Saturday, September 8, 2012

If the Apostle Only Eats Edam Cheese and a Pear on High Days Then You Should Too!

Lest any of you sinning  members out there forget how to keep the Sabbath and High Days at the Feast this year, the apostle has laid down the law.  The apostle only eats Edam cheese, a pear and a small salad.  If it is appropriate for him then it should be for you too!  I can just picture Malm's acolytes running out and buying the same products.  COG members did the same thing when HWA declared he liked certain foods and alcohol.  Since the apostle deserved the best and emulated how the kingdom should be then church members were expected to do the same thing.

The very idea that a church member needs to ask what they are supposed to do instead of using their own brain tells a lot about his followers.  God forbid if a COG member actually made a logical decision on their own and stuck to it regardless of what the apostle or minister thought.

I have been asked how to observe Sabbath and High Days in regards to not working, buying or selling on those days.

First it is important to arrive early enough to take care of all necessaries before the first High Day or Sabbath
It is best especially if one has children to seek a unit with a kitchenette. In any case in today’s world almost all grocers have very convenient ready to eat choices from veggies and dip plates, to ready made salads, fruit, sandwiches, cookies and sweets, cheeses, bread etc etc.  If there is no refrigeration a cooler or simply putting them out in the car over the coolness of the night will keep carefully selected food over night.

I have found that I tend to eat too much of the wrong things at the Feast anyway; and a break from that and a simple mid day meal of a salad, a pear, and some Edam cheese suits me fine as a break from the heavy food.

Remember to tell the staff that no room service will be needed.

It is extremely easy to use the preparation day to acquire enough to last through Sabbath while eating an early dinner on the preparation day and a late dinner after sunset ends the Sabbath, Holy Day;  while observing Sabbath without buying food or cooking.

The only real difference between being “on he road” and at home, is that at home we can cook extra food on the preparation day, while on the road we have to be ready food in advance of the Sabbath or High Day.


Douglas Becker said...

But don't forget to pray that God remove the poison from the food before you eat it, because pretty much everything is poison (and if you keep the Feast in Kellogg, Idaho, take note that the water has lead and toxic heavy metals in it from the ore and mining of the past in this historical site).

It's a wonder anyone has lived this long in the Armstrongist Churches of God.

And cheese? Excuse me? Cheese?

Cheese of any kind is mostly just useless and high cholesterol inducing fat -- not good for you at all!


You're apostle may inadvertantly poison you!!!

Allen C. Dexter said...

Why can't commenters (and authors) get your and you're straight? I see them mixed up all the time.

Your is a simple pronoun and you're is a contraction of you are.

"You're apostle" is just plain incorrect. Try saying "you are apostle" and see how ridiculous it is.

Anonymous said...

They'res too kinds a peeple in teh world, those who can spill and those who cant

Anonymous said...

Is this guy Mr. Micromanager or what? He talks to his followers like they are children. I am sure the next thing he will say is that , "You all are like my children."

genoxec 90

Anonymous said...

On this one, I think the poor apostle is not totally responsible. His followers are acting like children. They are putting him up on a pedestal. To a certain extent, they deserve to be treated like children. However, this does not excuse the poor apostle for not immediately disabusing them of their idolatry.

I will admit that even though I disagree with probably everything the poor apostle says, he has got some degree of courage and just plain balls to keep going, even though I don't think he has enough sense to know if he's going ever deeper into error. Balls are necessary, but unfortunately, not sufficient.

Unless I miss my guess, the poor apostle is a narcissist who craves to be idolized, but he's also a little surprised that he's been successful enough that a few people are actually beginning to worship him. He's also far too principled (not to mention incompetent) to capitalize on those people in any spectacular way as Herbie did (thankfully). Principled doesn't mean he's a good person, it just means he's a disciplined sort of person, not that those principles are helpful. It probably means he suffers from OCD.

Byker Bob said...

Ah, yes. How well I remember. HWA once professed that occasionally he would drink half a baby Oly, and then pour the rest of this beer down the drain. Soon, everyone was citing that as their own drinking pattern! Yet, Mark and Garner Ted had to carry him to bed on numerous occasions, if their reports are accurate.

Any leader who sets forth his own example of eating cheese and a pear on high days is cultically minded, no mistake about it. John the Baptist didn't teach everyone to eat locusts and honey, and in my book, JtB was much greater than James Malm. The insistence that everyone conform to an "apostle's" personal preferences in food, clothing, hair styles, or music is totally bogus. Those things have nothing to do with attitudes of the heart as taught in the sermon on the mount or beatitudes, and are therefore unimportant.


Assistant Deacon said...

I'm just surprised, and more than a little relieved, that Malm didn't slip back into his feeble attempt at King James scripture-speak to share his latest insights.

M-Wave said...

What do you sound pretentious with other than truth and lies?