Monday, September 26, 2022

Dave Pack Continues His Desperate Scrambling To Be Right


 

Desperate Scrambling

 

It was obvious that Pastor General David C. Pack of The Restored Church of God had a big breakfast this morning because he still had egg all over his face.

 

Instead of walking up to the lectern, declaring “April fools!” and then stepping down, Dave repeated history with his laughable “Special Comments” which were basically, “There was something WE missed. It happens at sundown somewhere in the world tonight.”

 

Pulease.

 

I would like to request that either The Meat Shield or The Coffee Kid please cut out Habakkuk and Zechariah from Dave’s Bible. Those books do absolutely no good for your boss.

 

I commented this morning on the Banned by HWA website predicting the spin Dave would grasp on to today. He did not disappoint. It is freaky how I have that guy figured out.

 

For the skimmers: Jesus Christ was supposed to arrive today at sunrise in Jerusalem, which would have been 5:30am eastern time. Dave "discovered" late last night that He will not arrive reckoned by Jerusalem time but by Joseph time (the United States and Canada). It will still be Trumpets in the west when sundown strikes Wadsworth, Ohio, at 7:17pm.

 

 

Being more than a blogger now, I feel a particular responsibility as a Restored Church of God chronicler; a whistleblower that gives commentary with a humorous slant, but also fact-based news reporting.

 

Due to this, I do my best to analyze events in a timely fashion.

 

When these “Special Comments” were posted, I was faced with the reality that if I wanted to get anything posted before the sunset deadline Dave set during the 20-minute excuse-rich blather, I would have to change my evening dinner plans which were made days ago.

 

I decided that I was not going to alter my schedule due to the erratic (if not predictable) nature of David C. Pack. I spent years in The Restored Church of God changing my plans (along with the whole Headquarters congregation) because “Mr. Pack” whatever. Those days are over.

 

So, you are reading this well after the sunset deadline because I opted to have dinner with a friend and thumb my nose at Dave's nonsense. Of course, his new idea was going to fail.

 

The man is destined to fail in all his prophetic endeavors.

 

 

Breaking the usual format, here are a string of quotes that tell the story:

 

"Two choices: It's too late for this year, or WE missed something.”

 

“Habakkuk 2:3. A truly enigmatic statement…and, suddenly, God gave me that corroboration.

 

And as I was sitting, and eventually it got toward 2 o'clock, and I was pondering this, not because I any longer believed it was gonna be last night…”

 

Sounds like Dave was up until at least 2am last night. The man is not getting enough sleep.

 

“…and I finally figured out…”

 

“…‘rush that calls it out.’ So, I’m still calling it out, by the way.”

 

“What is that moad? Well, we now know it’s the Feast of Trumpets.”

 

That tune will change starting tomorrow.

 

“There’s a delay.”

 

“…after I noticed a verse we had never seen before in the light that we will.”

 

Dave only preaches darkness. His teachings are not of the light.

 

“…look at something we never saw.”

 

“But, what we read over and over again, and never saw for what it meant…

 

Zechariah 14:6-7 bitch-slaps Dave with some new truth.

 

“…they tell you how and when everything begins.”

 

Until Tishrei 2. When the prophetic blueprint needs to be redesigned. Oh yeah, that is tomorrow.

 

“When does that happen? And here’s the plain answer. Impossible to argue with.

And it absolutely qualifies and agrees with Habakkuk 2:3.”

 

“…at evening time…dusk…sunset…extremity…now, that’s powerful.”

 

"So, it wouldn't turn on sundown or dusk in Jerusalem. It would have to be some later place."

 

“Jerusalem saw that the Feast of Trumpets disappear at 11:30 this morning.

And I knew they would.

 

This contradicts what he told the church on Saturday night. Dave was right about being wrong again. Sad.

 

“7:17pm…if it’s here.”

 

“But fortunately, I figured this out late last night.

 

All the best biblical knowledge manifests around 2am. That is when a sound mind is at its strongest, right Dave?

 

A few minutes ago, God gave this information to him. But now he figured it out. Interesting.

 

“Over in Zechariah 1…a series of eight visions that all appeared…

as happening in the shade. I never understood it.

 

In the winter of 2019, Dave was utterly fixated with darkness and night and winter. He went through the first half of the book of Zechariah line by line because RCG was experiencing winter. Not figuratively, but the actual season.

 

He revisits those same ideas as if he had never taught that concept before. Maybe if he got more sleep, he would have remembered this is recycled material. The Meat Shield…well, shielded Dave from the embarrassment. The Coffee Kid kept his lips sealed. The Enabler-in-Chief just nodded.

 

“I do the best I can…maybe God wants this as a record.

 

That would make me a scribe. And I believe God wants this to be recorded for all to see. These futile and pointless twenty minutes broadcast to all the members of The Restored Church of God that David C. Pack is a prophetic fraud.

 

“Maybe this is the very last day of my voice when I’m about to sound in four hours.

 

I am transcribing this quote at 10:17pm. I laughed out loud.

 

“I do not believe for a split second we’re gonna go next year.”

 

It's not Jerusalem, and I knew it, and I sat with the ministers this morning. We were all convicted about it. I said, ‘You’re gonna watch 11:30 pass…in Jerusalem…it can’t be.’”

 

I said that too. What does that say about me? An antichrist serpent more wicked almost than the devil knew Trumpets would come and go in Jerusalem with nothing occurring. A week before “God” revealed it to you. Why does that not fascinate anyone at Headquarters?

 

If you want to hire me back, Brad, I am willing to negotiate.

 

Dave fills the rest of his time with a Queen Elizabeth / Queen Victoria story about how they knew they were descended from King David.

 

 

Special Comments. The end.

 

Sunset came to Wadsworth. Sunset came to California. Maybe something biblical will happen on Maui in three more hours.

 

I will be asleep by then, but I suspect Dave will be pacing a bald spot in his carpet, waiting for inspiration from “God” to come in the wee hours of the night as it did for Nostradamus. You should start staring at a bowl of water, Dave. Maybe then one of your goofy ideas will pan out.

 

Brad and his wife will be giggling themselves to sleep, coming up with ideas for what excuses Dave will dream up next.

 

When he walks into your office tomorrow, Brad, just take a deep breath and try not to laugh.

 

It is a special day when you can wake up to David C. Pack failing before your first cup of coffee and then go to dinner as David C. Pack fails the same day again just in time for dessert. That is a remarkable accomplishment, and we should all take note.

 

David “Passover” Pack, the Elijah, the Messenger to the Seventh Era, Joshua the High Priest, The Watchman, The Good and Faithful Servant, The Goodman of the House, the Porter who “rushes to call it out” while giving a final ration about the Feast of Trumpets.

 

The Price Is Right

Marc Cebrian

Why Jesus Has Still Not Shown Up In Wadsworth

 


Sunday, September 25, 2022

Dave Pack: "The sterling reputation of David C. Pack and the The Restored Church of God hinges on the events of Trumpets this year being accurate."

 


Dave Pack pulling failed prophecies out of his hat 
week after week


David C. Pack Mocks Himself

 

The powers that be at Headquarters in The Restored Church of God must have recited my article from yesterday because David C. Pack took the stage after dinner to power-sit, “The Greatest Unending Story! (Part 394).”

 

When I wrote, “If only there were time left in the current world for Part 394,” I was being sarcastic, fellas. Man, I need to be more cautious because they might be paying attention to what is posted here.

 

The Feast of Trumpets began in Jerusalem at 6:32pm, which translates to 11:32am Wadsworth time which translates to David C. Pack having a Super-Duper-Long-Day-of-Failure starting before this article is posted and lasting until 7:16pm Monday night.

 

By the time you read this, David C. Pack has already begun failing. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope tomorrow.

 

For those just tuning in, Dave has been blowing hot air for months about a Kingdom of God preceding the Feast of Trumpets. It was not quite 50 days. Then, a retroactive 45 days. Then, 30 days. 10 days. 9 days. (Have you spotted the trend yet?) 8 days. 7 days. 6 days. 3.5-ish days. – Then it all "became clear" that this "one month" is like Joshua's Long Day and happens ON Trumpets instead of before it.

 

I glossed over this part of the Friday night Pathetic Update in Member Services. Since Dave is making it a Thing now, it is worth sharing.

 

“The day—that day—the evil day—last day—great day—the day of trouble—day of rebuke—day of wrath—day of vengeance—day of visitation—day of Christ—day of the Lord—the end—the end of all things—the end of the world—the time—the year of visitation—the year of My redeemed—the year of recompenses—the acceptable year—are all different terms for one astonishing, very long day that is broken into what looks like separate days, but is not! Everything has to occur in one month.”

 

Dave uses the Bible like Felix the Cat’s Bag of Tricks. He reached in, pulled out Joshua and Zechariah, then origamied them into an entire month of events compressed into a single day: The Feast of Trumpets, which has already begun in Jerusalem.

 

Yeppers. All that business started a few hours ago.

 

Two objects cannot occupy the same space at the same time. But in the wacky world of David C. Pack, the Bible is an all-you-can-eat buffet of possibilities. And all the “ministers” at Headquarters agree? No way, JosĂ©.

 

Spoiler Alert: David C. Pack schools himself and admits some of his

own teachings “never made sense” and were “ridiculous.”

 

The sterling reputation of David C. Pack and the entire organization known as The Restored Church of God hinges on the events of Trumpets this year being accurate. Would God let Dave fail so spectacularly and publicly if he were a true apostle?

 

 

@ 00:06 We’re now in the shadow, literally, of the Feast of Trumpets.

@ 00:19 So, lemme use this term. “Time has grown serious.” It’s become now or wait a year. And I don’t believe for two seconds we’re gonna wait a year.

 

That is a significant update from seven days ago.

 

Part 393 – September 17

@ 35:47 If we got to Monday morning [September 19], we’re waiting another year


SFX - The Price Is Right

Sound effects have been added to enhance your Dave Pack learning experience.

 

And this is the guy that Brad, Ed, Jaco, Ryan, Ken, Tim, Carl, Andrew, Jim, Salasi, Frank, Mike, and Raymond want you to worship follow? Pulease.

 

@ 00:54 But eventually, there would come a message that would be right in the face of the arrival of God, right before this man sounds. There would be a ration, and the charge would be finished.

 

He is a super-fan of my website and keeps it flush with new content. I do appreciate the support, Dave.

 

@ 06:49 I could easily tonight go three or four hours on all I've learned since last Sabbath.

 

The silent, internal screams of “No!” from the entire Headquarters congregation shook my windows a mile away. Only Stepford Prime was disappointed that Dave did not go through with it.

 

@ 06:54 We had a riveting discussion on Thursday. Learning a mile a minute as we’re coming into Trumpets about how God never intended 10 days, or 7 days, or 3.5 days, or any days precede the Feast of Trumpets.He’s going to do everything in that one day of so many names.

 

David C. Pack does not consider the implications of his words. He condemns himself, and he condemns the enablers at Headquarters without intending to.

 

So, God “never intended” that you teach what you have for months? Hmmm. Interesting.

 

Why did you do it, then? What spirit was driving you if it was not God? What put those ideas in your head and made the teaching FEEL like it was from God? What other things are you teaching that you FEEL are from God but are not? How often can you be so utterly wrong about God's plan, admit that to the church, but still believe God is guiding you?

 

It was not all clear before Part 394, but now it is? Pulease.

 

David C. Pack, when will you begin to question whether or not you serve the true God at all? I do not think you can. I think that is impossible for you. You have crossed the event horizon and can never return to being a true minister of Jesus Christ.



SFX - The Price Is Right

To the “ministers” at Headquarters:

 

Your Pastor General just admitted (again) that he was teaching what God “never intended.”

 

Brad, Ed, Jaco, Ryan, Ken, Tim, Carl, Andrew, Jim, Salasi, Frank, Mike, and Raymond…You all agreed with concepts that God never intended. Perhaps you are all not as close to God as you believe.

 

This is a logic puzzle you cannot crack.

 

Dave taught X. You all agreed with X. Dave declared X is not of God. Since Dave taught X, he was not led by God. You agreed with X, which means you were also not led by God.

 

Get out of that one. I dare you.

 

If God does not lead The Restored Church of God, who or what does?

 

David C. Pack tells you everything you need to hear to make a judgment call if he is true or not.

 

 

@ 07:19 And I could wear you out for hours proving that.

 

This is like that kid who has a secret girlfriend in Canada. You have never seen her or spoken to her. The kid has “too many pictures” of her to pick just one and show you to prove it. You just have to believe him.

 

Dave has a secret girlfriend in Canada. Her name is IcanproveitifIhadmoretime. And she is a hottie.

 

@ 07:23 “Well, how come you didn’t see it before?” Well, how come nobody who’s ever lived ever saw it before? If it's all in one day, it would explain how everything God does takes seven years.

 

What an insecure little man. So defensive with theoretical opponents. It is too bad he does not consider why he does see things “God never intended.” Only then could he comprehend that he is his own worst opponent.

 

@ 12:58 Is this the last day of my voice when I am about to sound the trumpet because we’re in the shadow of Trumpets? It’s now or never. Time is serious.

 

If only it were the last day of your voice, Dave. Amen. Let it be as you have said.

 

He could have added, “And I’m totally cereal,” to convey real emphasis.

 

“Now or never” flies against the concept of “we go another year.” At this point, I am not sure if even Dave knows what he believes. To be fair, that was twelve minutes ago, and as Dr. Feelbad teaches, we must let the past go because remembering the past will confuse us.

 

According to Andrew, this is a dynamic process. Prophecy is not easy. Twelve minutes is an eternity in the evolution of biblical knowledge. Just go with it.

 

 

@ 17:24 So, we never knew that Christ Himself to open [Revelation] Chapter 10, Who’s called a Mighty Angel is Jesus Christ. We thought it was maybe Michael or Gabriel or somebody. Even though he described him in the absolute glory of the Jesus Christ of Chapter 1. We just never saw those things right there in plain sight. Thundering at us. Screaming at us.

 

The next time you hear an enabler from Headquarters tell the brethren, “no doctrines have changed” inside RCG, keep that note in your margin. One of the reasons I left was because of the radical changes to where the Father and Jesus Christ were in the Bible.

 

If David C. Pack told Herbert W. Armstrong that the Mighty Angel in Revelation 10 was Jesus Christ but starting in verse 7, it was Dave himself…he would have been disfellowshipped and marked on the spot.

 

But today, he is a visionary led by God with nobody on the face of the earth to tell him otherwise.

 

Fret not. God will work it out.

 

@ 17:57 But it’s impossible to believe that he [Elijah] doesn’t sound on Trumpets. So, is it a coincidence we’re learning this right now? A coincidence we’re learning right now that this man sounds on Trumpets? And we’re in the shadow of Trumpets.

 

Speaking of coincidences.

 

Part 239 – March 18, 2020

@ 1:04:40 It’s perfect. Now we’re gonna start to pile up an extraordinary number of coincidences here… if you have any Spirit of God in you…I believe I have a lot of it. You just hafta look out and know there’s not 50 more sermons left. Never mind 150 for three more years of Mystery of God. However wrong I might have been that there were 40 more from 199 to 239, they’re not 150 more…



SFX - The Price Is Right

To put that in perspective: 239 + 150 is 389. We are now at Part 394. So much for Dave knowing what the heckfire he is talking about.

 

If we go further in the Wayback Machine, Sherman can listen to this one again:

 

Part 206 – September 30, 2019

@ 2:08:44 What do you know? It’s a coincidence Mr. Pack is finishing his series on the Feast of Trumpets.What do you know? That God didn’t have that in mind because I’m telling you, I’ve said it before…we’re done! I will not come back. I had to ‘bout put a gun to my own head to come up here.


SFX - The Price Is Right

Coincidences are not proofs.

 

@ 21:06 Those clouds [Zephaniah 1:15] arrive at noon. High noon. On the exact middle of the day on Trumpets. Exactly. Dead smack when there's no shadow. It says in the middle of noon, and then noon means the dead middle of the day. So, there's no doubt that's when the flight is. That's when people are taken out of Jerusalem, and they go to the Place of Safety.


SFX - The Price Is Right

Noontime in Jerusalem tomorrow is 12:30pm. That will be at 5:30am tomorrow morning in Wadsworth. If you can sip your coffee in the United States and Canada on Monday, then David C. Pack has failed again. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope.

 

 

Here is another teaching that pulled me out the door of The Restored Church of God.

 

@ 27:53 …one of the great reasons for this seven-year series is we had to separate God and Christ all through the Bible. So, just in case, you know, we’ve had some scoffers leave the church, "Oh, he's putting Jesus down." Well, I'm gonna prove to you that Paul knew that the Lord who descended and shouted and blew a trumpet was God Almighty.

 

The Prime RCG Nemesis (aka the dictionary) had this to say:

 

scoff

verb

1. speak to someone or about something in a scornfully derisive or mocking way

 

noun

1. an expression of scornful derision

 

David C. Pack dismantled what HWA taught and what he promised to continue to teach when he founded RCG, and then scrambled where the Father and Jesus Christ are identified in the Bible. But if people take issue with that, they are just being “scoffers.”

 

That is false and dismissive. Dave and the Headquarters “ministers” are totally fine with this. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope tomorrow.

 

Psalm 47 is the ace up his sleeve.

 

@ 28:40 Ready? “God is gone up with a shout. The LORD with a sound of a trumpet.” The trump of God. God! So, was the LORD Who shouted and blew a trumpet, Jesus Christ? Or was it God? But nobody ever saw it. Hiding in plain sight.

 

David C. Pack teaches that Jesus Christ is not God. That is "another Jesus," and I had to leave. Why more do not flee each time he teaches these types of things is a big question. He is no longer meddling with just prophecy; he is meddling with Who God is.

 

The First Commandment is first for a reason. No wonder Dave will NEVER be right. He does not even know that Jesus Christ is God and He is one with the Father. Putting a razor blade between them is foolish. But he keeps doing it.

 

David C. Pack “presumed” and “thought” and taught what God “never intended,” but is a trusted source for where the Father and Jesus Christ are in the Bible? No, thank you. If the man cannot be faithful with the little things, he cannot be faithful with the biggest things.

 

@ 31:29 The learning process has not stopped. My task is to end the Mystery of God. To make matters plain. To prepare the way before God comes in an imminent way. Right in the face of God. And when I've done that, I've finished a charge. And apparently, it ends with a final ration, and this is the fifth final ration.

 

SFX - The Price Is Right

@ 32:34 So, is it coincidence we’re connecting just these dots that I covered already only hours before Trumpets arrives in Jerusalem?


SFX - The Price Is Right

In an astounding display of cognitive dissonance, Dave gets to the topic of the 1335 and proceeds to school himself.




He attacks his very own previous teachings as if they originated with the Catholics or the Splinters. I wonder if anyone in the Main Hall turned to their spouse and asked, “Why is he so mad? Isn’t he the one who taught us this?”

 

He says his own teaching “never made sense” and then throws in an "on God's authority" for good measure because the days of "let your yes be yes, and your no be no" are long over.

 

@ 37:20 So, you have to accept that we are piercing and waiting to the 1335, which, on God's authority, has to be Trumpets because nothing can happen before Trumpets.

 

SFX - The Price Is Right

@ 38:27 …nothing can happen until 11:33 tomorrow morning. And I think there’s zero chance anything will happen at that time.

 

We shared a rare moment of agreement. Dave was finally right about something, though. Nothing happened at 11:33am this morning. Gold star for you, buddy.

 

@ 39:15 So, you’re blessed when you get to a day. At 11:33 tomorrow, you’ve made it. That doesn’t mean you receive eternal life. But you’re not gonna wait 15 days to find out, “Oh, I guess we were blessed back there a couple weeks ago.” That was always ridiculous. I didn’t know how to resolve it with the days problem that we had to have.


SFX - The Price Is Right

We agree again. It was "always" ridiculous, like it was in 2021 when I resigned "in the midst of the 1335."

 

The man is cracking. He is attacking his own teaching. Again. But if any brethren inside The Restored Church of God called that teaching “ridiculous” a week ago, they would have been suspended. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope tomorrow.

 

David C. Pack tells you everything you need to hear to make a judgment call if he is true or not.

 

The rest of Part 394 is white noise. You get the picture. Dave is counting on the next 24 hours to be IT. In reality, nothing will happen in Jerusalem, and nothing will happen in Wadsworth.

 

Dave will fail because that is the only possible outcome for all of his prophetic teachings. Ever.

 

What is also certain is that all the weak, broken enablers at The Restored Church of God will give Dave "a pass" on this most-recent fraud and lap up his excuses like a thirsty mutt. Spineless hirelings care not for the sheep.

 

Brad, Ed, Jaco, Ryan, Ken, Tim, Carl, Andrew, Jim, Salasi, Frank, Mike, and Raymond will not lift a finger nor utter a peep. They could choose to take action but will not.

 

 

Dear Brethren of The Restored Church of God,

 

If you listen to the Offertory music during the AM Service tomorrow, then David C. Pack has failed again. Before you sign your check and close your green envelope, consider that.

 

Consider this is how they see you.

 


Also, consider where your desperately needed funds might go under the guise of “doing The Work.”



Let your dollar amount directly indicate your confidence level in the RCG “leadership.”



Marc Cebrian