False Moses
David C. Pack’s failed prophecy Series has wandered aimlessly into its tenth year, dragging along the weary brethren of The Restored Church of God through the dismal swamp of his human steam-driven ego. Inaudibly charged with an uncertain assignment by a fickle god and surrounded by complacent enablers, the Pastor General sounds his own trumpet before his worshipers. At the same time, he beckons for sympathy for his self-inflicted burdens from the very people who pay him for his lies.
“The Greatest Story Never Told! (Part 1)” was given on November 14, 2015. The four-part sermon focused on how the Third Temple would be built and continued through Part 7. The Part 8 inset brushed Jesus Christ aside to make room for Dave to seize His role as That Prophet.
Excuse me, a correction. Elijah is That Prophet. Wink-wink.
As a natural-born quitter, David C. Pack has been specially trained inside his distorted reality bubble by bobble-headed Headquarters mollusks who always agree with this week’s flavor of malarkey.
Mmm… Prophetic Fraud and Blasphemy. It’s what’s for dinner.™
Despite Dave going it alone with no other faux apostles to consult with, rest assured that on the tenth anniversary on November 14, 2025, the most abysmally insufferable Series to ever plague a COG will continue “right on track” toward a promised land that he will never find.
Imagine David C. Pack as Moses leading the children of Israel to the Red Sea, but he cannot decide where to cross. Everyone is watching, eagerly anticipating the freedom they long for. While they expect him to make another bold declaration like he did back in Egypt when the sea was far away, Dave marches toward the shore but slows down as he approaches.
His heart races in panic because he is not sure where they should go. The evidence suggests maybe it is a half mile to the right. A list of proofs point to possibly being beyond those big rocks to the left. It is hard to know for sure based on all the “present truth” available.
Woe! The mind-breaking burden is agony.
Dave offers false assurances instead of confessing the truth and accuses his critics of being faithless. The scribes are labeled as “our enemies.” The trickster god Dave worships ghosted him again. What to do?
Surely, they cannot believe it is just a coincidence that they wanted to leave Egypt… and he came along to tell them he could lead them out of Egypt. The timing was just too perfect.
The crowd of Israelites watch their false Moses approach the water, but then he abruptly turns to the right. So, the zealous people follow him to the right. After two minutes of hesitant strolling, Dave turns around and heads in the opposite direction. The people follow him to the left.
Dave pauses to give a long-winded speech filled with stammering words until it becomes apparent he is stalling. He has no answer but drops flicks and hints to give the impression he does. They just are not ready for it yet.
Now that the false Moses is near the water, his gut feeling is no longer unwavering. He hides from the people how incredibly uncomfortable he really is.
The sea does not part. There is no still, small voice guiding him. His once “This is the hill I die on!” bravado bleeds away as his face goes pale.
Maybe he is getting sick. But only weak people hiding secret sins and practicing poor hygiene habits get ill. So, that cannot be it. Unless it is prophetic COVID again.
The only thing Dave is left to do is to walk back and forth, retreading his own footprints in the sand. The children of Israel reluctantly follow because they believe there are no other options. After all, they’ve come this far. It is too late to turn back now.
The brethren murmur when they see their divinely chosen leader's wavering.
“But his name means ‘Passover.’ That can’t just be a coincidence.”
"The proofs were impossible to misunderstand, but he somehow misunderstood.”
"This cannot be a ruse by God. That would make us all fools."
"He spoke in God's name, but nothing happened. Is that okay?”
"He said he would die before he changed his doctrine. But he still changed it.”
"His logic was impossible to argue with. Maybe I should have argued more."
"How come the laws and commandments apply to me but not to him?"
"He said God showed him this. Doesn't that make God a liar?"
At the first sign of the dust kicked up by the Egyptian army just over the hill, Bradford “Aaron” Schleifer and Edward “Miriam” Winkfield are the first to tuck tail and run to save their own skin because they knew they followed a false Moses but did not warn the people.
Ryan “Achan” Denee had already fled like a shaken leaf even when none pursued.
Though they professed with their tongues that Dave was God’s chosen leader and upheld his arms every time his sign or wonder failed, they did not hesitate to abandon the flock. As hirelings who care not for the sheep, they willfully lead them to the slaughter to preserve their own positions of authority, hold on to their private campus houses, and keep their harping wives quiet.
A troubling discomfort creeps over the people as they watch David “False Moses” Pack pace along the shore franticly pointing this way and that way, contradicting himself one moment to the next but assuring everyone they are “right on track” because he finally figured it out.
This is false apostle and inept prophet David C. Pack leading The Restored Church of God today. The water will never part. The RCG brethren will never cross the Red Sea. He will never lead them into the promised land.
Instead, they will rot in the salty sand because he was not sent by God, and he operates only on human steam.
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