Today's UCG Resignations 1/4/2011

"Sometimes in life there is NOTHING left to do but have a good laugh (or cry)."

I have watched, listened and participated in the WCG/COG perspectives since I was 14 years old.  I was a minister for 26 of those years. I am now 60.  Life seems to last only about 15 minutes which I did not know when 14.  And while I am more known for my writings on topics on abusive religion, ministers and churches, or taking another look at the real origins of anything from the Bible to human origins, my heart goes out to all of you as you watch your organization implode, once again.

"

Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at this moment.

Always say “yes” to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to what already is? what could be more insane than to oppose life itself, which is now and always now? Surrender to what is. Say “yes” to life — and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you."

Eckhart Tolle

I knew the vast majority of the full time ministers in all the COG's when they were just kids. You know, the "wasn't that just 15 minutes ago?" thing.  We had a lot of fun together not knowing what the future would have in store for all of us who went into the ministry, sincerely and with great hope of being in the right place, teaching and believing the right things, the right way in the right Church.  Phew....what a ride. A few of them, mostly those who are now their own one man show, seem to show signs of mental and personality disorders that can more easily hidden in a ministry as quirkiness and narcissism in religion looks more like sincerity and how most of the characters in the Bible acted.  Don't be fooled. It's still a personality disorder by modern standards and some, perhaps don't need more followers but rather medication.

 I see these kids and friends, now old or at least older and think, "If I only knew then what I know now."  But that's not how it works.  We say that experience is the best teacher but the tuition is high.  Let me tell you, experience is the ONLY teacher and the rest is all hearsay.  

"What is....is"

"We're all here to learn."

"Welcome to Earth School"

Since being terminated 12 years ago, ( I wanted to be but didn't know how to leave my congregation of wonderful friends behind or even what to do with my life now), I have had to face many things. I have made mistakes in processing the experience. It brought me anxiety, repressed anger which leads to depression and a boatload of doubt and "what's next?"  I stomped my feet in ways that didn't help and was divorced.  I have made a few but lost most friends.  Since sarcasm is anger turned sideways, I wrote sarcastically to put a sharp edge on my experiences and new perspectives.  I have learned that most depression is anger that you feel you have no right to express, (a common feeling with ministers towards HQ) or that doing so will exact a price too high to pay. (also a proven truth )

 You will go through the same things because what is happening is no small thing.

"If you understand, then things are as they are.  If you don't understand..then things are as they are."

Perhaps a little advice based on experience of loss and dis-illusionment.  Actually disillusionment is a good thing for why would we want to have illusions...?

First of all...Breathe.   You can't fix it all and you won't solve it all.  All you can do is be yourself and follow the path you feel you have to be on.  See where it goes.  

Secondly...Step outside the box of having just one source, leader, group, organization, minister or ideas about how it all is.  There are bigger boxes of truth and reality than those defined by the COG's or any religion.  They are mere sign posts along the way but a sign post is not the same as the destination.  It just points the direction and sometimes they get pointed in the wrong direction by pranksters.

Thirdly...Don't read your Bible too much. You'll never be able to process this doing that.  Everyone does that so no one can find a reason to drop their guard, share the experience as it really is and give each other a really big hug.  It divides.  As I have noted, the COG's add to themselves by subtraction and multiply by division.  I would encourage the COG administrations, boards, councils and humans to have a big meeting, not just for those that agree with them but for everyone.  Just be there and start with a big hug.  Let your tears flow and keep looking each other in the eye until you realize one of Buddhisms great observations...(The narcissists and those with genuine personality disorders will not be able to do this so don't expect it.)

"Sometimes in life there is NOTHING left to do but have a good laugh."

(or cry)

I'm not really here to give advice, just observations of what, to me that journey from age 14 to 60 so far has taught me.  Some would say I have learned nothing, but they are very very wrong.  I would love to speak to those who have had their hearts and hopes handed to them over the years in a paper bag with a pat on the head and a hearty "be warmed and be filled, we'll be praying for you."  They aren't.  They just say that.  I miss teaching and speaking what seems to me to be a better form of "the truth."  

I'd also like to say, that in my experience, Denny Luker is probably one of the most  sincere and kind humans beings I have ever me.   I know he is not sleeping.  If he reads this...Denny, don't put the ice cream in the cupboard to hid it from your wife when she caught you pacing the kitchen when WCG was imploding..  :)  I remember the details of your last round of this!

 I KNOW he has no idea where and how this all has come from and what the hell has happened.  We were great friends at one time and are not at this point only due to time and distance.  I would however love to have a chat with him about letting people be themselves and that "we all need to speak the same thing," is neither true nor possible.  Where two are three are gathered together, in reality, we have two or three different ways of filtering our world, life and experiences.  And it's ok....

My heart is with you though I don't believe as I once did.  My heart is with most pastors who were friends and probably can't eat very well, sleep very well and wonder what's going to happen to them personally as this unfolds.  They are losing their friends and having great anxiety or not depending.  I don't miss it.  But I do understand it.   My heart is with the member who agonizes over why church has to be so hard and drama ridden.  Their are reasons, but I'll save that for another time. 

In my opinion, this is the overall problem we all face  in this life of thinking we have to find the one true church, truth, doctrine, interpretation and reality amongst all of the chaff.  In real church history, there never was one true church. Before the body of Jesus cooled, the struggle over who understood it all had divided up nicely and would only get worse.  I won't show you the proof in this letter, but Peter really hated Paul and Paul really disliked Peter, James and John.  He called them "reputed pillars" and then bragged he learned "nothing from them..."  wow!  Luke made fun of Peter, as did John who thought that denying and betraying were the same. He always refers to Peter along side a comment about Judas. There was a reason for that.  There is truly nothing new under the sun of pastoral/member relations.

However....

"Identification with your mind creates an opaque screen of concepts, labels, images, words, judgments, and definitions that blocks all true relationship. It comes between you and yourself, between you and your fellow man and woman, between you and nature, between you and God. It is this screen of thought that creates the illusion of separateness, the illusion that there is you and a totally separate "other." You then forget the essential fact that, underneath the level of physical appearances and separate forms, you are one with all that is."

Amen....

Sincerely

DenniscDiehl@aol.com