Dave Pack: Chasing the Prophetic Unicorn

 

Chasing the Prophetic Unicorn

David C. Pack of the Restored Church of God does not seem to grasp the concept that unicorns are mythical creatures that only exist in the imagination. Some can wonder whether he really believes the goofy ideas spewing out of his mouth or if he simply lacks the basic mental capacity that most adults develop.

The reality is an unfortunate blend of both.

Since every prophetic neuron firing in his brain is accepted as God’s inspiration, he believes his most convoluted theories…temporarily. But to compound matters, the Pastor General is also a theological nincompoop desperate for validation. He will thunder, pound the table, and demonstrate his signature “arrogant sniff” during dramatic pauses, even though his avalanche of proofs is constructed with wet cardboard and smoke.

Perhaps he is trolling his doubters by intentionally creating content gold that he knows will invite ridicule when examined carefully and critical thinking is applied.

During the “Greatest Untold Story! (Part 628),” given on March 21, 2026, the Pastor General admitted that finding the date for the return of Jesus Christ and the Kingdom of God is a unicorn. The unicorn that he and the RCG brethren have been chasing after has finally been captured.

Part 628 – March 21, 2026
@ 13:54 Apparently, we're looking for some kind of of unicorn. Reserve potentially for one-time use. Some kind of theological, or biblical, or scriptural date. Unicorn date.

Dave is so proud of the dopey little phrases that he thinks are colorful analogies. He loved the idea of a unicorn so much that he repeated it 11 times.

Instead of being clever, he is conjuring yet another dismal swamp filled to the brim with malarkey, discovered by using stone-cold math on a path paved with empty coincidences that will later be a plentiful source of embarrassment. So much for the days of a "precision of doctrine."

The Old Testament prophets could not figure it out. The New Testament apostles could not figure it out. But humble, ole shepherd David C. Pack figured it out.

The Kingdom of God Arrives on Abib 24 (April 10, 2026)

One tiny little fact escaped Dave and his enablers. He taught Abib 24 last year. This year is sure to be equally productive.

Flashback Part 571 – April 19, 2025
@ 1:17:43 What would I tell you, brethren? How could I stand up here and say, “Well, I don’t know. Maybe it’s not the 24th.” If it’s not, you’re never gonna hear me say that.

@ 1:36:41 I guess you could say it could be the 24th next year. …And man, if it’s not the 24th, as I said before, I will never say that.

 

The Kingdom of God will arrive on Abib 24. That Hebrew calendar date begins on April 10, 2026, at sunset. The details of whether the Kingdom arrives at sunset or dawn, based in Jerusalem or Wadsworth, are still being worked out.

Part 628 – March 21, 2026
@ 09:11 The Bible is true. Now, you may think, “Why do you need to tell yourself that, Mr. Pack?” Well, because I'm trying to figure something out, which is so hard [chuckles], and there are many, many dates that turn out to be false.

Well, 141 to be exact. Abib 24, starting at sunset on April 10, 2026, will be 142. But, really…who’s keeping track of such trifles?

@ 13:45 Well, we've never figured it out. I have now.

God has a sense of humor and is a fan of irony. Every time Dave explains that the mystery date is a unicorn, he exposes his sublime blindness. It never dawns on him that he is telling the brethren of The Restored Church of God that they are seeking something that does not exist.

@ 15:15 But there’s only one date. What I call a, you know, a unicorn that's out there that no one's been ever been able to figure out.

I am not qualified to know if David C. Pack is clinically an idiot, but he seems so focused on rushing words out of his mouth that he does not bother to allow his ears to hear them. Maybe if his brain got those two to pay attention to each other, fewer dumb ideas sold as “present truth” would need to be recanted.

Since unicorns do not exist, neither does the magical date David C. Pack seeks to discover. The arrival of Jesus Christ and the Kingdom of God is inevitable, but David C. Pack will never be the one to figure it out. Never. He will catch a live unicorn before he unveils the correct date for God doing anything.

@ 17:35 You're gonna see this this date emerges with a clarity that will just blow your mind. You'll blow your mind. Shock you, really. It it it this date that nobody could figure out comes with an avalanche of proof. An avalanche of proof.

No matter how high the pile of malarkey is stacked, David C. Pack will never be correct about the coming Kingdom of God. But he has no problem blaspheming and taking the Lord’s name in vain when he lays false doctrines at God’s feet.

The man does not even know how to blush.

@ 34:34 So, unless it were revealed to me, what God had concealed in His Word, though He might make me sort of search it out and dig and scratch. Eventually, He would reveal it, and I would I would know the date.

Remember that David C. Pack credited God for the teaching that the Kingdom of God will arrive on Abib 24 in the next few days. That should be most important to the brethren of The Restored Church of God when he walks it back or puffs his chest that he “knew it wudden’t gonna happen.” Like in 2025.

@ 35:13 But, like I said, now that all of what God is gonna do has been resolved, I'm not gonna change any of it

@ 1:28:05 So, we're learning about this unicorn date that appears to be two days after Passover, three weeks away.

Dave will never catch his unicorn. But he will keep trying and trying and trying as long as the RCG brethren allow him to.

@ 1:45:52 God as much as could have said, “We gotta create a unicorn. A date no one will ever think about or even refer to again.”

He seeks a date he will never find. He chases after something he will never catch. Secret truth will never be revealed to him. You will see a Bible riding a unicorn before you see that.

 

@ 55:51 It suggests you got out of the Days of Unleavened Bread. Two days after the Days of Unleavened Bread is the Sabbath of the 24th. The Bible does talk an awful lot about the 24th. Now, we're just, but we gotta prove it.

There is no end to the numbers Dave has previously claimed that the "Bible talks an awful lot about." His fixation is with Abib 24 for the moment.

No prophetic explanation is complete without a few coincidences to tip the scales.

@ 1:01:28 And by the way, this man whose last name is Passover, couldn't help but think about the fact that this church was reformed on the second Passover. Why?

@ 1:41:14 Now, the odds are 364 to 1 that this church would begin on the second Passover. Is that a coincidence?

@ 1:55:24 A Sabbath, anciently, after the Exodus in the 24th is the Sabbath this year, not last year. 19-plus days away. It appears after so long a journey and wondering that the 1335 days serves five purposes. I wanna tell you why they would be 24 days before the 24th.

@ 1:58:46 This very date is literally part of the Mystery of God having disappeared from history.

What has disappeared from Headquarters at The Restored Church of God is theological integrity, critical thinking, Bible literacy, accountability, and men of strength holding fast to the truth. Those are now phantom unicorns roaming the Main Hall and in the Third Floor Executive Imaginarium.

But the RCG brethren have a bigger unicorn to fry: the idea that David C. Pack will ever fulfill the role of Elijah the Prophet. The Pastor General and human idol’s prophetic role is the fat unicorn in the room. He is no prophet, no apostle, and does not speak with God’s authority.

The All-Believing Zealots who cling to that notion will someday face the reality that all that they are now taught in The Restored Church of God are the manifestations of one man’s twisted imagination.

The Abib 24, 2026, arrival of the Kingdom of God is not the only unicorn they are chasing.You will see unicorns fly before you see David C. Pack accomplish anything biblical.

Marc Cebrian

Chasing the Prophetic Unicorn

Thou Shalt Not!!!!!!!!!

 

Prophetic Message From Rome: Jesuits, King Cyrus, Babylon, Great Britian, Catholics, Demons, Concentration Camps and Germans...Lot's of Germans

Brethren, buckle up — the end times are apparently reaching peak comedy gold, and Samuel Kitchen is live from Rome with another breathtaking installment of “How My Canceled Flights Prove I’m God’s Prophet.”

As we noted in the previous dispatch about Samuel’s heroic odyssey to Jordan (oops, my bad — Rome), God’s freshest self-anointed mouthpiece has once again treated us to his latest Facebook prophecy dump. Because nothing says “thus saith the Lord” quite like proof-texting Scripture around airline disruptions while blaming the Jesuits, Germans, and Catholics for every evil under the sun.

According to Samuel’s groundbreaking geopolitical-theological breakthrough:

Rome = Western Leg Constantinople = Eastern Leg

First round: Hitler revived the eastern German leg, Mussolini played dress-up with the western Italian one.

Now for the grand finale — the Beast Revival 2.0

After World War II, Hitler’s system supposedly slithered underground like a bad horror movie villain, then spread its tentacles worldwide through those ever-convenient Jesuit platforms and Catholic ratlines. America and Britain, those poor, naive Israelite nations, were already crawling with Catholic influence thanks to Jesuit infiltration in governments and schools. German rationalism was rising, and we just couldn’t help ourselves — we fell head over heels in love with Assyria.

We rebuilt Germany. We cheered on a united Germany. And now, surprise surprise, Germany is under the Beast!

But wait, there’s more! The final revival of the Holy Roman Empire — those famous ten toes of Daniel, part Gentile, part Israelite — is about to drop. The Beast is getting its power straight from the dragon, and the ten nations of Europe are eagerly handing over their strength like obedient little puppets.

Samuel then drops the real bombshell: An Assyrian (a white Gentile man, naturally) is going to rise up as the “stranger who becomes the head” over the children of Israel, exactly as warned in Leviticus 26. This is all our fault, of course, because we’ve sinned and stubbornly refuse to repent.

Who is the modern King Cyrus? Who heads the Babylon system? Who has entered the glorious land and is throwing a fit over news from Russia and Iran? Why, it’s the mighty German Revival! The Italian half will be powered by the Pope (conveniently American) using good old Israelite soil — especially America/Manasseh — as the axis for the two iron legs.

Just like that Italian guy Napoleon once used France/Reuben as one of the heads of the Beast, now a German man and an Italian Pope are hijacking America for the final act. This means the King of the North already has dominance over what used to be the United States of America.

It’s all mirroring the 1979 receivership so perfectly! A receiver came in, tallied the books, liquidated assets, and purged anyone who opposed the new leadership. Funny how that gave us a bird’s-eye preview of our nation’s current trajectory.

And don’t forget what happened when Herbert W. Armstrong died: the membership was promptly shoved into concentration camps, forbidden from fellowshipping with fellow brethren unless they abandoned their group — and with it, all their benefits and standing. The real Worldwide Church of God, Samuel assures us, consists only of those brave souls who stayed outside these compromised groups.

Everyone still trapped inside has already submitted to the restoration of the Holy Roman Empire. That restoration will reach its glorious climax when the ten European nations fully surrender their power and strength to the Beast.

Remember 2013, when Pope Francis boldly claimed ownership of every corporation willing to bow to the Vatican? We’re watching the Holy Roman Empire rise from the ashes — and it’s all because we became lovers of Assyria instead of obeying God. How romantic.

Samuel wraps up with yet another faith-affirming travel miracle: While flying from Iowa to Chicago, he met a creepy old man who claimed he once spoke directly to the King of Persia, who instructed him to go to Italy. The man hoped Samuel would meet the Pope and bring back a blessing. Samuel, of course, discerned this as clear demonic influence. Because who in their right mind talks to the King of Persia?

This random airport encounter naturally confirms that God supernaturally detoured him to Rome (he never planned to come here!) and even bumped him ahead of schedule. Divine timing at its finest.

---

Samuel's Facebook post:

Rome = WESTERN LEG

Constantinople = EASTERN LEG

BEFORE: Hitler was a revival of the eastern leg(German restoration).Mussolini was a revival of the western leg(Italian restoration).

Next: Hitler’s system went underground at the end of WW2. It became systemic, branching into all nations using the Jesuit platform and Catholic ratlines used by Hitler during WW2.

America and the UK already had Catholic followers, and influences, via the workings of the Roman Catholic Church, via Jesuits to bring all of the world under Papal rule. So we integrated them in our governments and schools, as German rationalism was already rising up among the Israelite nations of western society.

We became lovers with Assyria, you see.

And we in the United States and British governments have rebuilt Germany, and helped establish a united Germany.

But remember the Beast is given POWER from the dragon, and the ten nations that make up the final revival of the Holy Roman Empire,the ten toes in Daniel, part gentile and part Israelite.

Germany is under the Beast! So this brings up a question of where the man who will be the beast will rise up from?

The United States is the last great country of the children of Israel. The sun has already set on Great Britain.

An Assyrian, is a white gentile man, and is therefore the stranger who has BECOME THE HEAD, that God talks about in Leviticus 26. So this gentile man will become LEADER, of the children of Israel in this end time.

This is appointed over us because we have sinned against God! And because we refuse to repent!

Now, who is called King Cyrus today?

Who is the Head of the Babylon system?

Who has entered the glorious land? Who is troubled by news from Russia and now Iran?

This is the GERMAN REVIVAL!

The Italian revival will be done through the Pope who also now is American, connecting to the German revival.

They are using Israelite ground, as the axis for the two legs!

Just as an Italian named Napoleon used France/Rueben as one of the heads of the Beast power, so does a German man and Italian man use America/Mannaseh as the final revival.

What can this tell us? That events are much closer than we realize! And the King of the North has DOMINANCE OVER TERRITORY formally known as the United States of America.

It mirrors also the receivership of 1979.

A receiver has come in, tallied up all the business and financial accounts, began liquidating debts, property, and removing figures that opposed their leadership.

Funny how the 1979 receivership gave us a Birds Eye view and perspective of what our people and nations are going into now!!!

And when Herbert W Armstrong died, what happened? The membership were pushed into concentration camps, unable to meet their fellow brethren, unless they leave the confines of their group, and therefore lose their benefits and standing in that group.

The Worldwide Church of God are those OUTSIDE OF THESE GROUPS!

Now those in these groups have come under the restoration of the Holy Roman Empire! That restoration is made complete with the ten nations in Europe giving the Beast their power and strength!

Remember in 2013, Pope Francis claimed ownership of all corporations in the world. If they were to subjugate themselves under the Vatican.

We are seeing a revival of the Holy Roman Empire! And they are using us because we have become lovers to Assyria, rather than to obey God!!!!

Another report of what happened on this trip to Rome: when I left Iowa, heading to Chicago, I met an older man, an odd man. He asked me where I was going, and I said Italy.

He said “I talked to the King of Persia once, and he told me to go to Italy. Hopefully you meet the Pope. Receive a blessing for me because I need it.”

Now to me, this man was surely influenced by a demon spirit. Because what man would say they talked with the King of Persia?

He felt I would meet the Pope on this trip. It made me kind of wonder what God is doing. I did not plan to come to Italy!!! I was detoured and rerouted here and even ahead of schedule!

So we will soon find out. Tonight is the Passver service. Let us be humble brethren and let us discern the Lord’s body, and take this Passover worthily.

In Christ’s service,

Samuel W Kitchen

God Has Sent Samuel Kitchen To Rome As A Warning!

Just when you thought the craziness in COG-LaLaLand couldn’t possibly get any more unhinged, along comes Samuel Kitchen to shatter that illusion once again.

Poor Samuel had grand plans to spend Passover and the Days of Unleavened Bread on the east side of the Jordan River, piously retracing the footsteps of ancient Israel. But alas, the God of the universe (or perhaps the U.S. Air Force and the Israeli Defense Forces) had “other plans.”

Thanks to the ongoing obliteration of Iran’s corrupt regime — much to the quiet delight of the long-suffering Iranian people — airspace over the region has become more unpredictable than a Church of God minister’s prophetic timeline. Flights were canceled left and right, routes vanished into thin air, and Samuel’s carefully arranged journey to Jordan mysteriously evaporated.

Instead of landing in Amman, our intrepid prophet found himself rerouted through an epic odyssey: Chicago → Belgrade → Budapest → Krakow → Rome → (supposedly) Amman. But when the Rome-to-Amman leg was abruptly canceled, Samuel was left holding non-refundable tickets into the Eternal City.

Naturally, he interpreted this not as a travel agency’s nightmare or the chaos of war, but as divine intervention. So he canceled his Jordan plans, extended his stay, and is now “stuck” in Italy for two weeks — all because God clearly wanted him there.

Behold, brethren! The Lord has spoken… through airline cancellations.

Samuel has now declared himself sent by God to warn Rome — our modern-day Jericho, which he says pictures Babylon the Great. He even compared his adventure to the Apostle Paul being sent to Rome. (Because nothing says “humble servant of God” like equating your missed flight to the Book of Acts.)

He helpfully points out that Rome’s taxi number is 060606 — you know, because 666 is totally not suspicious at all when you’re claiming to be a prophet.

Here’s Samuel’s own account, cleaned up just enough so you can fully appreciate the majestic levels of cope:

---

Hello brethren,

What an adventure I have been on!

Back in December I booked and paid for a trip to Jordan to visit the area where the children of Israel gathered before crossing the River Jordan. Everything was arranged before my trip to Pasadena in January.

Because of the war with Iran, all airspace was closed. I kept hoping. Every time my flight was canceled, I rerouted through another airport, trying desperately to reach Amman on time. This turned my tickets into a non-refundable mess.

My itinerary ballooned into: Chicago → Belgrade, Serbia → Budapest, Hungary → Krakow, Poland → Rome, Italy → Amman, Jordan.

Days before departure, my Rome-to-Amman flight was canceled due to closed airspace. I was now stuck with non-refundable tickets into Rome.

So I canceled my return flight from Amman and my accommodation there. I am now staying in Italy for two weeks.

On Sunday I landed in Budapest after a delay from Serbia, which caused me to miss my connecting flight to Poland. I bought the only available ticket — a direct flight to Rome, arriving a day earlier than planned.

I ran into more trouble once I reached Rome, but I’ll report on that later. God is definitely moving things where He wants them. And He is letting everyone know I am here in Italy.

It reminds me of the scripture where the Lord spoke to Paul about going to Rome.

I was planning to look at Jericho from the east side of the Jordan and visit Mt. Nebo. But instead, God has redirected me to Rome — our modern-day Jericho, which pictures Babylon. What God pictured in Joshua will happen to Babylon: on the final trumpet, Babylon will fall.

I will report more on what has happened since landing in Rome later. (By the way, taxis in Rome are governed by the municipality. Did you know their phone number is 060606? Interesting, isn’t it?)

Remember brethren, not only must the Beast rise and receive power, but also the False Prophet.

Ever since my visit to Jerusalem, a man of Assyrian descent has heard tidings from the north (Russia) and from the east (Iran), and has gone forth with great fury (Daniel 11:44). Now, I am sent to Rome?

Notice Zechariah 2! [insert lengthy proof-texting about measuring Jerusalem, fleeing the daughter of Babylon, walls of fire, etc.]

This, of course, is about the restoration of the Worldwide Church of God!

I eagerly study the writings of Paul concerning Rome. It also applies spiritually to the churches of this world. These COG groups only exist due to Roman accreditation through their 501(c)(3) status. The world will become Rome again. Enforcement is coming, will it not?

Romans is an excellent book. It talks about the distinction between true members of the Church and those who lie.

Please pray for me, and I will continue to report soon.

In Christ’s service,

Samuel W. Kitchen

---

There you have it. While Bob Thiel and Gerald Flurry are reportedly curled up in the fetal position sobbing into their prophetic charts, Samuel Kitchen has officially declared himself God’s special envoy to Rome — all because the airlines wouldn’t cooperate.

Truly, the end times are upon us… or at least the Italian tourism season is.

Stay tuned for more divine travel updates.

LCG - Spiritually Deleaven Your Mind Just Like We As Ministers Do Daily

 

I feel sorry for the perpetually unfortunate souls at the Living Church of God—always landing squarely on the blacklist as such epic failures in literally everything they attempt. They're branded as covetous little lusters, overflowing with enough hate to fuel spontaneous outbursts that spark delightful divisions and endless contention throughout the ranks. But perish the thought that any of their ministers would ever stoop to such behavior! Heaven forbid.

This Passover season, the faithful are graciously instructed to sit down and dutifully scribble out a lengthy list of all their nasty attitudes and rotten behaviors that they simply must overcome in the coming year. Never mind that their spiritual slates were supposedly wiped sparkling clean on Passover night—apparently, divine forgiveness has an expiration date, and it's time for round two of self-flagellation.

LCG members must learn to forgive others exactly as the ministry so magnanimously does, while remaining eternally thankful for Christ's sacrifice.

Doug Winnail warns LCG members to eliminate their spiritual leaven. He says, the Scriptures command us to remove all leaven from our homes before the Days of Unleavened Bread and to avoid eating any during that time (Exodus 12:15). But let's be honest—this is merely a quaint physical ritual designed to remind us of the far more critical task: identifying and purging the spiritual leaven from our lives. You know, charming little sins like lusting, coveting, hating, throwing fits of wrath, sowing seeds of division and contention, peddling personal doctrinal heresies, chasing selfish ambitions, and all those other delightful ways we compromise with or outright rebel against God's commandments (Galatians 5:19–21).

As we plod through the Days of Unleavened Bread, we should earnestly beg God to spotlight every last bit of this spiritual leaven lurking in our souls so we can eliminate it. Writing out a handy list of attitudes and behaviors to conquer in the coming year is just the motivational tool we need to try extra hard this time. And while we're at it, let's be forgiving of others—just like the ministry models so perfectly—and stay oh-so-thankful for the sacrifice Jesus Christ made so we could be forgiven.

The exquisite irony. Year after year, the same leadership that can't seem to avoid scandals, splits, and internal drama lectures the rank-and-file about purging "outbursts of wrath," "sowing division," and "selfish ambitions"—sins that somehow never seem to stick to those at the top. Their slate gets "wiped clean" at Passover, yet the membership is immediately handed homework to list all their failures again, as if true forgiveness comes with an annual performance review attached. It's almost as if the real spiritual leaven isn't the average member's bad attitude... but the endless cycle of control, finger-pointing, and selective amnesia coming from the pulpit.

One can only hope that next year, the ministry might take a moment to apply that same list to themselves. Now that would be a profitable Holy Day indeed.

Eliminating Spiritual Leaven: The Scriptures tell us that leaven is to be removed from our homes prior to the Days of Unleavened Bread and not eaten during those days (Exodus 12:15). However, this is just a physical exercise to help us understand the importance of identifying and eliminating spiritual leaven from our lives, which includes lusting, coveting, hating, outbursts of wrath, sowing seeds of division and contention, promoting personal doctrinal heresies, pursuing selfish ambitions, and other examples of compromising on or rebelling against the commandments of God (Galatians 5:19–21). As we go through the Days of Unleavened Bread, we should ask God to show us spiritual leaven that we need to eliminate from our lives. Writing out a list of attitudes or behaviors to overcome in the coming year can help us to make a greater effort to eliminate these sins. Let’s also be forgiving of others and thankful for the sacrifice that Jesus Christ made for us so we can be forgiven.
Have a profitable Holy Day period,
Douglas S. Winnail

PCG's Andrew Locher Has Died

Keeping Pope Gerry Comfortable In His Lifestyle 

as he spreads the Gospel message through Irish dance.

One of their most dedicated Gestapo-style tithing agents that the Philadelphia Church of God has ever produced has finally shuffled off this mortal coil. For years, this paragon of piety was held up as a shining example: a relentless enforcer who demanded that struggling members cough up their tithes even when they could barely feed their own families. After all, in this glorious dispensation, God's top priority is clearly keeping the Flurry family living in the lap of luxury. Why let pesky little details like rent, groceries, or basic human decency get in the way of divine favor?

Money, it seems, is the true beating heart of the Philadelphia Church of God. They piously claim it's all about "getting the Gospel message out," but let's be real: it's first, foremost, and almost exclusively for the exclusive enrichment of the Flurry dynasty and their ever-expanding brood of offspring, who coast through life on the backs of faithful members' hard-earned tithes and offerings.

Just look at the lavish perks: a private jet for globe-trotting in style, a traveling Celtic dance troupe (because nothing says "end-time warning message" like fancy footwork), state-of-the-art dance studios, an extravagant office setup in Jerusalem, a moldy old house in England they're still desperately trying to unload, and those oh-so-cozy faculty homes on the Edmond cult compound—complete with cushy, high-paying salaries. Truly, the sacrifices of the brethren are making a real difference... for the inner circle.

And then there are the shameless money grabs disguised as sermons. Take Andrew Locher's April 2020 sermonette, for instance. Even as the world reeled from the pandemic, he had the audacity to pressure brethren to keep giving to "the church" despite having next to nothing left. How touching—especially after the organization had already pocketed $1.1 million in U.S. government relief funds, thanks to their convenient nonprofit status. Yet in the same breath, they love to berate and label government leaders as modern-day Jeroboams destined to evict them, while hypocritically comparing their own situation to the Israelites plundering the Egyptians. What a pathetic display of selective biblical amnesia.

Fast-forward to July 2022, and Locher was at it again with his sermon "Keep the Father First." He droned on (and on) about tithing, using the economic collapse in Sri Lanka as a heart-wrenching example. Brethren there were apparently scraping by just to put food on the table, but no worries—God (or rather, the PCG "Government") still needed their tithes most of all. He made a special point of assuring everyone that, as far as he knew, the church didn't have a "tithing problem." Of course, only God truly knows... though it's funny how the actual CFO seems to struggle with basic accounting and forecasting. Even funnier: when they catch someone skimping on tithes, they suspend them faster than you can say "stealing from God." (Oops, I mean from the Flurrys.)

A quick glance at the UK financial accounts tells its own story—the "tithe of the tithe" came in at a mere 8k when it should have been closer to 37k based on second tithes. But who cares about numbers when the Spirit is moving? On a side note, one does wonder who those mysterious "other creditors" are—the ones owed a cool £3.17 million. Just a minor detail, I'm sure.

Meanwhile, members were treated to the usual sermons and Bible studies on "sacrifice" and "financially doing our part"—the standard guilt-inducing dribble. All this while learning that the shiny new archaeology building in Jerusalem sits in one of the city's most affluent neighborhoods, right near the Prime Minister and President's residences. They're locked into a three-year lease (never mind that pesky upcoming Tribulation). The site hasn't been used in six years, so they're shipping over "volunteers" (slaves... erm, students) to handle the grunt work, while still needing professional builders for the heavy lifting. And the kicker? The dig only covers the period from 400 AD to 1400 AD—hardly the ancient Israelite golden age they idolize. It's all a elaborate sham to prop up their Herbert W. Armstrong worship and keep the cash flowing.

In the end, the Philadelphia Church of God stands as a masterclass in religious grift: a polished operation that preaches sacrifice and impending doom while its leaders enjoy every earthly comfort the tithe-payers can fund. They demand loyalty, obedience, and open wallets from the faithful, all while building personal empires under the guise of "God's Work." One can only hope that more members will eventually open their eyes to the irony—and the exploitation—before another generation is bled dry in service to a family that long ago forgot the difference between ministry and monarchy. After all, if tithing truly were about pleasing God, wouldn't the fruits look a little less like luxury real estate and a little more like genuine care for the flock? What a divine comedy indeed.

From The Exit and Support Network

Shameless Sermonette by Andrew Locher Exploits Members Financially:
April 27, 2020 

 

In the recent PCG sermonette Andrew Locher continues to ask brethren to give to the “church” despite having little. What a shameless organization that could still ask their lay members for more money when they have already received $1.1 million from the U.S. government, the reason being that they are a nonprofit. They continue to berate, criticize and even label this government leadership as Jeroboam who will evict them, yet had the audacity to compare their plight to the Israelites benefiting from the Egyptians. How pathetic. –sermonette critiqued by L. S.

Andrew Locher Sermon Was Recent Money Grab:
July 18, 2022 

 

In a recent sermon by Andrew Locher entitled “Keep the Father First” he rabbited on about tithing and how Sri Lanka is in the midst of turmoil and that brethren there are struggling financially to just put food on the table but how important it is to pay your tithes (especially those that are struggling–because you know God doesn’t need the money, the “Government” [in PCG] does). 

 

He made a special point that, as far as he knows, the PCG doesn’t have a tithing problem, only God knows. (Yes, the actual CFO apparently doesn’t understand basic accounting forecasting. But funnily enough, when they find that someone isn’t paying tithes, they suspend them immediately from stealing from them…oops, I mean stealing from God). However, even looking at only the UK Financial Accounts [see July 9 letter above] we can see there is an issue as the Tithe of the Tithe is definitely not 10% of 2nd Tithes (it was only 8k but should have been closer to 37k). 

 

Also, on a side note, I would love to know who the “other creditors” are that are owed 3.17m–but I digress. 

 

We had sermons/Bible studies on “sacrifice” and “financially doing our part,” etc., and all the normal dribble, just to find out the new Archeology building that is in Jerusalem is in the most affluent part of the city; i.e., near the PM and president’s abode and that they are committing to a 3 year lease. (what about the Tribulation?) The property has not been used in 6 years so they are sending over slaves…erm I mean students to do all the manual work but it will still need builders, etc., to do the majority of the work. This dig isn’t about God’s Work at all as the era that they are digging is only from 400 AD to 1400 AD. It is all a sham to bolster their HWA idol worshipping! I am so over it!!! –[name withheld]

Andrew Locher Is Definitely Not a Good Person!
August 14, 2024 

 

I wanted to write in response to C. P. [see 8-12-24 letter] who wrote about Trisha Locher dying. He mentioned that Locher” seemed like a good person” and “one of the better ones at HQ.” He definitely is no such thing! His MO is to come across as a kind, meek, and humble man. In reality he is none of those things. It is a facade that he wears well. I’ve personally known him since 1993. He has been in the upper rankings and operations of the PCG for a very long time. He is well aware of and fully participates in all the underhanded, manipulative tactics that are used in controlling the membership. As many people know, this is often cruel and rarely if ever has the person’s best interest in mind. It’s always to get money and/or control for the benefit of 1st, the Flurrys and 2nd, the organization. Locher is the CFO. He knows things! Just ask him why Richard Williams quit as the CFO many years ago! (Richard could not in good conscience and legally work their books the way Stephen and Gerald Flurry wanted him to, so he quit and is now CFO of a tire company and fairly successful). This is when Locher took over the church’s (PCG’s) finances. And he knows, according to the UK charity commission, 0.06% is the TOTAL expenditure given for financial support to those in need; 0.06% of their total UK and European income is all they give to help people, as of 2021. Unfortunately, I cannot get these number for the USA as it is not public knowledge as it is in the UK. (See Five year PCG UK Financial Review, posted on this site June 2, 2023) 

 

Andrew Locher directly assists people in setting up their estates in back-handed ways, so they can’t be challenged by family members. This, of course, is done after the usually elderly or sick person is manipulated in leaving everything to the PCG and none to family who are not members of the “church” (PCG). He instructs them on how to remove assets outside of the will/living trusts jurisdiction. Ultimately usurping the Biblical admonition to leave your children and children’s children an inheritance. I, unfortunately, have first hand experience with this. 

 

Locher also knows full well that members are not healed, nor can he site a tangible case of it. He knew his wife was going to die if she didn’t seek medical treatment! He undoubtedly encouraged her to keep the faith and rely on God to heal her, as all members are told in such a situation. If she didn’t, it would have been a colossal embarrassment to Locher and the other ministers. So does Andrew Locher sound like a good human being, let alone a Christian, one of God’s “chosen few”? –-R. M. (former PCG member)

Gerald Flurry and Cal Culpepper On The Caves Of Adullam

 

The caves of Adullam

Gerald Flurry and Cal Culpepper have been regaling their followers with their latest masterpiece of delusional prophecy for quite some time now.

These two towering intellectual giants have solemnly declared that the Caves of Adullam — you know, those charming, damp, bat-infested holes where David once hid like a fugitive — will serve as the exclusive, five-star Place of Safety for the Philadelphia Church of God’s oh-so-special, spiritually spotless elite.

Because heaven forbid Flurry’s pure, superior, hand-selected remnant should have to rub shoulders in Petra with all those filthy, Laodicean, half-baked COG rejects, Protestant losers, certain Messianic Jews, and other assorted spiritual trash. The very idea is simply too horrifying for words!

No, no — his precious snowflakes deserve their very own private, members-only cave system. After all, when you’re running God’s One True Work, and you alone have the “correct” understanding, you can’t possibly be expected to share end-time real estate with the great unwashed masses. That would be... egalitarian. Or worse — common.

So while the rest of the COG world and others crowd into Petra like desperate end-time tourists, Flurry’s enlightened few will be huddling in their own deluxe, divinely appointed rock holes — where the caves are drafty, the ambiance is biblical, and the exclusivity is second to none.

Truly, the height of end-time spiritual sophistication.

Truly, nothing says “God’s favored remnant” quite like demanding your own private apocalyptic bunker because sharing is for lesser Christians.

From The Exit and Support Network 

In The New Throne of David by Gerald Flurry (copyright 2018/2021) he said the place of safety was in Adullam. “We must be prepared to go to the cave of Adullam, the place of safety.” (Chapter 2: The New Throne of David, p. 25.) However, he is still telling members that Petra is the place of safety. 

 

One Way Ticket? 

 

In a June 2013 sermon Cal Culpepper (“Come Out of This World”)13 stated, “Do we really think it is going to be that easy? There’s a lot of details that we don’t know yet. We are going to be packing our bags–it will be an act of faith. We don’t know how it will be. Maybe the government will give us a one way ticket.” 

 

So now we need to ask another question: 

 

Do we think the government is actually going to let Gerald Furry leave the country with a bunch of money? Even if he tries to place it all in offshore accounts, wouldn’t he be watched? (More extreme, fanatical groups are being watched today since the Jim Jones and David Koresh tragedies.) 

 

We need to realize that these stories members are hearing about HQs fleeing “first,” or skipping the country and leaving the members behind, usually turn out to be lies or wild guesses, or a rumor handed down from someone higher up the pyramid.14 

PCG believes they will be persecuted in the future. They believe “the Work” will finally end and armies will surround Jerusalem. It is at this time that they believe it will be time to “flee.”15 Herbert Armstrong preached this same fear doctrine for decades. No one ever fled anywhere. Members simply continued to pay in more and more money, as PCG members are doing. 

 

No One Fled Anywhere: 

 

HWA, for decades, predicted end-time scenarios and talked of a “place of safety.” When every one of his WW II prophecies failed, he said his “timing was wrong” but they would be fulfilled in the “next war”–WW III. In the meantime he convinced his co-workers and members that a college needed to be built. When his later prophecies also failed–especially the 1972 one–he merely said God had given them “more time to do the Work” and shifted their attention. Flurry will undoubtedly say something similar. 

 

As Gerald Flurry continues to use the “place of safety” ploy the same way HWA did, members will fear to leave PCG lest they be left to go through the Great Tribulation. Leaving PCG, in their minds, is the same as “leaving God.” Flurry tells them, “Fear of God must always be with us.”16 But this is the wrong kind of fear. It is the fear of a man whom they are unknowingly putting between themselves and the Lord Jesus Christ. They do not know they have been deceived, as countless thousands before them were deceived by the false teacher and false prophet Herbert Armstrong. 

 

By D. M. Williams
Exit & Support Network™
December 2, 2005
Updated June 30, 2021; March 19, 2024; December 3, 2024

Galatians

Paul writing to Galatia

 

Palm Sunday

 

The scene depicts crowds welcoming Jesus by spreading their cloaks and palm branches on the road while waving palms and shouting "Hosanna!" (meaning "save now" or "save us, we pray") and "Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord!" (quoting Psalm 118:25–26). Jesus rode a young donkey (or colt), fulfilling the prophecy in Zechariah 9:9: "See, your king comes to you, righteous and victorious, lowly and riding on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a donkey."

Key Symbols and Their Meanings

Palm branches

• In ancient Jewish and Greco-Roman culture, palms represented victory, triumph, peace, and joy. Victors in athletic games or military conquerors were often honored with palm branches.
• The crowds waved and laid them down as a sign of homage and celebration, treating Jesus like a king or conquering hero. They expressed hope that He would deliver them—likely expecting political or national liberation from Roman rule.
• In Christian interpretation, the palms point to Jesus' ultimate spiritual victory over sin and death through His Passion, death, and resurrection. They foreshadow the "Paschal victory" (Easter triumph). Blessed palms are often kept in homes as sacramentals—a reminder of faith in Christ as the Messianic King—and some traditions burn the previous year's palms to create ashes for Ash Wednesday.

The donkey (or colt)

• Unlike a warhorse (symbol of conquest and military power), a donkey symbolized humility, peace, meekness, and servanthood. In ancient Near Eastern tradition, kings rode horses into battle but donkeys when coming in peace.
• By choosing this humble animal, Jesus presented Himself as the Prince of Peace and a servant king, not a political or military ruler. This act deliberately fulfilled Zechariah's prophecy, publicly declaring His messianic identity while contrasting with expectations of a warrior Messiah.
• The donkey also evokes themes of burden-bearing and gentle strength, mirroring Jesus' mission to serve and save spiritually rather than through earthly power.

"Hosanna!" and the crowds' actions

• The shouts combined praise with a plea for salvation. Spreading cloaks was a royal gesture of honor (similar to coronations in the Old Testament, like 2 Kings 9:13).
• The moment highlights a tension: the crowds acclaimed Jesus as the "Son of David" and king, but many misunderstood His kingdom as earthly and political. Jesus came to establish a spiritual kingdom through sacrifice, not immediate national deliverance. This sets up the dramatic shift later in the week, when some of the same crowds (or others) cried "Crucify him!"

Spreading cloaks on the ground

Spreading garments was a known act of royal homage and submission in ancient Jewish (and broader Near Eastern) culture. It treated the person as a king. The clearest Old Testament parallel is 2 Kings 9:13, where people spread their cloaks on the steps for Jehu when he was proclaimed king.

With the cloaks and the palms, these actions created an impromptu “red carpet” — an improvised royal welcome — as the crowd acclaimed Jesus as the “Son of David” and “King of Israel.”

Broader Significance

Palm Sunday captures a beautiful irony: a day of joyful welcome that foreshadows suffering. The palms and cheers represent human hopes for a triumphant Messiah, while the donkey and the events that follow reveal Jesus' path of humble obedience, leading to the cross. Christians see it as an invitation to welcome Jesus as King—not on our terms, but as the Savior who brings true peace and eternal victory.

From Broken Stones to Living Faith: Righteousness Under the New Covenant"

 

From Broken Stones to Living Faith: Righteousness Under the New Covenant

By

The Silent Pilgrim

Samuel Kitchen posted a letter to his scattered followers, 

and this is my response to it (his letter is at the end).

The statement mixes some biblical truths (righteousness comes by faith in God/Christ, not self-boasting works; the Spirit—not our strength—empowers obedience; sin is serious and calls for quick repentance; faith produces living evidence) with several clear errors when measured against the New Covenant as taught in the New Testament. The New Covenant (promised in Jeremiah 31:31-34 and fulfilled in Jesus) is not a revised version of the Old Covenant/Mosaic Law with "faith added on." It is a fundamentally better covenant (Hebrews 8:6-13) where:

• God writes His law internally on hearts and minds by the Holy Spirit (not external stone tablets or ritual observance).
• Justification and freedom from condemnation come by grace through faith in Christ's finished work alone.
• The Old Covenant system (including its ceremonial commands) is obsolete and fulfilled in Christ.

Here is why key parts of the statement contradict this, with direct scriptural grounding:

"If we sin we are judged of the law of God!" (and the idea that sin makes our righteousness "worthless" or puts us back under law's judgment)

This is the core error. The New Covenant explicitly declares believers not under the law's dominion or condemnation.

• Romans 6:14: "For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace."
• Romans 8:1-2: "There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death."
• Galatians 5:18: "But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law."

Christ bore the full curse and penalty of the law (Galatians 3:13; Romans 7:6). Sin still grieves the Spirit, requires repentance, and can bring discipline (Hebrews 12:5-11; 1 John 1:9), but it does not return us to law-based judgment or make our standing in Christ "worthless." The New Covenant promise is that God "will remember their sins and lawless deeds no more" (Hebrews 8:12; 10:17). The statement's logic—that ongoing sin (which all believers still experience—1 John 1:8) nullifies righteousness unless perfectly faith-powered—actually undermines assurance in Christ and revives the very condemnation the cross removed.

Keeping the Sabbath, Holy Days of God, tithing, etc., as part of "keeping the law" that strengthens faith or avoids being "breakers of the law"

The New Covenant does not bind believers to these Old Covenant shadows. They pointed to Christ but are no longer required observances:

• Colossians 2:16-17: "Therefore let no one pass judgment on you in questions of food and drink, or with regard to a festival or a new moon or a Sabbath. These are a shadow of the things to come, but the substance belongs to Christ."
• Romans 14:5-6: "One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind."
• Hebrews 8:13: "In speaking of a new covenant, he makes the first one obsolete."

The Jerusalem Council (Acts 15) confirmed that Gentile believers (and by extension the church) are not placed under the Mosaic Law's ceremonial requirements. Tithing was part of Israel's theocratic system; the New Testament shifts giving to cheerful, Spirit-led generosity (2 Corinthians 9:7). The statement treats these as ongoing "law" that faith must uphold or be judged by—this is exactly what Paul warned against as a return to "weak and worthless elementary principles" (Galatians 4:9; 5:1-4).

"Our righteousness is good works proclaimed and boasted while sinning... Faithless and dead" combined with "Righteousness is of faith. It is not of works" and the reward framework.

This creates an internal contradiction that the New Covenant resolves. Yes—righteousness is of faith, not our works (Ephesians 2:8-9; Romans 3:28; Philippians 3:9—"not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ"). Our attempts at self-righteousness are worthless (Isaiah 64:6). But the New Covenant does not say "if you sin at all, your faith-righteousness collapses and you're judged by the law."

• Good works (love, obedience, fruit of the Spirit—Galatians 5:22-23) are the evidence and result of living faith (James 2:14-26; Ephesians 2:10—"created in Christ Jesus for good works"). They do not "strengthen" faith to avoid law-judgment; the Spirit does the empowering (Philippians 2:13).
• Rewards in the New Covenant are for faithfulness done in Christ (1 Corinthians 3:10-15; Matthew 25), not for "doing what we ought" under law or to prove we "cannot be condemned by the law." The statement's tension ("we are not justified by works... but if we sin we are judged of the law") revives the very self-righteous boasting it claims to reject.

Minor strengths that still miss the New Covenant's heart

Parts like "Christ in us who doeth them," "by the Spirit of God," quick repentance, and thanking God for exposing sin align with New Covenant reality (Galatians 2:20; Romans 8:9-11; 1 John 1:9). The "mind of Christ" is indeed humble and receptive. However, these are framed inside a system that still treats believers as partially under the Old Covenant's external law-structure for judgment and righteousness. That framework was nailed to the cross (Colossians 2:14).

In summary, the New Covenant is grace-based freedom from the law's curse and ceremonial yoke, with the Spirit producing internal obedience that looks like love for God and neighbor—not ritual law-keeping to "strengthen faith" or avoid being "judged of the law." The statement's view, while sincere, functionally pulls believers back under the Old Covenant's shadow instead of resting fully in the substance, which is Christ. This is why Paul so strongly opposed any mixture of law and grace for justification or daily walk (Galatians 1:6-9; 3:1-5).

The goal of the New Covenant is joyful freedom in Christ, not fear of law-judgment.

Samuel Kitchen's letter to his followers:

If God commands us not to sin, and we sin still, our righteousness is worthless because it was not of faith.

Meaning, we may keep the sabbath of the Lord, the Holy Days of God, tithe of all, be hospitable, and keep the law….but if we sin we are judged of the law of God!

Righteousness is of faith. It is not of works.

Our works strengthen faith, showing it is alive, for if we disobey God how can we believe God in faith? Sin is a lack of faith and sin weakens faith.

Our righteousness, is good works proclaimed and boasted while sinning against God. Faithless and dead.

The righteousness of God is believing God, and knowing He is able to perform what He says! And through obedience, we strengthen faith. Knowing God is a rewarder to those who both do good and evil.

We are not justified by boasting or self righteousness. We are not justified by our works, for we all are sinners. But if we believe God let us believe in faith, and let us strengthen one another in faith, and loosen the chains of darkness that easily beset us.

For we cannot do the works that strengthen faith. But it is Christ in us who doeth them. Therefore it is not ourselves who strengthen faith, but Christ in us. And it is God who gives us living faith, and living faith is strengthened and powered by the spirit of God, through which Christ lives in us.

Not by our own hands, might, ability, strength, I.Q, and works.

But by the Spirit of God.

So when sin is revealed, let us not turn our heads away, for we strive always to walk and to live by the living faith of Jesus Christ. Let us repent quickly, of allowing Satan to weaken faith through disobedience, and therefore by repentance turn to God wholly and being strengthened thoroughly filled with the Holy Spirit. The mind of Christ is not hostile, angry or bitter against God for exposing sin. When sin is exposed, let us thank God. For it is HIS GOOD WORK for our sake to walk in faith and be rewarded according to our faith.

We do not get rewarded for doing the things which we ought. We are rewarded according to doing which we ought in faith, not in self righteousness, not as breakers of the law but those who cannot be condemned by the law.

Church of God International - The Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego Song - Fire Proof Faith

Church of God International: Passover Rap - Jesus Is Our Passover King

 

Crackpot Prophet On Stay At Home Passover Keeping

One thing you do have to hand to Herbert Armstrong is that he genuinely appreciated quality. Whether it was in his personal home, the beautifully maintained college campus, its facilities, or the polished visual presentation of Church of God speakers and television backgrounds, the man insisted on excellence. Almost every COG splinter group has carried at least some of that commitment to quality forward into their video programs and public image.

Well… almost every group.

Enter our most highly favored Crackpot Bob.

For the last thirteen years, the very concept of “quality” appears to have never once crossed his mind. His videos are a visual trainwreck: crooked bookcases, bizarrely arranged books, random doorknobs hovering behind his head, file cabinets, and perpetually creased banners. The clutter is every bit as distracting as his constant arm-waving and hyperactive bouncing in that oversized leather chair.

And here we are, just days away from the most sacred observance of the year for Armstrongists, and our bouncing, flouncing prophet has delivered yet another banger. While solemnly lecturing his dwindling band of faithful on how to properly observe Passover at home, viewers are treated to a glorious, wide-open view straight into his closet — proudly displaying his impressive collection of magic, holistic  and overpriced ju-ju pills.

Quality all the way, folks. Truly inspiring.