The Immense Pentecost That Never Was

 

Elisha’s Double Portion vs. Thiel’s Double Fantasy – A New Covenant Reality Check

Bob Thiel's "Double Portion" Claim Falls Apart Biblically (and by the Fruit Test).

Bob Thiel repeatedly points to a December 15, 2011, anointing by LCG minister Gaylyn Bonjour. During a routine laying on of hands, Bonjour (moved, he said, by the Spirit) prayed that God would grant Thiel a "double portion" of His Holy Spirit—explicitly likening it to Elisha's request from Elijah in 2 Kings 2:9. Thiel has treated this as divine validation of his prophetic office, a mantle-passing from Herbert W. Armstrong's era, and proof of special end-time anointing for his "work" in the improperly named "Continuing" Church of God (CCOG).

1. The OT "Double Portion" Was About Inheritance and Succession—Not a Bigger Dose of the Spirit

In 2 Kings 2:9, Elisha asks for a "double portion" of Elijah's spirit (ruach). This was the legal right of the firstborn son (Deuteronomy 21:17)—a double inheritance share. Elisha was requesting to be recognized as Elijah's prophetic successor, not "twice the Holy Spirit power."

Elijah's ministry involved dramatic miracles (fire from heaven, drought, etc.). Elisha did perform notable acts, but the Bible doesn't frame it as "twice the Spirit"—it was about carrying forward the prophetic office in a new era.

This was a unique transitional moment in Israel's history under the Old Covenant. It has nothing to do with New Covenant believers claiming graded levels of the Spirit.

Thiel (and some in COG circles) rips this out of context and treats it like a magical upgrade prayer that magically confers super-prophet status. That's not how Scripture works.

2. The New Testament Knows Nothing of a "Graded" or "Double" Holy Spirit

One Spirit: Ephesians 4:4 – "There is one body and one Spirit..."

Given without measure: John 3:34 (speaking of Christ, but the principle applies to the Spirit's fullness in the new era).

All believers participate equally: 1 Corinthians 12:13 – "For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body... and all were made to drink of one Spirit."

Varieties of gifts, same Spirit: 1 Corinthians 12:4 – Different manifestations, but the same Spirit distributing as He wills. No hierarchy of "Spirit levels" among believers.

Poured out on all flesh: Acts 2:33, Joel 2:28-29. Pentecost was a historic outpouring with signs appropriate to that moment in salvation history—not a model for individuals claiming bigger helpings later.

Jesus Himself: "If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!" (Luke 11:13). No fine print about "double portions for self-appointed prophets only."

The New Testament presents the Holy Spirit as the same undivided gift to all who believe (John 7:38-39; Romans 8:9, 14-16; Galatians 3:2-5; Ephesians 1:13-14). There's no biblical category for "double portion," "triple anointing," or any such invented hierarchy. It's a human invention—often used in charismatic or restorationist circles to claim special status. God the Father isn't bound by our formulaic prayers. The Spirit blows where He wishes (John 3:8).

3. Thiel's Claim Collapses Under Biblical Tests for a Prophet

Even if we grant the 2011 prayer happened exactly as described, the fruit and fulfillment tests destroy any claim of special anointing:

Deuteronomy 18:21-22: If a prophet speaks in the name of the Lord and the thing does not happen, he spoke presumptuously. Thiel has a documented track record of failed predictions, date-ish hints, and "strong possible" scenarios that fizzle, which we have chronicled here extensively

Matthew 7:15-20: "You will recognize them by their fruits." Look at the scandals in CCOG's African congregations (adultery, persecution of Priscilla, witchcraft allegations, arrests, cover-up accusations involving named leaders like Evans Ocheing, etc.). Thiel's responses often involve deflection, attacks on critics, and doubling down rather than humble repentance or correction. Narcissistic patterns, heavy emphasis on his own dreams/interpretations, and authoritarian top-down control don't scream "double portion of the Spirit of Christ" (who was meek and lowly).

Galatians 5:22-23: The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Contrast that with the biting, accusatory tone often directed at ex-members, other COG groups, and anyone questioning his office.

The very minister involved, Gaylyn Bonjour and LCG leadership, later distanced themselves from this mythical double portion and Thiel's delusion that he was a prophet. Thiel ran with it anyway and built an entire identity around it.

4. It's Just Another COG "Mantle" Fantasy

Armstrongism has a long history of claiming special succession, restored truths, and unique anointings while rejecting the plain New Covenant reality: the veil is torn, the Spirit is poured out on all believers (Jew and Gentile, male and female, great and small), and we are all priests in Christ (1 Peter 2:9; Revelation 1:6). No need for modern "Elijahs" with double scoops of Spirit to mediate.

Thiel's "double portion" is self-serving mythology—much like other failed prophets in the movement who invoke dramatic Old Testament imagery to prop up their authority. It becomes meaningless theater when the life, teachings, and outcomes don't match the New Testament pattern of the Spirit-filled church.

Bottom line: The Holy Spirit isn't a quantifiable resource you level up like a video game character. He's a Person—the same for every believer who asks in faith. If Bob Thiel did receive the Holy Spirit, he received the same offer as every other Christian. The evidence shows he hasn't operated in any special double-portion power. The biblical record, the fruit, and the failed prophecies prove it.

This fits perfectly into the broader pattern of Armstrongist leaders inventing extra-biblical mechanisms to claim superiority. The real freedom is in the New Covenant: one Spirit, full access through Christ, no graded anointings required. Keep exposing the wackiness—it's a public service.

hat tip to a commenter here:

The notion of a double portion of the Holy Spirit intrigues. The phrase “double portion” comes from Elisha’s request to Elijah: “Let me inherit a double portion of your spirit.” (2 Kings 2:9)

As a double portion was the legal right of the firstborn son (Deut 21:17).
Elisha was asking: to be Elijah’s successor, to inherit the prophetic office. This is not the same as asking for twice as much of the Holy Spirit. Something entirely different. 

In the NT in areas where we read of the Holy Spirit we see: One Spirit (Eph 4:4); Poured out (Acts 2:33); Given without measure (John 3:34); All believers drink of one Spirit (1 Cor 12:13) - there is no hint or record I can find of a double portion or a triple portion or any such notion of a graded amount. 

SO one must conclude It all seems to be an invention of men . One is left wondering whether prayers invoking a ‘double portion’ etc have any theological meaning at all? God the Father is the One who gives the Spirit, and does not get bound by some prayer of mere men. It becomes meaningless. The Spirit given is the same for all. “The Father will give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him.” Jesus said. (Luke 11:13); 

(“There are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit.” (1 Cor 12:4) and at Pentecost what is evident was a burst of manifestations appropriate to that moment in salvation history. The signs increased, not the Spirit Himself. So again there is no biblical record of a ‘bigger Spirit,’ a ‘double portion,’ or any graded hierarchy of Spirit‑levels. The Spirit remains one, undivided, and given without measure.)

Bob Thiel’s Masterclass in Meekness: How the Humblest Man Alive Heroically Resigned from LCG the Exact Second Before They Could Kick His Mantle-Bearing Behind Out

Bob Thiel, the Paragon of Meekness and God’s personally anointed mantle-bearer, so graciously left the Living Church of God before those spiritually bankrupt Philistines could summon the audacity to kick him out.

There have been these dreadfully improper reports circulating about me — Bob Thiel, the meekest, most truth-obsessed volunteer doctrinal advisor the Church of God has ever been blessed to endure. Some petty, truth-hating, Laodicean little souls have actually dared to whisper that I was kicked out of the Living Church of God. How delusional! Allow me, in my trademark overflowing modesty, to correct the record once again with yet another lovingly exhaustive manifesto proving, beyond any reasonable doubt, that I heroically stormed out first — before those clueless, mantle-less wonders could possibly have the nerve to show me the door.

The simple reason I left? 

LCG had tragically, pathetically lost the Philadelphia mantle. You know, that sacred, invisible, ever-shifting divine participation trophy that somehow always ends up pinned to the chest of whoever writes the longest self-congratulatory article. They simply didn’t value truth the way I value truth — which is to say, they didn’t immediately rewrite every booklet the instant Bob Thiel sent a strongly-worded email. And when a church has the sheer gall to disagree with me, what’s a truly humble servant to do? Stay and work through it like some pathetic, compromise-loving Laodicean? Don’t make me laugh. The only righteous, Spirit-led response is to declare the whole rotten outfit cursed (Jeremiah 48:10 — suck on that!), fire off a resignation, and found your own church within hours. Because nothing screams “I’m doing this purely for doctrinal purity” like birthing a rival organization before your old one even finishes printing the letter that called you out.

Let’s rewind to 2005, when the great Dr. Roderick C. Meredith himself — presiding evangelist, no less — personally recruited little old unpaid me to play hall monitor for the doctrinal committee. How unbelievably gracious of him. For years, I patiently, repeatedly, endlessly reminded them (with the loving persistence of a dripping faucet) of all the promises they’d made to fix their literature, doctrines, prophecy disasters, and historical howlers. Did they keep them? Of course not. These arrogant, promise-breaking ingrates actually had the nerve to keep teaching things they knew were wrong. 

Imagine the sheer, satanic wickedness of leadership that doesn’t drop everything to obey Bob Thiel the moment he points out a theological comma out of place. Shocking. Appalling. Practically criminal.

By 2011 the mask had completely disintegrated: these people treated Matthew 18 like it was some optional suggestion for the little people. Instead of following proper biblical protocol — privately confronting poor, innocent, flawless me first — they had the breathtaking, jaw-dropping temerity to criticize me publicly. In writing. To the entire church. Without first booking a sacred Bob Thiel reconciliation summit and offering me a foot massage. The absolute horror! So, rather than stoop to ordinary church discipline like some common, spineless compromiser, I concluded that LCG had forfeited the “pillar and ground of the truth.” Time to pack my bags, hit send, and launch the Continuing Church of God on the internet that very afternoon. Because the most humble thing any man can do when he disagrees with leadership is immediately start his own religion and crown himself the new Philadelphian gold standard.

Then came the unforgivable “falling away” doctrinal shift. LCG had the nerve to teach something I disagreed with — something that didn’t perfectly echo my personal, infallible exegesis of what Herbert W. Armstrong really meant. They even had the audacity to imply that dissenters had a “spirit of error.” How dare they suggest I might be the one mistaken! Clearly the sacred mantle could not possibly survive in an organization so willfully blind to the blazing, radiant light of Bob Thiel.

I also learned, to my profound and deeply wounded shock, that LCG leaders were reluctant to proclaim certain doctrines boldly because they feared losing TV stations or their precious little 501(c)(3) status. What pathetic cowards. What sniveling, compromise-ridden compromisers. Meanwhile, I, the fearless lion of Judah, was ready to roar… the moment I had my own YouTube empire and website, naturally. They even spent money trying to slow me down. The betrayal! The sheer, ungrateful audacity!

And then — the final, glorious, smoking-gun proof: December 28, 2012. Dr. Meredith sent me a letter absolutely dripping with “improper railing accusations” and “false witness.” After reading this vicious, unchristian assault on my flawless character, I did the only truly Christ-like thing possible: I called my local pastor, declared my moral inability to remain one second longer, fired off my resignation, and officially launched CCOG within hours. See? I left first. Purely voluntary. Anyone who calls this an expulsion is a filthy, truth-suppressing liar spreading improper reports. Case closed, you miserable slanderers.

But we mustn’t forget the mandatory mantle-passing fan fiction, because what would a Bob Thiel article be without it? Multiple LCG evangelists — including Meredith himself — repeatedly told me God “may consider” me a prophet. One even accidentally bestowed a “double-portion” anointing straight out of 2 Kings 2. I responded with the perfect, jaw-dropping humility you’d expect by spending the next decade meticulously cataloging every whispered compliment, complete with timestamps, screenshots, email chains, and solemn declarations that it was definitely God, not my ego the size of a small planet, at work.

Oh, and the fruits — never, ever forget the fruits! While LCG was pathetically groveling on its knees begging God for a measly 15% growth, CCOG exploded like a doctrinal supernova — fastest-growing xWCG group in the 21st century, touching 220 countries, millions of views, etc. Clearly God’s personal, glowing seal of approval on my decision to leave before those mantle-less heathens could kick me out. (Dr. Meredith even emailed me in February 2013 begging me to come back. Proof positive I wasn’t expelled! Who on earth pleads with a kicked-out heretic to return? Exactly.)

So here’s my humble little challenge, you remaining LCG holdouts still foolish enough to imagine they might have the Philadelphia mantle: read every single article I’ve ever written, watch every single video, study every doctrinal nit I’ve ever picked, and then admit I was right all along. Or keep wallowing in your pathetic Laodicean delusion, you poor, deluded, blind-as-bats sheep.

In summary, I — Bob Thiel, anointed prophet, mantle-bearer extraordinaire, fastest-growing-church founder, and the only man humble enough to start an entire new organization the same day he dramatically quit the old one — left LCG because of their shocking lack of integrity, their stubborn refusal to bow before my corrections, their blatant violation of Matthew 18, and their unforgivable failure to recognize that the mantle had obviously, gloriously, and permanently passed to me the moment Gaylyn Bonjour muttered “double portion.” I was not kicked out. I left voluntarily, like the noble, self-sacrificing hero of every single Armstrongist splinter story ever written.

You’re welcome, Church of God world. The final phase of the work is now safely in the only hands pure and humble enough to handle it.

Why There is NO NEED For Prophets In The New Covenant and Any COG Leader Today Who Claims They Are One, Is A Liar

Biblical Tests for Prophets: Straight from Scripture, No Loopholes Allowed

The Bible doesn't leave us guessing on how to identify a true prophet versus a false one—especially crucial when Armstrongism's landscape is littered with self-proclaimed "Elijahs," "Zerubbabels," and "prophets" whose track records read like a comedy of errors. Deuteronomy 18:15-22 is the gold standard for the office. God promises a prophet like Moses, but the test is ironclad: "When a prophet speaks in the name of the Lord, if the word does not come to pass or come true, that is a word that the Lord has not spoken; the prophet has spoken it presumptuously. You need not be afraid of him" (Deuteronomy 18:22, ESV). One miss, and they're out. No "it was conditional," no frantic booklet revisions, no "well, it partially came true in a spiritual sense." True prophets get it right—100%.

Deuteronomy 13 adds another layer: Even if signs or wonders come to pass, if the "prophet" leads you after other gods or away from God's commandments (as revealed at the time), they're false. In the New Covenant era, this translates to anything contradicting the finished work of Christ or adding to the closed canon. Jesus Himself warned, "Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will recognize them by their fruits" (Matthew 7:15-16). Fruits include doctrine, character, financial integrity, and whether their message produces freedom in Christ or bondage, fear, and tithing pressure.

The New Testament reinforces this. "Do not despise prophecies, but test everything; hold fast what is good" (1 Thessalonians 5:20-21). "Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world" (1 John 4:1). Testing involves alignment with Scripture, the fruit of the Spirit (not narcissism or control), and consistency with the gospel of grace. Prophets in the NT church (Ephesians 4:11) were foundational for the early era, often involved in forth-telling truth or specific guidance, but the office isn't a perpetual hierarchy demanding ongoing "new truth" beyond the Bible. The completed canon and indwelling Spirit equip every believer (2 Timothy 3:16-17; John 16:13).

Bob Thiel's Claims as a Case Study in Failing the Tests

Bob Thiel (Bwana Bob, the self-styled Crackpot Prophet of the Continuing Church of God) provides a textbook example of why these tests matter—and why modern claimants fall flat. He has an in-depth article on his sites titled "How To Determine If Someone is a True Prophet of God," where he lays out criteria, cites dreams, anointings, comments from Roderick Meredith, and more to justify his role.

On December 15, 2011, I was anointed with oil by a Living Church of God minister (Gaylyn Bonjour) who prayed God would grant me a 'double-portion' of His Holy Spirit. This was not planned by him in advance, but happened after I asked for prayer related to some meetings I was to have. He later confirmed that what he did could not be undone. I also had dreams consistent with how God says He communicates with prophets (Numbers 12:6; Acts 2:17-18). Dr. Meredith had earlier stated that God may consider me to be a prophet. ... In my case, I have not made false prophecies, but have had the relatively few I have made confirmed... On October 3, 2008, Dr. Roderick C. Meredith... stated that God may consider me to be a prophet... In late January/early February 2009, Dr. Meredith told me over the telephone that if he (Dr. Meredith) was raised to the office of apostle, he was considering ordaining me (Bob Thiel) as a prophet... The CCOG has the signs/fruits and fruits of Acts 2:17-18, including the fruits of a prophet... CCOG has been the fastest growing COG in the 21st century.

But apply the actual biblical tests, and it unravels. His framework rests on Herbert W. Armstrong's discredited British Israelism, failed 1975 prophecies (which he defends or reinterprets), and a legalistic Old Covenant shadow that the New Covenant renders obsolete. Dreams and vague "warnings" about geopolitics are spun post-hoc as fulfillment—classic false prophet tactics. Deuteronomy 18 demands precise predictive accuracy, not elastic news analysis that can be retrofitted. His "fruits"? Division, attacks on critics (including ex-members exposing scandals like those in Kenya), heavy emphasis on tithing and his unique role, and a track record of propping up a system rife with authoritarianism and unfulfilled end-time dates across COG splinters. Jesus said you'd know them by fruits, not by self-published articles defending one's own prophethood or membership tallies that ignore quality, doctrine, or the New Covenant's freedom from such hierarchies. Thiel's approach sidesteps the New Covenant's sufficiency, turning "prophecy" into a perpetual fundraising and control mechanism rather than pointing to Christ's completed work.

This isn't unique to Thiel—it's the Armstrongist pattern: endless "prophets" chasing relevance through speculation while ignoring the clear biblical verdict on their predecessors' flops.

Resting in the Superior New Covenant Reality

In the end, the proliferation of "crazy men" in Armstrongism isn't a bug—it's the inevitable feature of clinging to an outdated, hierarchical model that the New Covenant explicitly surpasses. Hebrews 1:1-2 declares it plainly: God spoke through prophets in the past, but now He has spoken fully and finally through His Son. Jesus is the Prophet par excellence (Deuteronomy 18:15 fulfilled), the Great High Priest, and the King whose kingdom is not built on endless middlemen but on direct access for all believers. The New Covenant, promised in Jeremiah 31:31-34 and unpacked in Hebrews 8-10, internalizes God's law on our hearts, ensures we all know Him without a special class of intermediaries, and secures complete forgiveness—rendering the old system's shadows (including ongoing prophetic offices for new revelation) obsolete.

The foundation of apostles and prophets (with Christ the cornerstone) was laid once for all (Ephesians 2:20). We build on it today through teaching, pastoring, and the ordinary gifts of the Spirit, not by awaiting the next "Elijah" to rewrite doctrine or set dates. The canon is closed; adding to it or claiming extra-biblical authority invites the warnings of Revelation 22:18-19. The Holy Spirit, given to all at Pentecost, guides, convicts, and equips—no need for self-appointed watchmen demanding allegiance and cash while their predictions crumble or their "double portions" and dreams conveniently affirm their own authority.

Armstrongism's endless parade of false prophets—like Thiel's elaborate self-justification via anointings, selective Meredith quotes, dream interpretations, and growth stats—exposes the bankruptcy of that system: it produces fear, division, financial exploitation, and disillusioned lives rather than the freedom, joy, and fruitfulness of resting in Christ's finished work. Sarcasm aside, it's heartbreaking—families fractured, vulnerable people exploited (including those African congregations dealing with real scandals), all in the name of "restoring" something Jesus already perfected. The biblical tests exist precisely to protect us from this. Test everything against Scripture. Hold fast to the good. Reject the wolves in prophetic sheep's clothing who fail Deuteronomy's accuracy standard and Jesus' fruit test.

The beauty of the New Covenant is this: You don't need the latest COG "prophet" to navigate the times. You have the living Word, the indwelling Spirit, and the completed revelation in Christ. That's abundance, not lack. Walk in that freedom, expose the wackiness where it persists, and let the clown car of self-proclaimed Elijahs—complete with their in-depth articles proving their own specialness—fade into irrelevance. The true Prophet has spoken—everything else is just noise.

Look at Me! I’m an Intellectual! Crackpot Bob's Latest Sabbath Persecution Factoid Frenzy

Crackpot Bob, the self-anointed greatest prophet in the entire annals of Christian history (according to the only person who matters: himself), has blessed the world with yet another sermon on Sabbath Persecution. What a shock! These COG "prophets" really do have the creative range of a broken record player stuck on "fear, doom, and send in more money." Can't let the sheeple get too comfortable, after all. Got to keep them whipped into a perpetual state of paranoia and tithing frenzy. It's the standard operating procedure for these groups—same sermon, different title, endless reruns.

This latest masterpiece is classic Crackpot Bob: pretending to be some towering intellectual while desperately papering over the vast empty spaces in his knowledge with an avalanche of disconnected factoids. Forget developing three or four solid points and actually delving into them with depth and clarity. No, that would require real preaching skill. Instead, Bob machine-guns his listeners with trivia, historical scraps, and speculative "what ifs" until their eyes glaze over. Even the old Worldwide Church of God, that one holy catholic Mother Church of Armstrongism, laid this out plainly in their Spokesman Club Manual—which, according to multiple accounts, our double-blessed wonder never quite managed to finish.

But of course, every Crackpot Bob sermon must ultimately circle back to the main attraction: Bob Thiel. Look at me! See how much I pretend to know! Aren't you impressed by my research? God gave me a double blessing so I could share all this truth with you lucky few! Aren't I just the greatest thing since sliced unleavened bread? It's less a sermon and more a prolonged humblebrag wrapped in end-time paranoia.

Anyway, as Crackpot Bob loves to drone on, here are the "points" from his sermon:

Jesus said His followers would face persecution and should pray that their fleeing would not be on the Sabbath. The Bible clearly teaches that those who keep God’s commandments will be persecuted (Revelation 12:17; 14:12-13), and the Sabbath is one of them (Exodus 20:8). 

• In the 19th century, Seventh-day Adventist Ellen G. White predicted that a ‘National Sunday Law’ would originate in the United States which would result in the persecution of Sabbath keepers around the world–is that consistent with Bible prophecy? 

• The original Christians kept the Sabbath. When and why did the Greco-Roman Catholics adopt Sunday? 

• Was cowardice during the reign of Emperor Hadrian a factor? 

• What about the sun worshiping, cross promoting, Emperor Constantine and his ‘Edict Against Heretics’? 

• Were the faithful grouped with the unfaithful by him? 

• Did Pope Gregory I denounce Sabbath promoters as the “preachers of Antichrist” in an official papal pronouncement? 

• Were many supposedly killed as Jews during the Spanish Inquisition actually Christians and others who kept the Sabbath? 

• Have some Greco-Roman Catholic prophecies related to the final Antichrist been misapplied to be against Jesus when He returns? 

• Might some of them also been misapplied by referring to the coming two witnesses of Revelation 11 as false prophets? 

• Does the New Testament enjoin the Sabbath? 

• Are Gentiles prophesied to keep the Sabbath? 

• Do some Greco-Roman Catholic prophecies teach that those who have crosses on their foreheads will fight against those who do not have them? 

• Is there an Eastern Orthodox prophecy against a former Roman Catholic who lived in the ‘five cities’ who advocates the Sabbath? 

• Is a public executioner of the Sabbatians (Sabbath keepers) prophesied? 

• Do the prophesies in Revelation and Daniel support the view of two different times of murderous persecution, with the second period lasting 3 1/2 years (time, times, and half a time) or 42 months? 

• Does the Bible show that true Christians will be beheaded in Revelation 20? 

• Does the Bible show that true Christians (such as Philadelphian ones) will be burnt to death? 

• If so, are there any Greco-Roman prophecies or past practices consistent with that? 

• What is the only doctrine of Antichrist listed in the latest ‘Catechism of the Catholic Church’? 

• Are there ties between the Sabbath and the millennium and a 6000/7000 year plan? 

• Did the old Radio/Worldwide Church of God tie the prophecies in Daniel 11:32-35 to end time Philadelphian Christians? 

• Could the ‘Great Monarch’ of Greco-Roman Catholic prophecies be the coming European King of the North Beast power that the Bible warns against? 

• Will there be false Christians who pretend that they are real true Church of God Christians? 

• What day of the week did the original catholic church honor? 

• When will persecutions against Sabbath keepers end? 

• Does the Bible show that Jesus will return, establish the kingdom of God to rule the earth, and bless those that keep the Sabbath? 

Dr. Thiel addresses these issues and more.

And more... and more... Who the hell is still paying attention after the first twenty factoid dumps?

In the end, this is why the old Worldwide Church of God, the Global Church of God, and the Living Church of God all refused to ordain him. They knew the truth that his loyal followers refuse to admit: Bob Thiel is simply not an effective speaker or leader. He couldn't preach a coherent, engaging sermon to save his life, let alone build and shepherd a healthy congregation. So instead of accepting that reality, he declared himself a prophet, started his own group, and now floods the internet with these rambling data dumps disguised as divine revelation. It's the same old Armstrongist playbook—fear-mongering about persecution that never quite arrives on schedule, mixed with self-promotion and historical trivia that mostly proves one thing: Crackpot Bob can copy and paste better than he can preach.

Meanwhile, actual New Covenant believers rest in the finished work of Christ rather than obsessing over which day of the week will trigger the next Inquisition. The real tragedy isn't the supposed coming Sunday Law—it's how many sincere people are still trapped listening to this endless parade of speculation, propping up a man who was rejected by every major COG organization for good reason. 

Keep watching, brethren. The only real persecution here is what Crackpot Bob's sermons inflict on common sense and attention spans.

The Real Story of the First One Hundred Years of the Church

 The Real Story of the First One Hundred Years of the Church

Lonnie Hendrix

Shortly after Herbert Armstrong became affiliated with the Church of God, Seventh-Day in Oregon, two of his associates collaborated in writing A History of the True Religion From 33 A.D. to Date. Andrew Dugger and Clarence Dodd published their work almost one hundred years ago, and it has largely remained the way that these Sabbatarians recount the history of their organizations since it was published. Unlike other Sabbath-keeping Christians (e.g. Seventh-Day Baptists and Seventh-Day Adventists), these folks have insisted on claiming that there has always been a group of Christians who kept the Sabbath – from the Church’s foundation up to the present time. The premise is that those Sabbath-keeping folks constituted the “true” Church down through history, and that all Sunday-keeping Christians represent a “false” brand of the faith.

In Dugger’s and Dodd’s words: 

A history of the true Church of God could not be written without taking into consideration the lives and work of the outstanding leaders of the Gospel Age, that is, the apostles Paul, Peter and John; for by, or under their direction, most of the New Testament Scriptures were written, and the fortunes of the church advanced during the first century, and fashioned for future centuries. 

While there is nothing wrong with this statement, Dugger and Dodd used it to wipe out a great deal of real Church history. After going through a brief summary of the work of those three men, they wrote: 

It has already been shown that the New Testament name for the true church organized by Jesus Christ was the ‘Church of God,’ and as we leave the New Testament writings and launch out into secular history, which we must do, as the New Testament narrative only carries us to about 96 A.D., we will find the same name brought to view down through the Gospel Age. These people, however, have always been called, by their enemies, by other names. The name ‘Nazarenes,’ applied to them by the world, during the first period following the days of the apostles, will be considered first.

Did you catch that? They want to start their history in 96 A.D. – assuming that the writings of those three men support their position, and that nothing else happened between 33 A.D. and that year to contradict their narrative!

Similarly, in his booklet Where is the True Church? (1984), Herbert Armstrong wrote: 

So it was, that before A.D. 50 (the Church had been founded in A.D. 31) a fierce controversy arose as to whether the gospel to be proclaimed was the gospel OF Christ, or a gospel ABOUT Christ. Soon the curtain was wrung down on historic records of the Church. It evidenced the fact that a vigorous cooperative and systematic effort was made to destroy historic records of church happenings of the next hundred years. It was the ‘LOST CENTURY’ in church history. When the curtain of history is raised about A.D. 150, it reveals a church calling itself ‘Christian,’ but one totally different from the Church Jesus founded through his apostles in A.D. 31. 

Now, once again, the reader will notice that Armstrong ignores a century of Church history and doesn’t support any of his statements with any sources or evidence!

Even so, Mr. Armstrong’s successors among the Armstrong Churches of God have adopted a similar narrative about the origins of their organizations. In his Where Is the True Church? and Its Incredible History! (June 2026), David Pack wrote: 

John’s death, in about AD 100, ended the apostolic era and what constituted most of what is considered the Ephesian Era. We have covered some of the details of where the apostles served and aspects of their work. Polycarp introduces the Smyrna Era, but we need to backtrack and summarize certain events of the Ephesian Era, and consider their implications.

Like his mentor before him, Pack believes that the seven churches of the book of Revelation represent seven church eras. In fairness to Dave, he does go back and mention the great fire in Rome (64 CE), and Nero’s persecution of Roman Christians. Likewise, he does also mention the Roman war against the Jews, but he minimizes its impact on the Church. He went on to write: 

The majority of the Church, who were so willing to give up the truth they once embraced, proceeded to shun and condemn those who held fast to what they had all formerly believed. Those ‘Nazarenes’ who chose to remain loyal to the teaching of the apostles were accused of being divisive—deemed guilty of creating ‘schisms.’ We will see that this pattern reappears much later, near the book’s conclusion.

Once again, for Pack, these Nazarenes constituted the “true” Christians – everyone else was an apostate!

Next, we will take a brief look at the self-proclaimed Armstrong Church of God expert on the early history of the Church, Bob Thiel. In his History of Early Christianity, Thiel wrote: 

According to the New Testament, true Christianity was practiced throughout many areas of Asia Minor in the first century (this area is now in the country of Turkey). Most (between 14-20) of the 27 books of New Testament were written to or from church leaders in Asia Minor. (Even Roman Catholic and Eastern Orthodox leaders recognized that Asia Minor had early "apostolic succession"; essentially what they refer to as the early "apostolic see of Ephesus.") 

What scripture clearly shows, is that although there were Christians in various areas, the focus for the New Testament writers were the churches in Asia Minor. And interestingly, the last book of the Bible is specifically addressed to the churches of Asia Minor (Revelation 1:4,11). The last of the original apostles to die, John, died in Asia Minor and his disciple Polycarp of Smyrna was a major leader there. Those there also taught the true gospel of the kingdom and opposed others who promoted a different gospel. There were actually two major groups that claimed Christianity in the late second century that claimed succession from the apostles, and only one of them has remained faithful--for some further details, please see Early Church History: Who Were the Two Major Groups Professed Christ in the Second and Third Centuries?” Later, in the same article, he wrote: “While scholars have a variety of opinions, this page itself will simply mention the following beliefs held by true Christians in the second century, with links to highly documented articles on each subject (which are primarily based on the Bible and early historical writings). Amazingly, a leading Protestant scholar (H. Brown) has admitted: It is impossible to document what we now call orthodoxy in the first two centuries of Christianity (Brown HOJ. Heresies: Heresy and Orthodoxy in the History of the Church. Hendrickson Publishers, Peabody (MA), 1988, p. 5). In other words, much of what now passes for ‘orthodox Christianity’ did not exist in the first two centuries after Jesus was crucified and resurrected. This is basically because while there was only one original church, another major group emerged in the second century who changed certain original Christian practices and became what most now seem to feel represent ‘orthodoxy’ (for details, please see Early Church History: Who Were the Two Major Groups Professed Christ in the Second and Third Centuries?)” 

OK, I gave Bob a little more space just because he claims to be an expert!

Unfortunately, all of this Church “history” from Dugger and Dodd to Bob Thiel is inaccurate and misleading – and I’m being generous! Instead of historically accurate accounts of Church history, these men have carefully crafted historical fiction and propaganda to support their narrative that they alone represent the “TRUE” Church. By the way, a good rule of thumb: history written with an agenda or to prove a thesis never turns out to be historically accurate. The folks who write this kind of “history” are looking for evidence which supports their beliefs, and they ignore any and all evidence which contradicts their narrative!

For those of you who may be interested in the real story of what happened during the first one hundred years of the Church, I’d like to invite you to read my twelve-part series on my own blog. My narrative is evidence-based. It presents an extensive exploration of Scripture and looks at the other sources available to us from that period (e.g. the epistle of Barnabas, epistle of Clement, epistles of Ignatius, epistle of Polycarp, The Didache, The Shepherd of Hermas, Josephus, etc.) This evidence-based perspective concludes: 1) that First Century Christians were familiar with most of the writings which became our canon of the New Testament, 2) that the vast majority of Gentile Christians NEVER kept the Sabbath, Holy Days, or clean and unclean meats, 3) that Jewish Christianity was largely destroyed by the events of 70 A.D., 4) that most Christians, Jewish and Gentile, gathered on the Lord’s Day (Sunday) to fellowship and worship, 5) that pagan influences on the early Church were minimal at best. Don’t believe that my summary is accurate? I invite you to take a look at the evidence and decide for yourself.

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 1)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 2)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 3)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 4)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 5)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 6)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 7)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 8)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 9)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 10)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 11)

The First One Hundred Years of the Church (Part 12)

COGWA’s Epic 15-Year Glow-Up: From Rebellion to “Look How Virtuous We Are!”

Gather round, scattered sheep of the former Worldwide Church of God empire. Pull up a folding chair in your living-room Sabbath service and prepare to be blessed by the latest self-congratulatory press release from the one, the only, the truly virtuous Church of God, a Worldwide Association. Because according to their latest elders’ letter, COGWA has spent the last fifteen years radiating nothing but peace, productivity, and pure, unadulterated service—the noble opposite of that ugly selfishness they heroically fled from back in 2010.

From their sparkling headquarters in McKinney, Texas (because nothing says “humble service” like a slick corporate campus with assigned pastors guarding every flock), they now “serve” 104 U.S. congregations and 166 international ones—270 total little kingdoms. They even planted shiny new flags in Uganda and Australia this year. Finances? Up every single year since the split—small but consistent growth, they boast. New doors for preaching the gospel? Wide open. And for fifteen glorious years, they’ve enjoyed “peace and productivity,” which they graciously pray will continue… provided everyone keeps remembering how much holier they are than the selfish monsters they left behind.

Cue the world’s tiniest violin.

Let’s rewind to the actual origin story these folks love to airbrush. December 2010: COGWA didn’t “apostatize” in some noble doctrinal rebellion—nope, doctrines are basically identical to UCG’s. It was a classic power-grab soap opera over governance and authority. UCG’s General Council of Elders had just elected a new council more sympathetic to a less autocratic, more collegial model (you know, the whole “Council of Elders” thing they’d bragged about since forming in 1995 to avoid Herbert Armstrong-style one-man rule). The “old guard”—including future COGWA heavyweights like Jim Franks, Mike Hanisko, and Leon Walker—didn’t like it one bit. Cue the immediate triggers: personnel reassignments, communication blackouts, and demands for ministerial loyalty oaths. Hanisko later admitted the real reasons were “unethical, sometimes sinful conduct” by UCG leadership and “ungodly treatment of brethren.” (Translation: “How dare the council try to curb our hierarchical vibes?”) Earlier, when they controlled UCG, they’d already divided no fewer than 22 congregations to crush local advisory boards, building funds, and any whiff of congregational input—hundreds of elders bailed then too. But sure, now they were the selfless heroes.

The damage was biblical in scale. Over 170 elders and ministers walked out between June 2010 and March 2011 (roughly half the full-time paid pastors). About 40% of UCG’s membership—thousands of people—followed, swelling COGWA to around 8,000 attendees and 170 elders by early 2011. Congregations split right down the middle. Families stopped speaking. Friendships evaporated. The “great work” of preaching the gospel? Yeah, that took a backseat while lawyers, dueling websites, and angry Feast-of-Tabernacles meltdowns took center stage. Real servant-hearted stuff, right? Families torn apart so a few ministers could keep calling the shots.

But here’s the punchline that turns this into pure comedy gold: COGWA is UCG with a fresh coat of paint, better branding, and the exact same attitude of selfishness—just rebranded as “service.” Same legalistic checklist—keep the Sabbath, Holy Days, tithes, clean meats, and the full Armstrong starter pack or you’re not really “in” and definitely not making it into the Kingdom. Same top-down structure where “assigned pastors” make sure the sheep stay in their assigned pens. Same endless chest-thumping about numbers, money, and “new doors” while pretending it’s all about humble service instead of empire-building. They just swapped the acronyms and the zip code.

Fifteen years later and they’re still patting themselves on the back in their annual letter: “One of the key elements for maintaining peace and productivity is the concept of service, which is the very opposite of selfishness.” Translation: “We’re not like those guys. We’re the good ones. Please keep sending in those tithes so we can keep growing our little 270-congregation empire and reminding everyone how selfless we are—unlike the UCG we fled because they tried to make governance slightly less heavy-handed.”

Spoiler alert: It’s selfishness with a smiley-face emoji. Same attitude, different headquarters. Another splinter from a splinter from a splinter, all claiming to be the one true continuation of Herbert W. Armstrong’s legacy while the rest of the scattered brethren watch the same tired soap opera on repeat—complete with the same governance fights, the same loyalty tests, and the same “we’re the virtuous ones” press releases.

So the next time COGWA pats itself on the back for its “spirit of service,” just remember: they didn’t leave UCG because they were holier. They left because they wanted to be the ones in charge—exactly like the UCG leaders they accused of the same sin. Fifteen years later, they’re still exactly the same—only now they get to write the press releases.

Service? 

The show never ends.

 

From our headquarters in McKinney, we serve 104 congregations in the U.S. and 166 outside the U.S. for a total of 270 congregations. Each has an assigned pastor. This past year we added new congregations in Uganda and Australia. Each year since our beginning we have seen increases in our finances—small but consistent growth. We have also seen the opening of new doors for preaching the gospel. So, what will this new fiscal year bring for the Church?

For 15 years, we have seen peace and productivity in the Church of God, a Worldwide Association, and we pray that this will continue. But we must never take it for granted. We must continue to work to promote this atmosphere in the Church throughout the world. One of the key elements for maintaining peace and productivity is the concept of service, which is the very opposite of selfishness. Whenever we focus on serving others instead of ourselves, good fruit is produced. 

Are you playing games with God?

Truly, nothing screams “New Covenant freedom in Christ” quite like a 2,000-word manifesto demanding that every Christian on Earth must kneel at the spiritual altar of Herbert W. Armstrong, join the one-and-only reincarnated Worldwide Church of God (or else), and treat a mid-20th-century radio preacher as the guy who personally restored “apostolic rule” while everyone else is just “playing games with God.” 
Jesus must be so relieved that you cleared this up for Him. After all, in Matthew 16:18 He only said He would build “His church”—not “churches,” you see. So obviously that means one single, visible, headquarters-based organization with a top-down government structure, tithe-collecting conferences, and a guy in Pasadena (or wherever the latest splinter landed) holding the divine copyright on truth. Because when the Son of God said “church,” He clearly meant “denominational franchise with membership cards and a loyalty oath to a dead apostle’s successor.” Anyone who thinks otherwise is calling Jesus a liar. Got it. Solid exegesis. 
And that Elijah prophecy in Matthew 17:11? Kitchen’s got it locked: Jesus was totally foreshadowing Herbert W. Armstrong restoring “the government of God” exactly as it existed in the first century (you know, the one where Peter was the rock and nobody ever disagreed or started new works). Never mind that Jesus Himself already told us John the Baptist fulfilled the Elijah role for the first coming (Matthew 11:14; 17:12-13). Details, details. Armstrong gets the sequel because… fruits? Ordination by the Oregon Conference? A handful of guys laying hands on him in the 1930s while the other Church of God factions were declared spiritually dead by divine fiat? 
Nothing says “law, not grace” like tying your eternal salvation to whether you stayed inside the right splinter after 1970s schisms. Ministers who left? Spiritually sealed for death. Members who remain? They alone get to ordain the Two Witnesses and hold the Philadelphia candlestick. Everyone else is either Laodicean lukewarm or headed for martyrdom-as-repentance. Because the New Covenant is totally about God running a cosmic game of musical chairs where the prize for leaving the “true church” is a ticket to be beheaded so you can maybe get grafted back in. 
Kitchen even gives us the eschatological bonus round: the Worldwide Church of God (his version) goes to a “place of safety” (Revelation 12:14-17, of course), the Two Witnesses tag-team in Jerusalem as the first witness’s hype men, Herbert himself gets resurrected as a “sport God being” (I assume that’s “spirit God being”—autocorrect is brutal), and the whole thing reboots Ambassador College in the World Tomorrow. It’s all one program, you see. One spiritual Temple. One unbroken chain of government. Jesus isn’t a liar, the Word cannot be broken… and apparently neither can the organizational chart. 

Here’s the actual New Covenant problem with all this: 
The New Covenant (Jeremiah 31:31-34; Hebrews 8:6-13) is explicitly not like the old one. No more central physical temple, no more Levitical priesthood, no more “one visible headquarters on Earth” model. The church is the body of Christ—every believer indwelt by the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 12:12-27; Ephesians 4:4-6). Authority flows from Christ the Head, not from an unbroken chain of ordinations that somehow survived from Peter through the Sardis-era Oregon Conference to HWA. The priesthood of all believers (1 Peter 2:9) means you don’t need a special class of “government of God” ministers to mediate between you and Jesus. 
The idea that salvation and truth are locked inside one human organization with a divine government structure is classic Old Covenant thinking dressed up in Revelation 2-3 proof-texts and historicist-era labels. It’s the same error the Pharisees ran with: “We have Abraham as our father” → “We have Herbert as our father and the Philadelphia candlestick.” It turns the gospel into geography, membership rolls, and loyalty to a man’s “fruits” instead of faith in Christ’s finished work. 
So no, Samuel, people aren’t “playing games with God” by refusing to join your reincarnated WCG and bow at the Armstrong altar. They’re simply living in the New Covenant reality where Jesus built His church out of living stones—scattered, imperfect, arguing, and still loved—without needing a single organizational franchise to keep the franchise alive. 
The real game-playing is pretending the New Covenant is just the Old Covenant with better branding and a radio program. Jesus isn’t a liar. But this theology sure treats the cross like it was optional.