There is a fascinating phenomenon that appears again and again in Armstrongism, thanks to its structure that is built around authoritarian personalities: eventually someone discovers that God's entire prophetic plan somehow points directly to them. This is how we have been blessed by such luminaries as Bob Thiel, Dave Pack, and Gerald Flurry.
Now, Samuel W. Kitchen has discovered, by the rigorous method of rearranging the letters in his own surname until they look vaguely biblical, that the post office should be forwarding the tithes of the faithful to him. He is, he assures us, of the house of Josiah-Hen, descendant of Zerubbabel and of Joseph of Arimathea, co-heir with Herbert W. Armstrong of the Siward Bjorn line, and therefore the authorized recipient of gold, silver, and the three tithes that will restore the temple and rebuke the devourer. The rest of us are building in Babylon. Please make the check payable to the man whose kitchen is named for Christ.
The pattern is almost predictable.
First, someone finds an obscure biblical passage. Then they connect it to a mysterious family lineage. Then they announce that their ancestry proves they possess a special role in God's plan. Finally, the conclusion arrives right on schedule:
You should recognize their authority and support their ministry financially.
It is a remarkable theological system. Thousands of years of biblical history, genealogies, prophecies, and symbolism all somehow end up pointing to one modern individual with a donation button.
Convenient, isn't it? This is the main reason for the existence of Armstrongism - the donation button.
Armstrongism has set the perfect example for Samuel. The claim he is promoting is that he can trace a family connection through Joseph of Arimathea, Zerubbabel, Herbert W. Armstrong, and ancient Israelite lines, thereby inheriting some kind of spiritual authority connected with Zechariah 6.
The problem is that Scripture does not establish such a mechanism.
Zechariah 6 is dealing with a specific historical situation involving the post-exilic period after the Babylonian captivity. Zerubbabel was a governor of Judah during the rebuilding of the temple, and Joshua the high priest was involved in the symbolic coronation described in the passage.
The passage does not say:
Thousands of years later, find someone with a similar-sounding surname, trace questionable genealogies, and then send him money because he occupies Zerubbabel's seat.
That interpretation requires a very creative imagination.
A little too creative.
It turns biblical prophecy into something resembling an ancient treasure map where the final clue mysteriously leads to someone's personal ministry account.
Armstrongism is based upon word associations, whether in British Israelism or proof of a leader's calling. Samuel does this exact same thing.
Start with the name. "Kitchen" is a Middle English occupational surname from cycene, the room where the food was cooked. It is not "Kit" plus "Chen." "Kit" is not Hebrew for "supporter of Christ." "Hen" and "Chen" are the same Hebrew root meaning grace or favor; they are not a secret family crest waiting for a twentieth-century American to notice that his last name ends in similar sounds. Josiah means "Yahweh supports" or "Yahweh heals," depending on the etymology one prefers; it does not mean "send money to anyone surnamed Kitchen." If surname puns conferred priesthood, every Baker would be entitled to the showbread and every Smith would be forging the covenant.
The biblical text he cites does not say what he needs it to say. Zechariah 6:9-15 records a symbolic act in the days of the return from Babylon. Gold and silver brought by Heldai, Tobijah, and Jedaiah are made into crowns and set on the head of Joshua the high priest. The prophet is told to go to the house of Josiah son of Zephaniah for the purpose of that ceremony. The crowns are then kept as a memorial in the temple. The speech that follows is about "the Branch," who will build the temple of the Lord, bear the glory, and sit as priest on his throne. That Branch is not Zerubbabel's distant cousin who will one day incorporate in the United States. Christian readers, from the New Testament onward, have identified the Branch with the Messiah. The house of Josiah is the location of a one-time prophetic sign-act, not a perpetual clearinghouse for tithes whose mailing address updates whenever a man named Kitchen feels led.
This argument follows a familiar pattern found throughout Armstrong-related splinter groups.
The original movement centered heavily on the idea that God was working through a specially appointed human leader. After Herbert W. Armstrong's death, numerous groups emerged, often claiming that they preserved the true work, the true message, or the true authority.
The common thread is always the same: Everyone else lost the truth. God has restored it here. And naturally, the person making that claim is usually the one standing in the restored position.
What are the odds? Apparently, in these movements, the odds are very good.
Every generation seems to produce someone who discovers that the prophetic baton conveniently landed in their own hands.
Zerubbabel himself was the Persian-appointed governor who led a return and began the second temple. His line is traced in the genealogies of Matthew and Luke because those genealogies are interested in the ancestry of Jesus, not in establishing a continuing civil or ecclesiastical office that survives the fall of the temple, the end of the Levitical system, and the arrival of the new covenant. Hebrews is inconveniently clear that the earthly sanctuary and its regulations were copies and shadows, that Christ is the high priest of a better covenant, and that the old order is obsolete. There is no vacant "seat of Zerubbabel" for a modern claimant to occupy. The governor's work was finished when the temple was built and, later, when that temple was superseded.
The Joseph of Arimathea myth is legend stacked on legend. The Gospels say he was a rich member of the council, a disciple, who obtained the body of Jesus and laid it in his own tomb. Medieval British tradition, much of it late and pious, turned him into the uncle of Mary, the bearer of the Grail, the founder of Glastonbury, and the ancestor of British royalty. British-Israel and Armstrongite writers adopted the tale because it helped them connect the throne of David to the British Isles. None of this is history that can be audited. No continuous, documented pedigree runs from a first-century Judean counselor through Dark Age Britain, Siward Bjorn, the Armstrongs, and a Kitchen family in such a way that a living man can produce the records and say, "Here is the chain; here is the office." Even if every link were real, blood would not confer the right to collect Christian offerings. The New Testament never once treats descent from David, from Zerubbabel, or from any Sanhedrin member as a qualification for ministry or for the receipt of money. Paul, who could boast of his Hebrew pedigree when it suited an argument, refused to do so as a ground of authority.
Armstrong's own movement already illustrates the problem. Herbert W. Armstrong claimed unique insight, the Philadelphia mantle, and the right to the tithe that would finish the work before the place of safety. After his death, the church split, resplit, and resplit again. Each fragment has tended to discover that the true continuation runs through its own leader, its own literature, and its own bank account. Kitchen's version simply adds a family-tree flourish and insists that reorganization is apostasy while his own private claim is restoration. The pattern is familiar: one man, one work, one place the money must go, and a warning that refusal means missing the kingdom.
The most concerning aspect of these claims is not merely unusual interpretations of prophecy. It is what often follows: A demand for recognition, loyalty, and financial support.
The argument becomes: "God has appointed me." Therefore: "You must support what God is doing through me."
But this creates a serious biblical question: Where did Jesus tell His followers to locate a modern individual claiming inherited prophetic authority and send money to him?
Where did Jesus instruct Christians to verify someone's spiritual legitimacy through genealogy?
Where did the apostles tell believers: Search carefully through ancient family records until you find the person occupying Zerubbabel's seat?
They did not.
Instead, the New Testament repeatedly emphasizes faithfulness to Christ, humility, service, and spiritual fruit.
Jesus warned about religious leaders who sought honor and special status. He taught that greatness in God's kingdom is demonstrated through serving others, not through claiming elevated rank.
Another recurring Armstrong teaching is the idea that a specific organization represents the continuation of the Philadelphia era of Revelation.
This creates another theological dilemma: If every splinter group claims to be the continuation of the true Philadelphia work, how many Philadelphia works are there?
Apparently, the Philadelphia candlestick has multiplied like loaves and fishes.
Each group says:
"We are the faithful remnant."
Each claims:
"Others have fallen away."
Each suggests:
"Support us because this is where God is working."
At some point, a reasonable Christian has to ask:
Is this actually biblical restoration - or simply an endless cycle of people claiming spiritual inheritance from previous claimants?
New-covenant Christians have specific reasons to decline the invitation. The tithe of the Mosaic law was tied to the land, the Levites, the temple, and the festivals of Israel. The New Testament nowhere reimposes that statute on Gentile churches or on Jewish believers in Christ. What it does teach is voluntary, cheerful giving for the support of those who labor in the gospel, for the poor, and for the needs of the saints. That giving is not a test of whether one has found the correct descendant of Josiah-Hen. It is not the mechanism by which the devourer is rebuked, and the European clay is broken. Malachi 3 addresses a covenant people who were robbing God under the Levitical system; it is not a collection letter for every later claimant who can quote it. Revelation 12 describes the woman's flight and the dragon's rage; it does not name a treasurer.
Authority in the church, on the apostolic witness, rests on the gospel itself, on faithfulness to the apostles' teaching, and on the recognition of the congregation, not on a surname, a medieval pedigree, a self-appointed upstart, someone who had some dreams and nightmares, or a private assurance that Christ has added one to an office the text never created. A man may be sincere, industrious, and convinced. Sincerity does not turn Zechariah's memorial crowns into a standing order for his household. The Branch has already come. The temple he builds is not financed by locating the right Kitchen.
The Christian message has never been:
"Find the man with the right genealogy."
It has always been:
"Follow Christ."
And thankfully, following Christ does not require locating a modern Zerubbabel, decoding someone's surname, or sending money to someone who claims heaven's endorsement.
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Quoted below, as Samuel wrote it:
With Zerubbabel, they carried out the tithes and offerings, the gold and silver, and brought it to the House of God.
In Zechariah 6:10-15, we read:
Take of them of the captivity, even of Heldai, of Tobijah, and of Jedaiah, which are come from Babylon, and come thou the same day, and go into the house of Josiah the son of Zephaniah;
Then take silver and gold, and make crowns, and set them upon the head of Joshua the son of Josedech, the high priest;
And speak unto him, saying, Thus speaketh the Lord of hosts, saying, Behold the man whose name is The Branch; and he shall grow up out of his place, and he shall build the temple of the Lord:
Even he shall build the temple of the Lord; and he shall bear the glory, and shall sit and rule upon his throne; and he shall be a priest upon his throne: and the counsel of peace shall be between them both.
And the crowns shall be to Helem, and to Tobijah, and to Jedaiah, and to Hen the son of Zephaniah, for a memorial in the temple of the Lord.
And they that are far off shall come and build in the temple of the Lord, and ye shall know that the Lord of hosts hath sent me unto you. And this shall come to pass, if ye will diligently obey the voice of the Lord your God.
The HOUSE that receives the tithes and offerings, is called "Josiah-Hen". That is WHO IS AUTHORIZED. That is where Zerubbabel is!
In fact, this is my family line. I can trace my lineage back to Joseph of Arimathew, back to Zerubbabel.
My family is Kit-chen. Josiah means "supporter of Yah" Kit means "Supporter of Christ"
Hen and Chen is the same Hebrew word.
Herbert W Armstrong is a descendant of this same family line!! His line was surnamed ARMSTRONG through Siward Bjourn! I am a direct descendant of Siward Bjourn too! And We are the House of HEN.
Zerubbabel was of that same house. Because in Zechariah 6, God says to give gold and silver to the house of Josiah-Hen the son of Zephaniah! By the three tithes, the Temple shall be restored! Notice it is three men that are taken to go to this specific house!
How will the coming United States of Europe break up? Through the obedience of the CLAY or ISRAELITE NATIONS among them! Who will God use to do that? The same individual who shall do the same with these camps of Korah, Dathan, and Abiram! Jesus Christ will do it through ONE MAN.
Because notice in Malachi 3 the DEVOURER is REBUKED. Satan will be rebuked! Now notice Revelation 12:13-17! How is Satan and his armies REBUKED!
Now notice Zechariah 3, and Satan is rebuked. IT TIES DIRECTLY TO ZECHARIAH 6 and the house mentioned!
This is about the Philadelphia elect GOING TO A PLACE OF SAFETY!
Those who obey God in bringing Tithes and Offerings to those restoring the Philadlephia Candlestick, the Worldwide Church of God! Not another church. Not re-organized as a new thing as these groups have.
BUT SPIRITUALLY ORGANIZED AS CHRIST ORGANIZED THROUGH HERBERT W ARMSTRONG! This is NOT MY CHURCH!
But I have been added to it by the Hand of Jesus Christ! I have received authority from Christ, and even the Bible backs me up by pointing out my family line and the family line of Herbert W Armstrong!
Us being of that line gives us no promise of position in the Church. But because AUTHORITY HAS BEEN GIVEN, we ought to OBEY GOD, and get back of HIS WORK. And stop this support of Babylon. Because the House of God will be built! and all these other houses will fall.
This is about getting the Bride ready! It is a TEST ON US! God is watching us to see who is serving HIM, and who is just building in Babylon.
I hope you realize your calling brethren! We will not enter the kingdom of God, any other way!
In Jesus Christ's name,
Samuel W Kitchen
