 Because I’m telling you, after seven years and over two more months, the well is dry.

@ 29:45 And when correctly understood with what I'm gonna call "stone-cold math," we may know exactly where we are in a few minutes.

@ 34:23 Because Abib 1 is not gonna move. It’s Mount Everest…it’s fixed. It can’t float away on us.

@ 41:37 So, if I’m reading this correctly [Matthew 24:15-20], I don’t see any way you can even get to Thursday morning our time. It’s stone-cold math.

@ 47:07 It is interesting that the goodman of the house is charged with telling the brethren the hour and the watch…when the thief would come. And so, I've told you that. Per Headquarters time, it's around 10 in the morning. Anytime from tomorrow morning, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and I guess if you'd say Thursday…It's possible. It's possible.

@ 48:18 Because the Kingdom may actually be longer than 45 days. It could be 46-7-8 or 9 days. It just can’t be more than that.

@ 1:00:17 The long struggle is over.

@ 1:02:21 I think math has brought us what we’ve been waiting for a long time. Good night.


Yeah. About all of that…


Dave’s stone-cold math turned out to be more hot air.


When things like this keep repeating, it would be wise to ask, “Where did that idea come from in the first place? From the mind of God? From the Spirit of Error? From a madman?”


Another heinous block of text appeared in Member Services last night. It ain’t pretty.



Prophecy Update – January 26, 2023


Yesterday’s email still applies, but we wanted to inoculate you to the possibility of time continuing for days, not just hours. We thought the delay was hours, when in fact it could be days. There are now even more metrics proving this is the year. One thing that has troubled us for a very long time is that a number of verses point to the possibility/probability(?) that Christ seemed to be on schedule for a Sabbath arrival. We would not know the hour, including the complicated fact that the Sabbath is somewhere on Earth for 48 hours. But remember that any hour of any day works.



“…we wanted to inoculate you to the possibility…”


They want to inoculate the brethren to the idea that timing is wrong, just not the source. The understanding is wrong, but not the man who invented it. The conclusions were off, but not the mouth that spoke the words.


Why do the enablers at Headquarters not consider that David C. Pack is the problem, not how the Bible is being privately interpreted?


Because that is what enablers do. They enable. They excuse. They ignore the harsh truth of reality. The Pastor General of The Restored Church of God failed five times this week, and the Headquarters hirelings are totally fine with it.


Bradford Schleifer – Fine with it

Edward Winkfield – Fine with it

Ryan Denee – Fine with it (actually not behind closed doors)

Jaco Viljoen – Fine with it (actually not, but prefers Ohio to South Africa)

Timothy Ranney – Fine with it

Kenneth Orel – Fine with it (wondering what everyone is talking about)

Carl Houk – Fine with it

James Habboush – Fine with it (a hot wife means God can take as long as He wants)

Andrew Holcombe – Fine with it

Salasi Jezhi – Fine with it (actually not, but forces a smile)

Frank Lydick – Fine with it (maybe not, but hard to read)

Raymond Garb – Fine with it (realizing too late he is in over his head)



“…are now even more metrics proving…”


Please tell me that even the All-Believing Zealots no longer buy this empty assurance. These have the same value as the unpresented points from Part 416 that evaporated by Monday. That is an old magician's trick. The illusion of substance is shattered by objective scrutiny.


“I’ve got one million dollars in my pocket.”

"Oh, yeah? Show me."

“Believe me. It’s there.”

“Prove it.”

"I have to go pee."


Abib 1 was curiously not mentioned during this Pathetic Update but was substituted with “proving this is the year.” They could be foreshadowing that Abib 1 is no longer “our prophetic anchor of the soul.”


That is the speculation of an unordained non-prophet/non-psychic specializing in Dave Whispering. The acceptable margin for error is +/- 10%.



“…any hour of any day works.”


Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Haaaaaa haaa haaa haaa ha ha.


And there is the punchline. A big, fat Headquarters shrug to send folks off into the weekend.


This is the blue sky, “all is possible with God” conclusion of the matter. Throw out all 416+ parts of “The Greatest Unending Story!” because any hour of any day works. We are so thankful to have you guys around to relay such profound secrets of the cosmos!


Did Dave roll back the Prophetic Understanding Clock to Pre-Elul 24 2012 thinking?


I do not think so. That was in reference to the timing being "this year" with Abib 1 not yet officially divorced. Maybe a trial separation. That does not always end in doom for a marriage. But it does not look good.



It is anyone’s guess who will be thrown into the fire up to the lectern on Sabbath to make insulting reassuring comments to irritate encourage the members of RCG. Dave will be too cowardly busy to come down from the Ivory Tower Third Floor Executive Imaginarium to look people in their faces and tell them how off on track they are.


Part 417 is on the way. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe next week. One more step on the road to Part 500.


The Spirit of Error is fully rooted in the Hall of Administration at Headquarters. It is hard to know if David C. Pack is the parasite or the host in that relationship.


The Pathetic Update tried to soothe the brethren from further disappointment and confusion. Instead, consider rereading “Is ‘That Prophet’ Alive Today?” and “There Came A Falling Away.” Give the three-part “30 Reasons to Follow the Truth” sermon a fresh listen.


Brethren of The Restored Church of God, do not settle for excuses. Prove all things. Engage in critical thinking. Exercise your mind.


Use the Bible to inoculate yourself against the fraudulent teachings of David C. Pack.

Marc Cebrian

See: Inoculate 


DW said...

I know that in certain splinters, members are NOT ALLOWED to read their Bibles, on their own, without "ministers" present to twist it toward the dear leaders teachings. Is that the case in RCG? I think it must be, because everything Dave says is so easily disproved. However, I have never heard anyone say that is, in fact, the case in RCG.

A very basic Bible study by any member of RCG would resolve any question they might have and nuclear up the cognitive dissonance that might be troubling them. Are they allowed to read commentaries or, dare I ask, any protestant authors and/or view their sermons?

If the answer to the above questions is no, that is one of the first signs you are in an abusive, heterodox cult. As is often said on Banned, truth has nothing to fear from investigation. What possible objection could Dave (or any current cog splinter "leader") have to thoughtful questions being asked or folks studying the Word of God on their own? I can think of many objections he (they) likely have, but how do they enforce it? Why don't the members take advantage of the Bibles that are in their homes, phones, laptops, etc, and learn the truth for themselves? All the answers to their questions are in there. They just need to find the courage to do their own homework. Jesus, truth and freedom await, if you can just find the courage!

Anonymous said...

The only logical explanation for all this stupidity and madness is that the boy has snapped. That's right, he's gone off the deep end, and now resides in the Twilight Zone. Rod Serling is so envious he's considering returning from the dead.

Tonto said...

Is Pack getting his predictions from listening to the Beatles "White Album" backwards again??

Anonymous said...

The Jewish Calendar has "parts" which each are 3 and 1/3 seconds. It is now, for some time, for DP to determine in which part his god will that the enablers will continue to be mesmerized and keep sending him money.

Anonymous said...

He needs them to be acquiescent weaklings ignorant...

You mean he's mandating the tin-foil "covid" mask in the land of the free?

Anonymous said...

About 1% of my waking time, I used to kind of sort of wonder, "What if Armstrongism is actually correct?" Not enough to repentantly turn myself in to some splinter leader, mind you, but just kind of subliminally. At the time I first signed on to the internet, I had no idea there were splinters of the mothership, or who might be leading them, but watching their antics over the oast twenty plus years has totally obliterated any such wonderings about Armstrongism being true on my part. Look around! There is no such thing as a nonridiculous ACOG! HWA was an absolutely ridiculous fanatic, I just hadn't realized it during the time frame in which my parents were spoon feeding my siblings and I all of his horrible, self-serving heresies, conspiracy theories, and just plain bullshit!

But, alas. I woke up in 1975 when his "hook" came undone. I cannot even fathom how some people could imagine that his crap had simply been delayed. Now we're down to some people who believe that each day the delay will be lifted and the entire Armstrong prophecy passage will begin to kick in. And yet the entire generation of people to whom his warning was geared has passed, and now their kids are rapidly passing as well. As one of those kids, I just have to laugh, and to say "Hooray! We won! We actually got to live the life he said would never happen!"

What a horrible parasite HWA was! And also his imitators who idolize him!