55 Reasons Everyone Else Is Wrong and Crackpot Prophet Is the Last Real Prophet on Earth

 

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, and anyone still trapped in a Church of God splinter group, rejoice! The end of the world is technically still on the schedule… it’s just been moved. Again. 

Crackpot Bob Thiel, fearless leader of the Continuing Church of God and self-appointed final Philadelphian on the planet, has dropped not a warning, not a hint, but a 55-point manifesto explaining in exhaustive, soul-crushing detail why the Great Tribulation cannot possibly start until 2030 at the earliest. That’s right — while lesser prophets were foolishly eyeing 2026 or 2027 like amateurs, Bob was over here doing the real math. And by “real math,” we mean “whatever makes every single competing COG group look like bumbling Laodicean clowns who will be caught completely by surprise when the actual end times finally bother to show up.”

According to Bob, Jesus was very clear in Matthew 24: certain signs must happen first. A seven-year deal from Daniel 9:27 still hasn’t been confirmed. Therefore, by the sacred rules of prophetic arithmetic, the Tribulation is legally barred from beginning for at least another 3½ years. It’s not prophecy — it’s contractual law. God apparently runs on Bob’s calendar.

And if, by some miracle, Israel signs the exact peace deal Bob has been waiting for this summer, then we can all pencil in Jesus’ return for 2033. How thoughtful of Bob to give us the precise year. Most false prophets only guess the decade. Bob gives you the fiscal quarter.

But the real meat of the 55 points isn’t the dates. Oh no. The real meat is the comprehensive demolition of every other Church of God group on Earth. UCG? Wrong. LCG? Wrong. PCG? So wrong they might not even be converted. CG7? Preterist heretics. RCG? Don’t even get him started. Every single one of them has either added extra unbiblical requirements, misunderstood the King of the North, failed to recognize the final Elijah (conveniently Bob), or committed the unforgivable sin of not agreeing with Bob Thiel.

It’s less a prophecy article and more a 55-point Yelp review of the entire COG ecosystem, rated “Would not survive the Tribulation.”Bob helpfully reminds us that only the true Philadelphians (read: people who read his website) will be protected. Everyone else? They’ll be shocked when the King of the North invades the USA first, exactly as Bob predicted. Because nothing says “humble watchman” like spending thousands of words explaining why literally everyone who left or disagreed with you is going to get blindsided by events you yourself have now conveniently scheduled for 2030.Is the end of the world near?Yes.Just not until Bob Thiel finishes explaining, in 55 bullet points, why it can’t possibly be near yet.

In the meantime, feel free to live your life, pay your taxes, and maybe plant a tree or two. According to the one man who has cracked the prophetic code that has eluded every other COG leader for decades, you’ve got at least until early 2030 before things get interesting.

Unless, of course, Bob updates the article next week with 56 points.

Stay tuned. The countdown to the countdown has begun.

Priscilla and Aquila: The Biblical Power Couple Bob Thiel Can’t Quite Spin Into Submission

Priscilla and Aquila: Partners Who Actually Did the Work

In the mid-first century, while Emperor Claudius was busy expelling Jews from Rome, a married couple named Priscilla (also called Prisca) and Aquila packed up their tentmaking business and headed east. They landed in Corinth just in time to meet a traveling tentmaker-preacher named Paul. The three of them hit it off immediately. Same trade, same faith, same willingness to work with their hands so the gospel could keep moving. Paul stayed with them, and they worked side by side (Acts 18:1-3).

That was only the beginning of their remarkable mobility and ministry. 

They later traveled with Paul toward Ephesus. In that city, they encountered the eloquent but incompletely informed Alexandrian preacher Apollos, who was boldly proclaiming Jesus in the synagogue while still knowing only the baptism of John. Priscilla and Aquila heard him, took him aside, and together “explained to him the way of God more accurately” (Acts 18:26). Apollos went on to become a major force in the early church. The couple who quietly corrected him never asked for credit.

They hosted house churches — first in Rome, later apparently back in Ephesus. Paul calls them his “fellow workers in Christ Jesus” who “risked their own necks” for his life, adding that not only he but “all the churches of the Gentiles” owed them thanks (Romans 16:3-4). When Paul writes from prison, he still sends greetings from “Aquila and Priscilla… with the church that is in their house” (1 Corinthians 16:19). Near the end of his life, he greets them again in Ephesus (2 Timothy 4:19). They were mobile, courageous, doctrinally sharp, hospitable, and apparently tireless.

Notice something the text itself keeps doing: Priscilla’s name appears first in several key references. In Romans 16, in the common modern rendering of Acts 18:26, and elsewhere. In the ancient world, name order was not random. It often signaled prominence or initiative. The biblical authors were not shy about letting Priscilla’s name lead.

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Enter Crackpot Bob's VersionWriting on his COGwriter site, he writes about what he calls “The Christian team of Priscilla and Aquila.” He correctly notes that the Bible sometimes lists Priscilla first and graciously allows that this “is not to say that she was necessarily superior.” He recounts their tentmaking partnership with Paul, their move from Rome, and their instruction of Apollos. He even mentions that they hosted churches in their home and risked their lives.

Then comes the familiar pivot.

When Crakcpot Bob reaches the scene with Apollos, he writes that when “Aquila and Priscilla heard him, they took him aside…” — conveniently flipping the order that appears in many English translations and in the Greek text itself. He is quick to stress that Priscilla did not instruct men. 

The “team” framing does a lot of heavy lifting here. It allows acknowledgment of Priscilla’s presence while ensuring no dangerous ideas form about a woman actively participating in the theological formation of a prominent male teacher.

It is a neat bit of theological footwork. Celebrate the couple. List Priscilla first when it costs nothing. Then, the moment actual teaching happens, quietly put the husband’s name in front and remind everyone it was a joint operation. The underlying message is clear: whatever Priscilla contributed, it must be understood as safely under male headship so no one gets ideas about women teaching men — even privately, even alongside their own husbands, even when the text itself refuses to bury her name.

This is the same interpretive instinct that turns every New Testament example of women in ministry into an exception that proves the rule rather than evidence that the early church operated with more flexibility than later systematizers prefer.

Crackpot Bob's article also folds their story into the larger Continuing Church of God narrative about the “true church” being located in Ephesus rather than Rome. That is his prerogative, of course. But it means the couple’s actual lives — their bravery, their doctrinal precision, their willingness to host churches wherever they landed — become supporting evidence for a particular denominational claim rather than a straightforward celebration of two remarkable disciples who simply did the work.

The flaws are not in the facts that Crackpot Bob reports. The facts are mostly there. 

The flaw is in the anxious framing: the immediate qualification that Priscilla listing first does not mean superiority, the reordered names when teaching occurs, and the insistence on “team” language that functions less as description and more as damage control. It is the rhetorical equivalent of praising a woman for her contributions while making sure everyone knows she stayed in her lane.

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What the Text Actually ShowsPriscilla and Aquila were genuine co-laborers. They shared a trade that funded ministry. They shared a home that became a church. They shared the risk of protecting Paul. They shared the responsibility of correcting and equipping Apollos. The New Testament writers felt no need to constantly insert “under her husband’s authority” disclaimers because the partnership was obvious and functional.

Their story does not require modern readers to choose between “team” and individual contribution. It simply shows two people whose gifts and courage complemented each other so well that the early church remembered them together — often with Priscilla’s name leading. That is not a threat to a healthy marriage or sound doctrine. It is an example of what fruitful Christian partnership actually looked like before centuries of later tradition tried to flatten it.

Crackpot Bob is free to read the story through the lens of his cult gender assumptions. The rest of us are equally free to notice that the biblical text itself is considerably less anxious about Priscilla’s prominence than some of its later interpreters appear to be.

Priscilla and Aquila risked their necks for the gospel. The least we can do is let them keep the order of their names.

God’s Special “No Huge Mistakes” Insurance Policy Current Sinful Church of God Leaders Use

Nothing quite warms the heart of Church of God members than hearing their  leader casually announcing that he has achieved a level of spiritual excellence most of us can only dream of: zero major sins since baptism. And not only that — God Himself has apparently signed a binding contract promising that this same leader will never, ever be allowed to make a huge mistake that could damage “the Work.”

Because if there’s one thing the New Testament makes crystal clear, it’s that God has a VIP tier for certain ministers where catastrophic errors are magically rerouted like spam emails. This is the current thinking of Bob Thiel, Dave Pack. Gerald Flurry, Gerald Weston and almost all other COG leaders. All of these guys are grievous sinners yet we are supposed to give them a pass and pretend they are on a higher plain than us.

Remember when Rod Meredith said this:

We have brethren right now – and my word doesn't prove it to you – one thing I'm grateful, we have a lot of very human people in the work, but at least the leading ministers overall have been the most dedicated, the most solid, the most loyal men closest to God that I have ever experienced since the earliest days of the Church when just Mr. and Mrs. Armstrong were the father figure and mother figure. Pretty quick after that human nature came in and people were playing games – not horrible, I'm just saying we had a lot of [it], very obvious – now so many of the men like Mr. Ames, and Dr. Winnail, and Mr. Gerald Weston and others have been tested and tried, and tried and tested, and they have been walking with God, they've been put through the mill so to speak, and you have a group of men, that if anything happens to me, that have been tried and tested for DECADES, DECADES in the way of God. Will they make mistakes? YES! Did Mr. Armstrong ever make mistakes? Of course he did; he said many times, he said, "Herbert Armstrong has made HUNDREDS of mistakes." But he said, "God has never allowed me to make a huge mistake to destroy the Work." So he'll let us make little mistakes, but not huge mistakes, and then he'll straighten it out in his time.

Beautiful. Truly inspiring. It’s like having a divine bouncer at the door of your life who says, “Sorry, major sin? Not on my watch. Huge organizational disaster? Absolutely not. But feel free to stub your toe on minor errors — those build character.”

It must be a wonderful life, knowing you are incapable of ever doing anything seriously wrong or sinning in any significant way. That kind of logic is about as credible as claiming to be “doubly blessed” and then starting your own church. (This is why Pack refuses to apologize for lying to his followers, why Flurry will never tell his followers he is not a king and why Thiel will never correct the abysmal corruption in Africa - they don't care because they think they are not accountable).

According to this theology, Herbert and Loma Armstrong were basically sinless saints walking the earth in white robes until “a bunch of sniveling, backbiting members” showed up and introduced human nature into the equation. Because nothing says “humble servant of God” quite like blaming the entire body of Christ for your own potential shortcomings. The members didn’t just cause problems — they apparently corrupted the previously flawless leadership by their very presence. It’s the theological equivalent of saying, “I was doing fine until all these imperfect people started existing near me.”

The real crown jewel, though, is the claim that God has personally vetted a small group of men so thoroughly that He will now actively prevent them from making any mistake big enough to damage the Work. 

Little mistakes? Sure, God’s cool with those. 

Huge ones? Nope. Divine force field engaged. 

This is apparently what “walking with God” looks like in practice: decades of testing that result in supernatural error prevention, available only to the top tier. The rest of us regular humans? We just have to muddle through with normal consequences, repentance, and the terrifying possibility that our mistakes might actually matter.

Here’s where it gets especially delicious. This entire framework is pure Old Covenant cosplay wearing New Covenant clothing. 

Under the Old Covenant, sure — there were special anointed leaders who sometimes received extraordinary protection for the sake of the nation. Even then, most of them still managed to spectacularly crash and burn (David, Solomon, and roughly 90% of the kings of Israel and Judah would like a word).  

But the New Covenant did something rather inconvenient for this kind of thinking: it ended the special protected class. Jesus became the one and only sinless High Priest. The rest of us — including every minister who has ever lived — supposedly received the Holy Spirit and the ongoing reality that we still sin, still make big mistakes, and still need grace, accountability, and occasionally public correction. Paul called himself the chief of sinners after writing half the New Testament. Peter had to be publicly rebuked by Paul. 

The idea that any modern COG leader has graduated to “God will never let me destroy the Work with a huge mistake” level is not faith. It’s spiritual entitlement with a halo filter.

This theology is incredibly convenient. It means:

• No need for genuine accountability structures.
• Any major failure can be reframed as “God allowed a little mistake that He’s now straightening out.”
• The members remain “very human” while the leadership enjoys near-infallibility on anything that actually counts.

History has selectively rewritten so that the Armstrongs were perfect until the ungrateful rabble arrived. And, that long held belief that the original evangelists of the Radio/Worldwide Church of God were essentially sinless because God needed them to accomplish his mighty work. And even if they sinned, it was minor sins.

It’s almost as if the system was designed to protect the institution and its top men rather than reflect actual biblical teaching on human nature.

According to this worldview, some men have reached such a rarefied spiritual plane that God has installed a “no huge mistakes” clause in their contract. The rest of us are left with the old-fashioned New Covenant arrangement: daily repentance, mutual accountability, and the constant awareness that we are all capable of serious error.

How fortunate for the rest of us that these specially protected leaders exist to guide us.

After all, what could possibly go wrong when the people in charge believe God Himself has promised to stop them from ever making a truly catastrophic mistake?

Nothing. 

Absolutely nothing.

Except, of course, all the times it has.

From Morning Stars to Martian Puppet Masters: Wade Cox Makes History, Aviation, and Basic Logic Look Stupid in One Glorious Brain Fart

 

Wade Cox’s “Transfer of the Rule of the Morning Stars” has ben posted in the so-called "Christian" Churches of God Facebook page as if it is propehcy timeline detailing the endtimes. It is a fever-dream asinine load of garbage written by an Armstrongite splinter-group coordinator, who, like Bob Thiel has apparently decided that the Bible is too vague and needs his personal charts of doom attached to it.

Wade Cox, self-appointed Coordinator General of the "Christian" Churches of God and professional date-setter, has graced us with yet another masterpiece of eschatological fanfiction. This time he’s not content with just moving the apocalypse to 2030 and blaming the Hillel calendar for everything. No — he’s now claiming the Fallen Host (disguised as aliens)actually started the American Civil War and every single war since then. He also insists the US government has been reverse-engineering demonic spacecraft technology to design new aircraft.

This is the same theological sludge (but with added twaddle)that has been peddled by various Armstrongite offshoots for decades: British-Israelite-adjacent tribalism, obsessive Old Testament legalism, rabid anti-Trinitarianism, and a pathological need to set dates that the Bible explicitly forbids anyone from setting. Cox just adds extra layers of calendar autism and a cast of thousands of demons, popes being executed on Roman hills, sapce aliens, interstellar techonolgy, Islam, and humans turning into literal elohim (little gods). It is blatant heresy from start to finish, and it deserves to be mocked with the full force of sarcasm it has earned.The Date-Setting Industrial Complex (Because Matthew 24:36 Is Just a Suggestion)Cox has the entire end of the world choreographed down to the day:

• Time of the End allegedly began at Purim 2026 (early March).
• WWIII / Sixth Trumpet war kills a third of mankind.
• Empire of the Beast consolidates by Trumpets 2026.
• Two Witnesses (Enoch & Elijah) arrive at Atonement/Jubilee ~September 20-21, 2026.
• They die on or around March 28/31, 2030.
• Christ returns March/April 2030 (Day 1264 of their ministry).
• Second Exodus finishes by Day 1335.

As of July 7, 2026, we are supposedly deep into the Great Tribulation, with the Northern armies (Russia/East) having already swept into Europe, destroyed NATO, occupied the Middle East, reduced Damascus to rubble, set up military HQ in Gaza, and generally been busy killing hundreds of millions while the Beast power takes over the planet.

Instead, the big news is a NATO summit in Ankara, ongoing Russia-Ukraine tensions, and some Iran-related strikes in the Strait of Hormuz. 

• No global thermonuclear exchange. 
• No third of humanity dead. 
• No Witnesses calling fire from heaven on the Temple Mount. 
• No concentration camps for Trinitarian clergy. 

Just another summer of geopolitical posturing.

This is the same genre of prophecy that Herbert Armstrong used to sell magazines with. His big one was 1975. It didn’t happen. The splinters have been moving the goalposts ever since. Cox is just the latest guy with a spreadsheet and a Messiah complex.The Bible says no one knows the day or the hour (Matthew 24:36). Cox has not only named the day, he has named the *intercalary month* and whether it’s a Sabbath or not. That isn’t boldness. That’s the theological equivalent of writing “I know better than Jesus” in crayon.

Cox has the end of the world choreographed down to the day, including the exact intercalary month. The Bible says no one knows the day or the hour. Cox has not only named the day — he has blamed aliens for starting the Civil War to set the whole timeline in motion.

As of right now in July 2026 his “Time of the End” that supposedly began at Purim has produced… nothing apocalyptic. The demons must be slacking. Or maybe they’re too busy helping the US Air Force design the next stealth fighter.

In his article he discusses the Godhead.

The Godhead According to Cox: Satan Was the Morning Star Landlord for 6,000 YearsIn Cox’s cosmology:

• There is “Eloah” (the One True God).
• There are multiple “elohim” (gods).
• Satan (the other Morning Star) was literally put in charge of Earth by God for the full 6,000 years.
• Christ is the subordinate Elohim who gets the job in 2030.
• The fallen host will be sent to “the Pit of Tartaros in the Euphrates Basin.”
• The elect will be resurrected as elohim (gods) to rule with Christ.

Cox’s view of God is already heretical nonsense — multiple elohim, Christ as subordinate, humans becoming little gods, Satan as literal planetary CEO for 6,000 years. Now he’s added that these same space demons started the bloodiest war in American history. Calling mainstream Christianity “Baal worship” while claiming UFOs kicked off the Civil War is peak cultic inversion. The early church would have laughed this man out of the room just as the modern church today does.

This is not Christianity. This is warmed-over Arianism with a side of polytheism and a Satan who is basically God’s property manager who got a bit handsy with the tenants. It directly contradicts the biblical presentation of the one true God in three Persons, the full deity of Christ (John 1:1, Colossians 2:9, Hebrews 1:3, etc.), and the complete defeat of Satan at the cross rather than him being a divinely appointed planetary CEO until 2030.

Calling Trinitarian Christianity “Baal worship” and “Satanic Sun Cult” while promoting this two-Morning-Stars, humans-become-gods nonsense is peak cultic inversion. The early church spent centuries fighting exactly this kind of subordinationist garbage. Cox has simply resurrected it with extra end-times cosplay.Calendar Fetishism: The One True Faith Is Getting the New Moons RightAccording to Cox, the single most important issue in the last days is whether you use the “Temple Calendar” or the evil, Satanic, Hillel (rabbinic) calendar. Hillel intercalation in 2026 makes the entire Jubilee year “a month late” and therefore zero days of it are under God’s protection. So if you’re keeping the wrong calendar in 2027, Satan can apparently smite you with impunity on every single feast day.The Witnesses will apparently spend their first 90 days educating people on the correct calendar and then start hitting non-compliant rabbis, Sardis/Laodicean ministers, and random church members with the plagues of Egypt (boils, hemorrhoids, the works) until they submit.This is not biblical Christianity. This is Pharisaic legalism on bath salts. The New Testament is crystal clear that the shadows (including calendar regulations) were fulfilled in Christ (Colossians 2:16-17). Cox has turned the calendar into a salvation issue and a mechanism for divine smiting. It is grotesque.

Only the correct Temple Calendar gives God’s protection. Wrong calendar? Space demons can smite you. And apparently those same demons were busy starting the Civil War in 1861 while arguing about intercalation.

Cox has turned salvation into an argument over New Moons while simultaneously claiming aliens caused every war in modern history. The man’s brain is a special kind of place.

The Two Witnesses FanficEnoch and Elijah show up on the Temple Mount with power to:

• Stop the rain for 3.5 years
• Call fire from heaven
• Send whatever plagues they feel like
• Cause earthquakes

They will also apparently start executing Sunday-keeping Trinitarians in Jerusalem on arrival.The Bible never names the Two Witnesses. Cox’s choice of Enoch and Elijah is common in some circles but still speculative. Turning them into a supernatural hit squad that enforces the Temple Calendar with hemorrhoids is pure creative writing. The idea that these two men will be running around Jerusalem in 2027-2030 zapping people for wrong feast observance while the Beast power is supposedly in charge is cinematic nonsense.

Enoch and Elijah will show up with superpowers to enforce the calendar. But first, according to Cox, their demonic counterparts already did the hard work of starting the Civil War, WWI, WWII, Korea, Vietnam, and everything else.Because obviously the real reason 620,000 Americans died wasn’t slavery or union or economics. It was space demons testing humanity’s worthiness for the First Resurrection. 

Wade’s historical scholarship is truly groundbreaking. By which I mean it’s in the ground where actual history is buried.

Cox now claims the Fallen Host, appearing as aliens, didn’t just use the American Civil War — they started it. They whispered into the ears of both sides, engineered the division, and ensured maximum bloodshed to weaken America for their long-term takeover.

And it didn’t stop there. Every war since 1861 — World Wars, Korea, Vietnam, Gulf Wars, current conflicts — all orchestrated by the same extraterrestrial deceivers.

[Let that sink in. According to Wade Cox, the real cause of the Civil War was not 4 million enslaved human beings or states’ rights or economic systems. It was gray aliens in flying saucers who wanted to set up WWIII in 2026. Gettysburg was apparently a UFO hotspot. Appomattox was just the aliens getting bored. This is not theology. This is a man who watched too many History Channel alien shows and decided to write his own fanfiction while ignoring every actual history book ever printed.]

He further insists the US Government has been reverse-engineering the demons’ spacecraft technology since WWII to design and build new aircraft. Your fighter jets, stealth bombers, and “next-gen” planes are not the product of human engineers at Lockheed or Boeing. They are stolen demonic alien tech.

[Yes, Wade. The F-35 Lightning II was clearly reverse-engineered from a captured UFO that also happened to start the Civil War 160 years earlier. Human ingenuity is apparently impossible without help from the same space demons who are also running the Hillel calendar conspiracy. The SR-71 Blackbird? Obviously a Tartaros prototype with a fresh paint job. This level of stupidity is almost impressive. Almost.]

The man who can’t get basic 19th-century American history right is also the man who knows the exact day in 2030 when Christ returns. The same man whose 2026 predictions have already failed spectacularly. The same man who thinks your airplane was built with space demon parts.This isn’t just wrong. This is historically illiterate, prophetically bankrupt, and comically stupid.

The Empire of the Beast and the Rest of the Raving

Cox details the Beast power, the destruction of Trinitarian systems, concentration camps for false teachers, a “tithe of the tithe” of 90 million special people, and the Second Exodus by Day 1335.Now with the exciting new twist that aliens started all of it in 1861.

When 2030 arrives and nothing happens (again), Cox will move the goalposts. The aliens will be blamed for the delay. The calendar will be blamed. Everyone who laughed at him will be blamed. Never once will he consider that maybe — just maybe — claiming space demons started the Civil War and built the US Air Force makes him look like a complete idiot.

The Rest of the Raving Insantity:

• Detailed scenarios of popes being dragged over the bodies of their priests and executed on Roman hills.
• Concentration camps for false priests, imams, and teachers until the survivors can be “re-educated” not to want to kill them.
• A “tithe of the tithe” — roughly 90 million special people extracted from 9+ billion to become the Holy Seed and future leaders.
• Demons still influencing people even after they’re supposedly defeated.
• The entire non-Cox-compliant world being either converted or dead by 2030.

It is apocalyptic pornography dressed up as exegesis. Every failed date-setting cult in history has produced exactly this kind of granular, confident nonsense right before their dates quietly expire and everyone pretends it was “symbolic” or “conditional.”VerdictWade Cox’s article is a masterclass in everything wrong with date-setting, legalistic, anti-Trinitarian Armstrongite splinter groups. It takes genuine biblical themes (the return of Christ, judgment, the importance of obedience), twists them into a grotesque legalistic timeline, adds a completely unbiblical view of God and Satan, and then has the audacity to present it as “the sequence” that Scripture demands we follow.It is heresy. It is false prophecy. It is the theological equivalent of a man standing on a street corner with a sandwich board that says “THE END IS NIGH… AND I HAVE THE EXACT DATE AND THE CORRECT CALENDAR SYSTEM.”

The tragedy is that people get sucked into these systems, terrified of the wrong calendar or the wrong baptism or not keeping the feasts correctly, while the actual Gospel — salvation by grace through faith in the finished work of the fully divine Christ — gets buried under 6000-year timelines and hemorrhoid plagues.

When 2030 comes and goes without the Second Exodus or the 144,000 serving Christ in a rebuilt Temple while 90 million Holy Seed people run the world, Cox and his followers will do what every other failed date-setter has done: move the goalposts, claim “we never set an exact date,” or blame the lack of repentance.The Bible has already told us how to spot this stuff. Beware of false prophets. This one is particularly loud, particularly detailed, and particularly wrong.

This is not prophecy.

This is not scholarship.

This is a man making himself look spectacularly, historically, and prophetically stupid in real time.

As of July 2026 his timeline is already in the dumpster. Adding “space demons did Gettysburg” to the pile doesn’t save it — it just makes the dumpster fire brighter and funnier.The Bible already told us how to spot this stuff. Beware of false prophets. This one isn’t just false — he’s historically illiterate and aviation-conspiracy-level absurd.When the dates keep failing, the only thing left for Cox to blame will be the aliens he invented to explain why he’s always wrong

Silent Pilgrim

UCG - 19 Years of Repeatedly Saying: "...this has been the most spiritually productive series of meetings that I have yet experienced."

I had to laugh when a reader pointed this post out to me from 2014. UCG's Council of Elders recently met, and they are saying the same damn thing. 

When this article was written, they had already spent 19 years trying to fix the church. 

Yet, here we are 13 years later, and they are still rehashing the same old issues and problems and working on ways ot correct them. Yet, here we are in 2026, and they have not fixed a thing.

The United Church of God recently finished another Council of Elders' meeting.  This has been going on for 19 years now, and every single year they say the exact same thing.  "This was the most productive and spiritually energizing meeting ever!"  "We are more unified than ever as a church."  "The ministry is more unified and excited than ever in preaching the kingdom of God"....on and on the platitudes go.  YET, for 19 years, the UCG has been a church filled with turmoil and division. Bitterness and resentfulness have always been roiling around in the background when all the positive platitudes are announced.

Robin Webber writes:

The Council of Elders of the United Church of God met in Milford, Ohio, from Dec. 7 to Dec. 11. We started on Sunday with a retreat at a nearby facility where we could collectively appeal to God for His direction. When we approach God on our knees and surrender our good ideas to His perfection, things happen!Our four days of formal meetings followed. It’s always exciting to share a “good report” (Philippians 4:8).I am now in my seventh consecutive year on the Council, and I believe that this has been the most spiritually productive series of meetings that I have yet experienced.

All the elders sat around the table talking about the spiritual struggles they all endure in their walk as ministers.  They had this to say:

We concluded: We all—every Council and administration figure, pastor and member—need to seek an even deeper and exhaustive desire to center our thoughts, actions and underlying motivations in light of this “lamp unto our feet” (Psalm:119:105Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.) and this decisive instrument designed to discern our thoughts (Hebrews:4:12For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.)—the Bible!

The deeper desire they have to center their thoughts is more law and more Old Testament rules and regulations.  Law always trumps grace in the Church of God.  Why should I ever expect otherwise?

Webber then brings his version of Jesus into the mix:

Beyond our personal needs as individual Christians, we also affirmed our God-given responsibility to not only “tend” (John:21:16He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep.), but also to “feed the flock” (John:21:15-17[15]So when they had dined, Jesus saith to Simon Peter, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me more than these? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my lambs.[16]He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my sheep.[17]He saith unto him the third time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, Feed my sheep.). That is, to feed the flock directly and correctly from the living Word of God. It’s the Council’s resolve to go even deeper in establishing the Church’s mooring and understanding on the Word of God. Just like the deer described in Psalms, panting for the water brooks, we too must pant for the Word of God (Psalm:42:1As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God.).

It can be guaranteed that when the UCG Council says it will go "deeper" in understanding God's Word, it will be about the law.  The things that they feel are required for one to make it to Petra.  Grace and justification will get short-shifted to law keeping.

Recent attendee surveys speak to the brethren’s desire to go deeper into God’s Word and have our ministry draw out the rich meanings underneath the surface in God’s Holy Word—be it doctrine, Christian living or prophecy. And to that end, based on multiple comments from the recent surveys, we are moving forward as soon as personnel and resources allow to engaging our membership once again with the Bible Commentary (also called the Bible Reading Program).

It's a shame that the members of the UCG or any Church of God for that matter, do not feel empowered to do their own study of the Scriptures.  They always have to rely upon the theologically bankrupt ministers making personal decisions on what to believe and to do.  99% of the men in the UCG have never studied the Bible without an HWA booklet or UCG article in hand to tell them what to believe.  They have never dealt with biblical criticism, metaphors, or real church history.  They mock and frown upon anyone who studies in a seminary where truly educated men and women have more research and understanding under their belts than any COG leader will EVER have!

Webber then announced that the UCG is dropping the name of the Good News magazine for a new name.  It has been a bone of contention in many of the COG's because several of the personality cults are using the same name for their own use.  Every single one of them stole it from WCG without asking because they thought it brought warm, fuzzy memories of HWA into the nix.  Having a name he chose made them feel their magazine was more legitimate in the church members' eyes.  The problem that has arisen over the almost three decades after HWA's death is that no one remembers who he was or CARES!  No matter how hard they plug the guy's name or hang pictures on their walls, people no longer respond to his name.

I’m also pleased to bring exciting news regarding our major publication The Good News.The Council and the administration have discussed for nearly a two-year period how to: 1) simplify the pathway for people to access our various media outlets, 2) while at the same time magnifying the ongoing impact of what we can share in their spiritual journey. The Council members (11 were present) unanimously decided to approve the administration’s proposal to change the name of The Good News to Beyond Today, which coincides with the title of our television program.

Why? Currently, no one can have full rights to the “Good News” name—which multiple organizations use every day. There are multiple Good News magazines used by a variety of organizations. It’s in the public domain. But we do have the trademark (service mark for non-profits) to Beyond Today. The subtitle is projected to read: “Help for Today, Hope for Tomorrow,” which defines our writing and engages the audience in the wide framework of our calling to be followers of Jesus Christ today, while looking towards the ultimate hope of God’s Kingdom.

Given the massive failure the UCG suffered with its latest media campaign using the Beyond Today program, I wonder what is going through their minds, thinking that with a new name change, it will increase readership?   No one in the "world" cares to be lectured about paganism, being burdened down with numerous laws and regulations, all the while Jesus is ignored. Empty platitudes about a "soon coming kingdom" do nothing to help alleviate pain and suffering in the here and now.  Blabbering on and on about HWA and Old Testament rules does nothing to promote peace, unconditional love, and grace.

Like everything else in the COG these "new" ideas will not bring in new members or increase their funds.  UCG is doomed to rot away into oblivion just like all the other COG's currently are.  For 19 years now, they have been saying the same phrase.  For 19 years, NOTHING has changed.

Are You A PIMO? A Reluctant Prisoner Of The Church of God?

Anyone who has participated in or read the stories from ex-Mormon, ex-Jehovah’s Witnesses, ex-Seventh-day Adventist, and countless other ex-high-control religious groups will recognize the term PIMO being thrown around constantly.

PIMO stands for Physically In, Mentally Out. It describes someone who still attends services, goes through the motions, and keeps up appearances — while their heart and mind checked out long ago. They’re not believers anymore, but they’re stuck pretending. Most of the time it’s to keep peace in the extended family, preserve a marriage, or wait until the kids are old enough to make their own decisions without being dragged to every church activity and youth-group hangout with their friends. The gravitational pull of that tight-knit community — or the sheer terror of losing it — often outweighs the desire to walk away free and clear.

This isn’t some rare quirk. It’s a feature, not a bug, of high-control groups.

In Jehovah’s Witnesses circles, PIMOs are practically a demographic. The organization’s shunning policy turns leaving into social and familial death. Walk away openly and your own parents or siblings may refuse to speak to you — even at a funeral. So thousands quietly attend meetings, nod along during talks about “the truth,” do the bare-minimum field service when required, and keep their doubts buried. They act the part to avoid being labeled apostates and cut off from everyone they love. It’s emotional blackmail packaged as “loving discipline,” and it works disturbingly well. 

Over in Mormon (LDS) communities, the story is just as common. Ex-Mormon forums overflow with accounts of people who still show up to sacrament meeting, hold (or fake) callings, and keep paying tithing on paper — because openly questioning could cost them their “eternal family” sealings or trigger the cold shoulder from in-laws and ward members. “Cafeteria Mormons” take the selective route: they keep the parts they like (community, certain moral teachings) and memory-hole the rest (historical polygamy, Book of Mormon historicity, etc.). Smile, bear testimony when the script demands it, and maintain family peace at all costs.

Even among Seventh-day Adventists, you’ll find plenty of PIMOs and their “cafeteria” cousins. People dutifully keep the Sabbath, skip the pork, and show up for potlucks while privately rolling their eyes at Ellen White’s writings or the more rigid end-times predictions. They stay because leaving would disappoint Grandma, strain the marriage, or mean the kids lose their Adventist school friends and familiar routines. The social pressure is real, even without the formal shunning of the JWs.

Armstrongism has always been stuffed with these same PIMOs. That’s exactly why people still linger in the PCG, CCOG, COGWA, UCG, LCG, and RCG. Peer pressure does a lot of the heavy lifting, but there’s also the ever-present Armstrongist sword of Damocles: question too loudly or step out of line and your salvation gets revoked. Sound familiar? It’s the exact same threat used in Mormon, SDA, and JW circles.

Then comes the ultimate Armstrongist dagger: anyone who’s only physically present gets branded a Laodicean — lukewarm, spiritually lazy, and destined to be spewed out of God’s mouth. It’s a convenient biblical insult that lets the leadership dismiss doubters without ever having to address their actual concerns. “You’re just Laodicean” is Armstrongism’s version of “if you don’t like it, leave” — except leaving supposedly means losing your salvation. 

Brilliant control mechanism, really.

PIMOs are often orthoprax to the core — at least on the outside. They follow the visible rules, dress the part, talk the talk, and perform the rituals so convincingly that no one suspects a thing. They look and sound exactly like the true believers.

Just like there are cafeteria Mormons and cafeteria SDAs, there are plenty of cafeteria COGers. They pick whichever Armstrong doctrines they can stomach, memory-hole the rest, and carry on. Most of the time it’s purely to keep the peace. Because in these environments, authentic belief is optional — visible compliance is mandatory.

These groups don’t actually want your genuine faith. They want your body in the pew, your mouth shut, and your checkbook open. When real conviction evaporates, they’ll happily settle for the performance. The “loving community” that supposedly values truth above all else is often the very thing making honest departure so expensive that people feel they have no choice but to fake it indefinitely.

PIMO life might be the only survivable option for many trapped inside these systems — but it’s still a slow, soul-eroding grind

Olam and the Seventh Day

 

Olam: it’s so far that we can’t see the end.

Olam and the Seventh Day

By Scout

Wherefore the children of Israel shall keep the sabbath, to observe the sabbath throughout their generations, for a perpetual (olam, Hebrew) covenant.  It is a sign between me and the children of Israel for ever (olam, Hebrew): for in six days the LORD made heaven and earth, and on the seventh day he rested, and was refreshed. (KJV, Exodus 31:16-17)

I have said that God made the Sabbath a SEPARATE, ETERNAL, and PERPETUAL COVENANT, entirely separate and apart from what we term "the Old Covenant" made at Mt. Sinai ― Herbert W. Armstrong in his booklet “Which Day is the Christian Sabbath,” 1972.

 

 “Olam and the Seventh-day” sounds like a Disney movie about a Hebrew boy named Olam who learns about the seventh-day Sabbath.  But “olam” is, rather, a term in Hebrew that usually means “a long time” but can mean “eternity”.  The KJV translators seem to have made facile decisions about how to translate olam in the Old Testament.  I know of no documented, substantive exegesis concerning how they arrived at the decision to translate olam in its various usages in the Biblical text.   

In my examination of this issue, I will be relying extensively on the work of Dr. Eitan Bar who is an Israeli Jew and also a Christian and a graduate of the Dallas Theological Seminary.  Dr. Bar has a valuable word study of olam in his book titled, “Hellfire Deconstructed.”

Briefly, How the Old Testament Views Eternity

Eternity seems to be one of the leitmotifs of the Old Testament.  One gets the feeling of infinite duration as some scriptures are read.  If you get that feeling, the translators have probably misled you.  Dr. Eiten Bar wrote:

“One of the risks in interpreting an ancient Jewish Middle Eastern text—the Bible—from a Western perspective is the anachronism fallacy, which involves injecting modern ideas into the ancient text. This issue becomes particularly apparent when considering the concept of time.  In Western philosophy, eternity is a subject of extensive debate, but the concept, as understood today, essentially does not exist in the Near Eastern biblical context.”

The idea of infinite duration imposed on the ancient Hebrew language of the Old Testament creates an anachronism.  It is like Shakespeare writing of a striking clock in the play “Julius Caesar” when the mechanical striking clock was not invented until the Middle Ages.  The Hebrew term “olam,” which is often translated anachronistically as forever or everlasting, much later concepts, really just means something like “hidden” or “not visible” in the sense that it is beyond sight.  It means something that lasts so long or extends so far, for instance, that we cannot see the end of it from where we stand.  It does not rule out that it is finite or will one day end.  There are many Biblical examples of something that is olam and is of finite duration.  In Jeremiah 5:29, olam refers to a period of 70 years.  This issue of semantics has a direct impact on how Exodus 31:16-17, concerning the seventh-day, is interpreted. 

So, if you are reading the Old Testament and the text is laced with references to eternity, consider that your expansive mood may stem from the wrong impression, that the term olam for the most part does not mean eternity.  And it is time to read more deeply.

A Reassessment of the Seventh-Day Sabbath Covenant Text

When the Sabbath Covenant of Exodus 31 is reviewed in light of the equivocal meaning of olam, the Covenant might be eternal or it might not be. While olam refers to a finite but long duration, the term olam can also be used to mean “eternal” in at least one place in the Old Testament.  God is referred to as El Olam or the Eternal God.  Clearly, there is no finitude or possibility of a distant future ending possible in this usage.  So, how do we figure out what Olam means?  Olam means “a long time” or “eternity” depending on context. So, we must look at the context. 

Exodus 31 does not stand by itself.  In fact, nothing in the Old Testament stands by itself.  It is all under the authority of the New Testament.  This is because Jesus himself is the Word of God. The Old Testament is not superior to Jesus. It is absurd to think that Jesus was just another Torah-keeper, that the law is at the center and Jesus is peripheral. This profound transition from the Old to the New Testament is described by the Apostle John when he said, “The law indeed was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.”  Notice that Jesus brought not only grace but the truth.  Jesus brought us the true state of reality. This is one reason that the teachings of the New Testament may legitimately modify the Old Testament. 

We must reassess the seventh-day Sabbath covenant in Exodus 31.  To do this, we must see it in the context of the New Testament.  Prominent in any such review will be the Jerusalem Council’s conclusions.  Prominent will be the model of circumcision and how circumcision was transformed.   This will inevitably lead us to the conclusion that the Sabbath is still in force.  It is eternal just as Exodus 31 states.  But our rest is not in the seventh-day but in Jesus.  The line of reasoning follows.

The New Testament Rest is Not the Seventh-Day

It is important to understand that the concept of the seventh-day and the Sabbath are separate.  We know this from the New Testament.  The word Sabbath in Hebrew does not mean seventh-day or the number seven.  It means a deliberate cessation of activity, therefore, implying rest.  God implemented the Sabbath by resting from creation on the seventh-day in the allegorical language of Genesis.  (God does not need to rest in order to recharge like a human.  But he did cease from a certain kind of activity.) So, only God can re-implement the Sabbath in a different way.  Jesus said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls (Matthew 11:28-29, NRSV).” We now find our rest in Jesus. Notice this statement covers both physical and spiritual rest.  Also, in this statement, Jesus separates spiritual rest from the seventh-day by making himself the new source of rest.  The concept of rest is carried forward but the physical ritual of the seventh-day is set aside. 

This change that makes Jesus our rest tells us the intent of the language of the Sabbath Covenant in Exodus in retrospect.  It is important to again consider at this point that the seventh-day Sabbath, like circumcision, is a composite of a spiritual concept and a physical ritual.  It is composed of both spiritual rest and the physical seventh-day observance.   Olam in the Exodus 31 context does mean “eternal” but it is focused on the meaning of the Sabbath as spiritual rest rather than on the physical seventh-day. We would not know the intended usage of olam in Exodus 31 if we did not have New Testament events to refer to. It is safe to conclude that Moses did not know the full extent of what he was saying in Exodus 31 because he did not have access to New Testament revelation.  So, the change Jesus made in how the rest is to happen through him asserts the meaning of olam as eternal in regard to spiritual rest only. 

Let me hasten to add, that the observance of the seventh-day is not wrong.  I am confident that prior to 70 AD, the Jerusalem Church observed the seventh-day and, perhaps, much of the Torah.  Pauline theology and the Book of Hebrews is convincing that this observation must have been liturgical – a worship form.  The seventh-day, like circumcision, only becomes a departure from Christianity if it is asserted that its observance is a requirement for salvation. 

Conclusion

The Hebrew word olam because of its ambiguity is not by itself sufficient to decree that the seventh-day is the Sabbath for all of eternity as Herbert W. Armstrong states.  One cannot cite the Sabbath Covenant in Exodus 13 as a means of settling all debate.  One cannot approach the New Testament scripture with the eternity of the seventh-day observance in pocket as an already-decided issue because the New Testament has the final word.  The covenant of circumcision was also described as eternal (olam) and ceased to be the cutting in the flesh in the Old Covenant and became a matter of the heart in the New Covenant. In regard to both circumcision and the seventh-day, the spiritual meaning has been retained but the former physical implementation has ended.  This is because the New Testament gives completed, present meaning to what was intended in the Old Testament.  Jesus is the Word of God in action and the New Testament message that he brought to us supplants the Old Testament.