Sunday, September 25, 2022

Dave Pack: "The sterling reputation of David C. Pack and the The Restored Church of God hinges on the events of Trumpets this year being accurate."

 


Dave Pack pulling failed prophecies out of his hat 
week after week


David C. Pack Mocks Himself

 

The powers that be at Headquarters in The Restored Church of God must have recited my article from yesterday because David C. Pack took the stage after dinner to power-sit, “The Greatest Unending Story! (Part 394).”

 

When I wrote, “If only there were time left in the current world for Part 394,” I was being sarcastic, fellas. Man, I need to be more cautious because they might be paying attention to what is posted here.

 

The Feast of Trumpets began in Jerusalem at 6:32pm, which translates to 11:32am Wadsworth time which translates to David C. Pack having a Super-Duper-Long-Day-of-Failure starting before this article is posted and lasting until 7:16pm Monday night.

 

By the time you read this, David C. Pack has already begun failing. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope tomorrow.

 

For those just tuning in, Dave has been blowing hot air for months about a Kingdom of God preceding the Feast of Trumpets. It was not quite 50 days. Then, a retroactive 45 days. Then, 30 days. 10 days. 9 days. (Have you spotted the trend yet?) 8 days. 7 days. 6 days. 3.5-ish days. – Then it all "became clear" that this "one month" is like Joshua's Long Day and happens ON Trumpets instead of before it.

 

I glossed over this part of the Friday night Pathetic Update in Member Services. Since Dave is making it a Thing now, it is worth sharing.

 

“The day—that day—the evil day—last day—great day—the day of trouble—day of rebuke—day of wrath—day of vengeance—day of visitation—day of Christ—day of the Lord—the end—the end of all things—the end of the world—the time—the year of visitation—the year of My redeemed—the year of recompenses—the acceptable year—are all different terms for one astonishing, very long day that is broken into what looks like separate days, but is not! Everything has to occur in one month.”

 

Dave uses the Bible like Felix the Cat’s Bag of Tricks. He reached in, pulled out Joshua and Zechariah, then origamied them into an entire month of events compressed into a single day: The Feast of Trumpets, which has already begun in Jerusalem.

 

Yeppers. All that business started a few hours ago.

 

Two objects cannot occupy the same space at the same time. But in the wacky world of David C. Pack, the Bible is an all-you-can-eat buffet of possibilities. And all the “ministers” at Headquarters agree? No way, JosĂ©.

 

Spoiler Alert: David C. Pack schools himself and admits some of his

own teachings “never made sense” and were “ridiculous.”

 

The sterling reputation of David C. Pack and the entire organization known as The Restored Church of God hinges on the events of Trumpets this year being accurate. Would God let Dave fail so spectacularly and publicly if he were a true apostle?

 

 

@ 00:06 We’re now in the shadow, literally, of the Feast of Trumpets.

@ 00:19 So, lemme use this term. “Time has grown serious.” It’s become now or wait a year. And I don’t believe for two seconds we’re gonna wait a year.

 

That is a significant update from seven days ago.

 

Part 393 – September 17

@ 35:47 If we got to Monday morning [September 19], we’re waiting another year


SFX - The Price Is Right

Sound effects have been added to enhance your Dave Pack learning experience.

 

And this is the guy that Brad, Ed, Jaco, Ryan, Ken, Tim, Carl, Andrew, Jim, Salasi, Frank, Mike, and Raymond want you to worship follow? Pulease.

 

@ 00:54 But eventually, there would come a message that would be right in the face of the arrival of God, right before this man sounds. There would be a ration, and the charge would be finished.

 

He is a super-fan of my website and keeps it flush with new content. I do appreciate the support, Dave.

 

@ 06:49 I could easily tonight go three or four hours on all I've learned since last Sabbath.

 

The silent, internal screams of “No!” from the entire Headquarters congregation shook my windows a mile away. Only Stepford Prime was disappointed that Dave did not go through with it.

 

@ 06:54 We had a riveting discussion on Thursday. Learning a mile a minute as we’re coming into Trumpets about how God never intended 10 days, or 7 days, or 3.5 days, or any days precede the Feast of Trumpets.He’s going to do everything in that one day of so many names.

 

David C. Pack does not consider the implications of his words. He condemns himself, and he condemns the enablers at Headquarters without intending to.

 

So, God “never intended” that you teach what you have for months? Hmmm. Interesting.

 

Why did you do it, then? What spirit was driving you if it was not God? What put those ideas in your head and made the teaching FEEL like it was from God? What other things are you teaching that you FEEL are from God but are not? How often can you be so utterly wrong about God's plan, admit that to the church, but still believe God is guiding you?

 

It was not all clear before Part 394, but now it is? Pulease.

 

David C. Pack, when will you begin to question whether or not you serve the true God at all? I do not think you can. I think that is impossible for you. You have crossed the event horizon and can never return to being a true minister of Jesus Christ.



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To the “ministers” at Headquarters:

 

Your Pastor General just admitted (again) that he was teaching what God “never intended.”

 

Brad, Ed, Jaco, Ryan, Ken, Tim, Carl, Andrew, Jim, Salasi, Frank, Mike, and Raymond…You all agreed with concepts that God never intended. Perhaps you are all not as close to God as you believe.

 

This is a logic puzzle you cannot crack.

 

Dave taught X. You all agreed with X. Dave declared X is not of God. Since Dave taught X, he was not led by God. You agreed with X, which means you were also not led by God.

 

Get out of that one. I dare you.

 

If God does not lead The Restored Church of God, who or what does?

 

David C. Pack tells you everything you need to hear to make a judgment call if he is true or not.

 

 

@ 07:19 And I could wear you out for hours proving that.

 

This is like that kid who has a secret girlfriend in Canada. You have never seen her or spoken to her. The kid has “too many pictures” of her to pick just one and show you to prove it. You just have to believe him.

 

Dave has a secret girlfriend in Canada. Her name is IcanproveitifIhadmoretime. And she is a hottie.

 

@ 07:23 “Well, how come you didn’t see it before?” Well, how come nobody who’s ever lived ever saw it before? If it's all in one day, it would explain how everything God does takes seven years.

 

What an insecure little man. So defensive with theoretical opponents. It is too bad he does not consider why he does see things “God never intended.” Only then could he comprehend that he is his own worst opponent.

 

@ 12:58 Is this the last day of my voice when I am about to sound the trumpet because we’re in the shadow of Trumpets? It’s now or never. Time is serious.

 

If only it were the last day of your voice, Dave. Amen. Let it be as you have said.

 

He could have added, “And I’m totally cereal,” to convey real emphasis.

 

“Now or never” flies against the concept of “we go another year.” At this point, I am not sure if even Dave knows what he believes. To be fair, that was twelve minutes ago, and as Dr. Feelbad teaches, we must let the past go because remembering the past will confuse us.

 

According to Andrew, this is a dynamic process. Prophecy is not easy. Twelve minutes is an eternity in the evolution of biblical knowledge. Just go with it.

 

 

@ 17:24 So, we never knew that Christ Himself to open [Revelation] Chapter 10, Who’s called a Mighty Angel is Jesus Christ. We thought it was maybe Michael or Gabriel or somebody. Even though he described him in the absolute glory of the Jesus Christ of Chapter 1. We just never saw those things right there in plain sight. Thundering at us. Screaming at us.

 

The next time you hear an enabler from Headquarters tell the brethren, “no doctrines have changed” inside RCG, keep that note in your margin. One of the reasons I left was because of the radical changes to where the Father and Jesus Christ were in the Bible.

 

If David C. Pack told Herbert W. Armstrong that the Mighty Angel in Revelation 10 was Jesus Christ but starting in verse 7, it was Dave himself…he would have been disfellowshipped and marked on the spot.

 

But today, he is a visionary led by God with nobody on the face of the earth to tell him otherwise.

 

Fret not. God will work it out.

 

@ 17:57 But it’s impossible to believe that he [Elijah] doesn’t sound on Trumpets. So, is it a coincidence we’re learning this right now? A coincidence we’re learning right now that this man sounds on Trumpets? And we’re in the shadow of Trumpets.

 

Speaking of coincidences.

 

Part 239 – March 18, 2020

@ 1:04:40 It’s perfect. Now we’re gonna start to pile up an extraordinary number of coincidences here… if you have any Spirit of God in you…I believe I have a lot of it. You just hafta look out and know there’s not 50 more sermons left. Never mind 150 for three more years of Mystery of God. However wrong I might have been that there were 40 more from 199 to 239, they’re not 150 more…



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To put that in perspective: 239 + 150 is 389. We are now at Part 394. So much for Dave knowing what the heckfire he is talking about.

 

If we go further in the Wayback Machine, Sherman can listen to this one again:

 

Part 206 – September 30, 2019

@ 2:08:44 What do you know? It’s a coincidence Mr. Pack is finishing his series on the Feast of Trumpets.What do you know? That God didn’t have that in mind because I’m telling you, I’ve said it before…we’re done! I will not come back. I had to ‘bout put a gun to my own head to come up here.


SFX - The Price Is Right

Coincidences are not proofs.

 

@ 21:06 Those clouds [Zephaniah 1:15] arrive at noon. High noon. On the exact middle of the day on Trumpets. Exactly. Dead smack when there's no shadow. It says in the middle of noon, and then noon means the dead middle of the day. So, there's no doubt that's when the flight is. That's when people are taken out of Jerusalem, and they go to the Place of Safety.


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Noontime in Jerusalem tomorrow is 12:30pm. That will be at 5:30am tomorrow morning in Wadsworth. If you can sip your coffee in the United States and Canada on Monday, then David C. Pack has failed again. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope.

 

 

Here is another teaching that pulled me out the door of The Restored Church of God.

 

@ 27:53 …one of the great reasons for this seven-year series is we had to separate God and Christ all through the Bible. So, just in case, you know, we’ve had some scoffers leave the church, "Oh, he's putting Jesus down." Well, I'm gonna prove to you that Paul knew that the Lord who descended and shouted and blew a trumpet was God Almighty.

 

The Prime RCG Nemesis (aka the dictionary) had this to say:

 

scoff

verb

1. speak to someone or about something in a scornfully derisive or mocking way

 

noun

1. an expression of scornful derision

 

David C. Pack dismantled what HWA taught and what he promised to continue to teach when he founded RCG, and then scrambled where the Father and Jesus Christ are identified in the Bible. But if people take issue with that, they are just being “scoffers.”

 

That is false and dismissive. Dave and the Headquarters “ministers” are totally fine with this. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope tomorrow.

 

Psalm 47 is the ace up his sleeve.

 

@ 28:40 Ready? “God is gone up with a shout. The LORD with a sound of a trumpet.” The trump of God. God! So, was the LORD Who shouted and blew a trumpet, Jesus Christ? Or was it God? But nobody ever saw it. Hiding in plain sight.

 

David C. Pack teaches that Jesus Christ is not God. That is "another Jesus," and I had to leave. Why more do not flee each time he teaches these types of things is a big question. He is no longer meddling with just prophecy; he is meddling with Who God is.

 

The First Commandment is first for a reason. No wonder Dave will NEVER be right. He does not even know that Jesus Christ is God and He is one with the Father. Putting a razor blade between them is foolish. But he keeps doing it.

 

David C. Pack “presumed” and “thought” and taught what God “never intended,” but is a trusted source for where the Father and Jesus Christ are in the Bible? No, thank you. If the man cannot be faithful with the little things, he cannot be faithful with the biggest things.

 

@ 31:29 The learning process has not stopped. My task is to end the Mystery of God. To make matters plain. To prepare the way before God comes in an imminent way. Right in the face of God. And when I've done that, I've finished a charge. And apparently, it ends with a final ration, and this is the fifth final ration.

 

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@ 32:34 So, is it coincidence we’re connecting just these dots that I covered already only hours before Trumpets arrives in Jerusalem?


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In an astounding display of cognitive dissonance, Dave gets to the topic of the 1335 and proceeds to school himself.




He attacks his very own previous teachings as if they originated with the Catholics or the Splinters. I wonder if anyone in the Main Hall turned to their spouse and asked, “Why is he so mad? Isn’t he the one who taught us this?”

 

He says his own teaching “never made sense” and then throws in an "on God's authority" for good measure because the days of "let your yes be yes, and your no be no" are long over.

 

@ 37:20 So, you have to accept that we are piercing and waiting to the 1335, which, on God's authority, has to be Trumpets because nothing can happen before Trumpets.

 

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@ 38:27 …nothing can happen until 11:33 tomorrow morning. And I think there’s zero chance anything will happen at that time.

 

We shared a rare moment of agreement. Dave was finally right about something, though. Nothing happened at 11:33am this morning. Gold star for you, buddy.

 

@ 39:15 So, you’re blessed when you get to a day. At 11:33 tomorrow, you’ve made it. That doesn’t mean you receive eternal life. But you’re not gonna wait 15 days to find out, “Oh, I guess we were blessed back there a couple weeks ago.” That was always ridiculous. I didn’t know how to resolve it with the days problem that we had to have.


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We agree again. It was "always" ridiculous, like it was in 2021 when I resigned "in the midst of the 1335."

 

The man is cracking. He is attacking his own teaching. Again. But if any brethren inside The Restored Church of God called that teaching “ridiculous” a week ago, they would have been suspended. Consider that before you stuff your green envelope tomorrow.

 

David C. Pack tells you everything you need to hear to make a judgment call if he is true or not.

 

The rest of Part 394 is white noise. You get the picture. Dave is counting on the next 24 hours to be IT. In reality, nothing will happen in Jerusalem, and nothing will happen in Wadsworth.

 

Dave will fail because that is the only possible outcome for all of his prophetic teachings. Ever.

 

What is also certain is that all the weak, broken enablers at The Restored Church of God will give Dave "a pass" on this most-recent fraud and lap up his excuses like a thirsty mutt. Spineless hirelings care not for the sheep.

 

Brad, Ed, Jaco, Ryan, Ken, Tim, Carl, Andrew, Jim, Salasi, Frank, Mike, and Raymond will not lift a finger nor utter a peep. They could choose to take action but will not.

 

 

Dear Brethren of The Restored Church of God,

 

If you listen to the Offertory music during the AM Service tomorrow, then David C. Pack has failed again. Before you sign your check and close your green envelope, consider that.

 

Consider this is how they see you.

 


Also, consider where your desperately needed funds might go under the guise of “doing The Work.”



Let your dollar amount directly indicate your confidence level in the RCG “leadership.”



Marc Cebrian


30 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry but this man has no idea what he is talking about. His ramblings are just a bunch of concepts devised in his mind as to what "his" interpretation of scripture should be. You know its really sad in a way, to see a man who should know better, if he really had the spirit of God guiding him, (which he doesn't). After this next prophetic failure, he will once again tell us all about how the math makes perfect sense and when his next prophetic failure is supposed to happen.

Ronco said...

The Price Is Right Losing Horn- the official anthem of the (insert name here) COG prophecy charade.

Anonymous said...


This is ALL an UNNECESSARY struggle. Why does anyone need to know when Christ will return?

Just RELAX and Rest in God. Live a righteous life, believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and the New Covenant that He started, and let God the Father decide when things happen.

Your job is to live a righteous life, worship God in spirit and truth, love God and your neighbor. Then you will be ready whenever it happens.

Leave RCG now and find peace in the simplicity of Jesus.

Anonymous said...

Hi ministry and congregation is as mentally ill as he is

Anonymous said...

CHOICES

A. Philadelphia Cult of Flurry: Get lied to, deceived, bullied, abused, and robbed by a perverted little runt.

B. Restored Cult of Pack: Get lied to, deceived, bullied, abused, and robbed by a taller pervert. This seems slightly more normal.

C. None Of The Above: Do NOT get lied to, deceived, bullied, abused, and robbed by a pervert, either short or tall.

Anonymous said...

Sunday, September 25, 2022 at 5:16:00 PM PDT

YOU should be leading a church.

Anonymous said...

No, nobody should be leading a church. (That ruins people!)

What's really sad? If things do not end well for Dave and his members, people will not learn. Someone else will rise up and attempt the same thing.

Anonymous said...

You think you got the truth but people can believe in Mr. Pack's church if they want to.

Anonymous said...

Remember the words of John 10:10.

"I have come that they may have crackpot speculative math, and that they may have it more abundantly."

Ronco said...

"Brad, Ed, Jaco, Ryan, Ken, Tim, Carl, Andrew, Jim, Salasi, Frank, Mike, and Raymond will not lift a finger nor utter a peep. They could choose to take action but will not."

Mr. Pack signs their paychecks.

Anonymous said...

But the righteous life can and should be, and is, defined.

Anonymous said...

It's not bad enough that you can't wear your stylish loafers to sabbath services, and you have to dress up any time you go out in public, and there is no such thing as a beer run because it just might give the appearance of evil. This on top of giving away all your blessings because they have been declared "common"! You have to get psyched up every sermon, cultivating the proper attitude towards prophecy so that you actually believe that there is no way possible that Jesus isn't coming when they say He is, only to have "Lucy" Pack pull the football on you at the last possible moment and give a lame excuse and another false promise!

Sheesh! Better to be lied to about Santa Claus!!!

Anonymous said...

Marc, I think you just gave the best offering message I’ve heard! :)

Marc Cebrian said...

It is after 2pm in Jerusalem and the sun is rising in Wadsworth, Ohio.

DCP is doing an early-morning scramble (and that is not breakfast). It must not have been Jerusalem time, but Joseph's time! That means he has another chance to be right five hours from now.

But maybe like on Elul 24 in 2013, the US dateline does not complete until Hawaii sees a sunset. That would buy him another six hours.

A new DCP failure slowly passes into the history books. A very-long-day for him indeed.

Tonto said...

Matthew 24:36
But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.

Zippo said...

Unlike HWA, who managed to worm his way out of the great 1972 disappointment, no one will believe DCP if he claims "We don't set dates!". Dave needs to be mentored by Bob Thiel in how to add wiggle words to his procrastination.

Anonymous said...

HWA visited world leaders non stop for years after the failure of 1975. It wouldn't surprise me if he stayed away because he feared for his life. Tens of thousands left his church and many suffered catastrophic financial losses due to his 1975 lie.

Anonymous said...

No 2nd-Advent to the new Garden of Eden - No television trucks on Ambassador drive

Anonymous said...

I don't think HWA ever exposed himself to his critics. He would be driven in his Cadillac limo down to the underground garage in the Hall of Administration. From there he would take his private elevator to his office on the fourth floor. He would arrive to services late to avoid meeting others. He lived in a bubble. No one could challenge him. No one could ask him questions. The top leaders who wanted to maintain their residences on Waverly Drive were too timid to questions or challenge him or his teachings. He probably cared little about the effect of his draconian teachings on families who had to break up due to his D & R teaching, those who were impoverished due to his three tithes plus generous giving teaching, those who suffered physically and mentally due to his "if any sick among you, call upon the elders" teaching. He was truly a horrible person.

Marc Cebrian said...

I must be a true non-prophet because Dave is doing EXACTLY what I wrote earlier today. Not Jerusalem, but Joseph time. Evening or dark in Ohio, which means the brethren near the international dateline are still in Trumpets. I totally nailed it. - Dave must be reading EVERYTHING I write. :)

PS - Article about this later.

Anonymous said...

DAVID C PACK SPEAKS THE TRUTH!
Just before the end of the comical clip of Dave shown above, he utters the undeniable truth: "It never made any sense"! See doubters, the man speaks the truth!!!

Anonymous said...

So tiresome. Yet another no show.

Ronco said...



Well, sunset has arrived in beautiful Wadsworth, Ohio and no show...

Might just as well go to bed and start dreaming about next year!

https://youtu.be/BctWze2UMj4?t=2925

I wonder just how must cash RCG hauled in today.

DW said...

For the life of me, I cannot comprehend why these people stay. I notice in your great article, Marc, that he doesn't even teach that all true believers HAVE ETERNAL LIFE?!?! A gift from God, at the moment we receive Jesus. The MOST important truth to any Christian and Dave totally misses it (although, technically, Dave SELLS IT)! That's what happens when you have absolutely no idea what you are talking about, but start a church anyway. Just lather, rinse, repeat with Flurry, Weinland, Flower girl, et al. But that humdinger of heresy will be on Dave's head when so many will be condemned for believing such outright lies. I keep asking myself, what the hell book is he reading?

You know the expression "if you give a monkey enough time, eventually it will type out the Bible"? Dave doesn't even qualify as a monkey.

Anonymous said...

Now that we have another "official" No Show, what does the math say? What is the new perfect day of return? How about those 1335 days. Where do we go from here? When is Dave's new, it all makes sense pronouncement due? So many questions, so many false prophesy's. How can anyone still attend that Circus in Wadsworth. And on a final note, how are the horses at the compound? Are they being treated well? Asking for a friend.

Anonymous said...

Where is that clown TC when you need him. Wonder what he thinks about Dave's latest prophetic failure.

Anonymous said...

To:Anon September 26, 2022 at 5:54:00 PM PDT

I know you know, TC, it just showed up as Anon September 26, 2022 at 2:46:00 PM PDT. Welcome back TC, are you feeling the heat?

Anonymous said...

I am Sunday September 25, 2022 at 6:11:00 PM PDT:

"Anonymous said...
No, nobody should be leading a church. (That ruins people!)"
Sunday, September 25, 2022 at 7:00:00 PM PDT

On further thought I agree, you are right on.

Anonymous said...

Why doesn't he try selling vacuum cleaners? Such a talented man with a penchant for bull shit.

Anonymous said...

Any new date for the return? I'm having trouble sleeping. I really want to know when the scheduled no show will be. But what really scares me is i do need a new vacuum cleaner.