Banned Cultural Appreciation Time: The Saga of Bob Thiel

 

BANNED CULTURAL APPRECIATION TIME! 

A POEM READING BY TONTO! 

In Arroyo Grande, a prophet appears,

Bobby Thiel, with dubious cheers.

A phony sage, in religious guise,

With potions and herbs, he peddles his lies.

A hundred followers, all Caucasian and meek,

In his mystical garden, where delusions peak.

He claims divine visions, a charlatan's play,

In the land of sunshine, where shadows betray.

Oh, Bobby Thiel, the preacher so sly,

Selling Christian voodoo, oh my, oh my!

His potions and herbs, a dubious blend,

To cure your ills, or so they pretend.

In the heart of California, he weaves his spell,

A prophet with a story, too absurd to tell.

His white-clad flock, like sheep in the pen,

Following blindly, again and again.

"Buy my elixirs," he declares with zeal,

Promising miracles, a snake oil ordeal.

With a wink and a grin, he counts his gold,

As the gullible masses, in ignorance, hold.

Bobby Thiel, the master of disguise,

In Arroyo Grande, where skepticism dies.

A satire of faith, a parody profound,

In the circus of belief, he wears the crown.

So here's to Bobby, the prophet bizarre,

With his potions and voodoo, a spectacle so far.

A hundred followers, lost in the haze,

In the land of sunshine, where reason decays.

The Doubleminded Jon Brisby

From a Church of God the Eternal source

The Doubleminded Jon Brisby

While most in the Church of God Eternal don't listen to the sermons, because they are sleeping, daydreaming, or in a hypnotic trance. A keen ear will pick up the doublespeak employed by Jon Brisby to keep his mentally retarded flock in a state of confusion.

In his deceitfully titled sermon "The Vow of Baptism" (nowhere does the bible speak of baptism being a vow, rather instead a ritual cleaning), Jon makes the bold assertion; "Sunday keeping" Baptist (or any other non-Armstrongite) baptisms are not valid... even if one is sincere, because they don't know what they're getting into. (1:09:00 mark)

Then he proceeds to tell his boneheaded congregation; God promises to give them (Armstrongites) the holy spirit when they get baptised when they're sincere even if they don't know what they're getting into. (1:16:00 mark)

Wait, what?

A clear example of doublespeak, one could never pin Brisby down on a statement, because he carefully crafts a contradiction for his outrageous assertions and will gaslight anyone into not understanding his unclear position on his statements.

This is why no one in his church understands the "official" opinion in regard to doctrine, prophecy, and biblical interpretation.

Maybe Jon Brisby wasn't informed of the fact that his idol Herbert Armstrong was baptised by a "Sunday keeping" Baptist ( The Enigma of Herbert W Armstrong ). Yes, the validity of Herbert's, and all Armstrongite, baptisms depends on the valid authority to baptize by the Hinson Memorial Baptist Church in Portland Oregon.

Uh oh, this is a problem for Armstrongists, if "Sunday keeping" Baptist baptisms aren't valid = then Herbert's baptism wasn't valid = and no Armstrongite who received baptism from the WCG or splinters has a valid baptism = and no one in Armstrongism received the holy spirit. Oops.

On the other hand if "Sunday keeping" Baptist baptisms ARE valid, then that means Armstrongites don't have the monopoly to baptize like they tell everyone they do, and the body of Christ is a much bigger group than the handful of people sitting around listening to prerecorded sermons on Saturdays.

If they are wrong about this one doctrine, what else are they wrong about?

If you haven't already, it's time to evaluate the teachings of these blind leaders of the blind.

CGI’s Bill Watson: How to be Spiritual by doing PHYSICAL things!

 

CGI’s Bill Watson: How to be Spiritual by doing PHYSICAL things!

Lonnie Hendrix

CGI Pastor Bill Watson’s first Sabbath sermon of 2024 was aimed at inspiring his congregation to save up their money to observe the Feast of Tabernacles at one of CGI’s designated sites. Bill pointed out that Christ’s disciples should be seeking God’s Kingdom and his righteousness as their first priority (Matthew 6:33). Next, he proceeded to remind his audience that Jesus had admonished his followers to love the Lord your God will all of your heart, soul, and mind (Matthew 22:37). 

“How do we do this? What does this even mean? How is it that we’re showing God that we really do indeed love him? Where/how do we spend our time?” the pastor asked. His answer, of course, is exactly what one would expect from a minister of one of the ACOGs. Mr. Watson said: “The amount of time/investment you put into something illustrates how much you love it – how important it is to you.” For him that means how much time we are devoting to things like Bible study, prayer, and meditation. He went on to note that “The law is still in action in many respects.”

Yes, according to Mr. Watson, we should be keeping God’s commandments (I John 5:1-3, I John 2:5-6, II John 6). For him, that means Sabbath observance, festival observance, clean and unclean meats, etc. Mr. Watson believes that these commandments should define a Christian’s behavior – that they represent the best way to demonstrate that we love God.

Unfortunately, like most Armstrongites, Mr. Watson does not understand that Christ revealed a new iteration of God’s Law – those two great commandments which he referenced in his remarks. In the Gospel of John, we read that Christ said: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”  (John 13:34-35, ESV) Moreover, in that same first epistle of John which Mr. Watson referenced, we read: “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us… We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.” (I John 4:7-12 and 19-21, ESV) In other words, the best way to demonstrate our love for God is to actually love each other!

Mr. Watson, however, was persistent. “Is there something else that we could be doing?” he asked. For him, the very best way to demonstrate to God where our hearts and minds are at is to follow his “demands” in Leviticus 23. For Mr. Watson, these represent God’s expectations of his people. According to him, how diligently we handle physical things demonstrates how diligent we are with spiritual things.

Pastor Watson believes this stuff may not be important to us, but that it is clearly “important to God.” He went on to claim that some of his brethren within CGI “have marginalized the importance of these festivals.” In particular, Mr. Watson zeroed in on the lack of enthusiasm which some CGI folks have demonstrated for observing the Feast of Tabernacles. He noted that some Sunday-keeping Christians are more zealous in their observance of Christmas than some CGI folks are in observing the FOT. He even quoted the passage about taking tree branches and constructing temporary dwellings, and then proceeded to explain that CGI has “adjusted” those requirements (they stay in hotels). He noted that “we handle it the way we do.”

Mr. Watson believes that “words are cheap – actions are precious,” and that “we’re defined by what we do, not what we say.” I couldn’t agree with him more. In that first epistle of John that the pastor referenced, we read: “By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.” (I John 3:16-18, ESV) Moreover, in his epistle, James noted: “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.” (James 1:27)

Mr. Watson believes that God wants him and his brothers and sisters within CGI to observe the Feast of Tabernacles. In my humble opinion, I believe God expects a whole lot more from Christ’s disciples. What do you think?

 

Crackpot Prophet Suffers Major Butthurt Today...HOW DARE I CRITICIZE HIM! HE IS NEVER WRONG!

What a glorious day to be alive in sunny California. Cloudless skies, warm temperatures, beautiful green hills towering over Pasadena, wild parrots joyfully screeching as they fly about, children playing in the park, and an elderly couple cuddling on a bench. This beautiful scene was disrupted by the screeching and whining from Grover Beach /Arroyo Grande CA where God's most IMPORTANT prophet to ever exist in the history of humanity got a major wedgie over the post here yesterday about his epic failure as a prophet.

The Great Bwana to Africa and 100 Caucasians had this as his headline:

Has Bob Thiel been prophetically wrong for the past 12 years as reported by Gary Leonard of ‘Banned by HWA’?

Someone needs a diaper change and it's not me! This is too funny!

God's Greatest prophet writes:

Although Gray Leonard, the webmaster at the Banned by HWA , has never me nor even spoken with me, he regularly posts insults, sarcasm, and improper information about me as he hates leaders related to the Church of God. On rare occasion, I will bother to refute some of his posts. This will be one of those times, basically to set the record straight for people interested in the truth.

Oh, Bobby, I can see why so many in Africa make fun of you. I don't hate any Church of God leader and never have.  I don't even hate you, though I do feel sorry for you that you have never received therapy for your delusions of grandeur. What I do hate is the lying self-appointed Church of God false prophets and self-appointed leaders who distort the gospel and lie to their followers with damnable heresies and half-truths. God no more appointed you than Gerald Flurry has the new coronation stone. Mental illness is rampant in many of today's Church of God leaders and most COG folk recognize that in you and the other nutjobs like Dave Pack, Gerald Flurry, and Ron Weinland.

The Great Bwana Bob Mzungu then goes on to copy and paste the entire blog post from yesterday, paying particular notice to the list of years I posted where he was wrong.

Gary Leonard saying that I was wrong about each of those years is not the truth.
Jesus said:

11 Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. 12 Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you. (Matthew 5:11-12) 

 

So yes, Gary Leonard, Jesus said I am blessed when you post all kinds of insults, evil, and false things about me.

Oh, honey, I hate to say this, but Jesus is NOT talking about you in that scripture. This is what Scripture says about you:

Matthew 24:3-8 

3 As he sat on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to him privately,saying, “Tell us, when will these things be, and what will be the sign of your coming and of the end of the age?” 4 And Jesus answered them, “See that noone leads you astray. 5 For many will come in my name, saying, ‘I am the Christ,’ and they will lead many astray. 6 And you will hear of wars and rumors ofwars. See that you are not alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is notyet. 7 For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom, andthere will be famines and earthquakes in various places. 8 All these are but thebeginning of the birth pains. 

 

Matthew 7:15 

15 “Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. 

This is what Jesus says about you:

Matthew 23: 1-29
1 Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples:

2 “The teachers of the law and the Pharisees sit in Moses’ seat.

3 So you must be careful to do everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach.

4 They tie up heavy, cumbersome loads and put them on other people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to move them.

5 “Everything they do is done for people to see: They make their phylacterieswide and the tassels on their garments long;

6 they love the place of honor at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues;

7 they love to be greeted with respect in the marketplaces and to be called ‘Rabbi’ by others.

8 “But you are not to be called ‘Rabbi,’ for you have one Teacher, and you are all brothers.

9 And do not call anyone on earth ‘father,’ for you have one Father, and he is in heaven.

10 Nor are you to be called instructors, for you have one Instructor, the Messiah.

11 The greatest among you will be your servant.

12 For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.

13 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You shut the door of the kingdom of heaven in people’s faces. You yourselves do not enter, nor will you let those enter who are trying to.

15 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You travel over land and sea to win a single convert, and when you have succeeded, you make them twice as much a child of hell as you are.

16 “Woe to you, blind guides! You say, ‘If anyone swears by the temple, it means nothing; but anyone who swears by the gold of the temple is bound by that oath.’

17 You blind fools! Which is greater: the gold, or the temple that makes the gold sacred?

18 You also say, ‘If anyone swears by the altar, it means nothing; but anyone who swears by the gift on the altar is bound by that oath.’

19 You blind men! Which is greater: the gift, or the altar that makes the gift sacred?

20 Therefore, anyone who swears by the altar swears by it and by everything on it.

21 And anyone who swears by the temple swears by it and by the one who dwells in it.

22 And anyone who swears by heaven swears by God’s throne and by the one who sits on it.

23 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cumin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former.

24 You blind guides! You strain out a gnat but swallow a camel.

25 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence.

26 Blind Pharisee! First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean.

27 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean.

28 In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.

29 “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You build tombs for the prophets and decorate the graves of the righteous.

The Great Bwana took major exception to Tonto's comment:

On January 28, 2020,someone who calls himself “Tonto” posted posted the following related to me and the coronavirus at the anti-COG site Banned by HWA :

Tonto said…If Thiel was such a great prophet, then why didn’t he specifically and directly warn the world about this coronavirus several weeks ago?

Then the Great Bwana goes on to post lots of "proofs" of how accurate he is till he gets to this:

Many of those at the Banned by HWA website despise prophecies and do not believe the prophets–do not be like them!

I don't think anyone here despises prophecies and real prophets, but in Armstrongism our track record of having real prophets so far has been a big fat 

Herbert Armstrong was not one. Garner Ted Armstrong was not one. Herman Hoeh was not one. Rod Meredith was not one. Gerald Waterhouse was not one. Dibar Aprtican was not one. John Rittenbaugh was not one. Gerald Flurry is not one. Ron Weinland is not one. Dave Pack is not one. The list is endless when it comes to COG men. But, more importantly, YOU are not one, which is a simple FACT!

Then the Great Bwana Bob Mzungu gets butt hurt over another comment by one of you agents of Satan who comment here:

That said, another commenter at the Banned by HWA website, posted the following related to Gary Leonard’s post related to the 24 items to prophetically watch in 2024:

10. Knowledge Increasing

Not in CCOG!

Saturday, January 6, 2024 at 6:03:00 PM PST

That is also a lie.

The Great Bwana Bob Mzungu ends with these pithy words of wisdom:

Now getting back to Banned by HWA, one of the other Satanic tactics it has repeatedly done at its website is to use the “guilt by association” game. This is an old Satanic tactic that was done on more than one occasion against Jesus by some of those who rejected Him (e.g. Luke 5:30, 15:2). The Bible teaches that Satan is the accuser of the brethren (Revelation 12:9-10), and we have seen his allies do the same. 

 

The Bible teaches:

16 The lazy man is wiser in his own eyes

Than seven men who can answer sensibly. (Proverbs 26:15)

Do not simply accept nonsense and other anti-CCOG statements posted at places like the Banned by HWA webmaster.

How is it "guilt by association" when you are compared to all of the other liars in Armstrongism? God never appointed you. That is a simple fact. Just because you claim to be the "fastest growing Church of God" does not make it true. Paul speaks a lot about false prophets and false teachers entering the church boasting and performing signs and wonders:

2 Thessalonians 2:9 — American Standard Version (ASV)
9 even he, whose coming is according to the working of Satan with all power and signs and lying wonders,

Any COG leader who spends 90% of the time boasting about how great he is and how great his little group is is NOT an agent of the Gospel. In fact, you blaspheme the real Gospel and the one it describes when you whore yourself out to the law and the Old Covenant. It doesn't matter how many Biblical mantles you take on claiming you are just like the prophets of old. You are not. Never have been, and never will be.

Jer. 5:30, 31 A wonderful and horrible thing is committed in the land: The prophets prophesy falsely, and the priests bear rule by their means. 

Jer. 14:14) Then the Lord said unto me, The prophets prophesy lies in My name: I sent them not, neither have I commanded them, neither spake I unto them; they prophesy unto you a false vision and divination, and a thing of nought and the deceit of their heart. 

Jer. 23:14,16 I have seen also in the prophets of Jerusalem an horrible thing: they commit adultery, and walk in lies; they strengthen also the hands of evildoers, that none doth return from his wickedness; they are all of them unto Me as Sodom. . . . Thus saith the Lord of hosts, Hearken not unto the words of the prophets that prophesy unto you, they make you vain: they speak a vision of their own heart, and not out of the mouth of the Lord.

Ezek. 22:25 There is a conspiracy of her prophets in the midst thereof, like a roaring lion ravening the prey; they have devoured souls, they have taken the treasure and precious things, they have made her many widows.  

 

Philadelphia Church of God's New Obsession With Porn And The OnlyFans Website

When it comes to Armstrongism, if you see it obsessing on a certain topic it is almost a sure bet that its leadership or members are having issues with that subject. That is how the ball has bounced in Armstrongism for decades. The louder they shout, the more they are involved in it.

Abraham Blondeau has an article up on The Trumpet site about the OnlyFans porn site, Our OnlyFans Culture

Blondeau writes:

K

ylie’s $13 hourly wage wasn’t making ends meet. Looking for extra money, she eventually signed up for a role in a pornographic film, earning $1,000 in a day. But her family, friends, employer and small-town acquaintances found out about it. With her reputation ruined, how did Kylie move forward with her life?

She moved away and became a pornographic model full time. Now she operates an OnlyFans account and makes $19,000 per month selling pictures and videos of herself. “I’m proud that I changed my life,” she told the Toronto Sun. “Everyone my age has thought of doing OnlyFans; I was just brave enough.” She still avoids going back to her hometown, saying, “While they are close-minded, judging and miserable, I’m getting rich and having fun.”

Sadly, a woman selling sex for money is nothing new. Thanks to the digital age, though, these activities are no longer limited to dark alleyways. Prostitution and pornography are available to every home and device with Internet. Digital prostitution is one of the most profitable businesses in the world. The OnlyFans website is at the leading edge of on-demand digital prostitution.

This exposes one of the greatest scourges of the modern age: the widespread supply and demand for illicit sex. Our Judeo-Christian culture is being replaced by an OnlyFans culture. During this titanic cultural shift, there is one question no one wants to ask: What does the God of the Bible think about it?

I can almost guarantee that those Herbert Armstrong College students who secretly have smartphones have now been titillated into checking out the OnlyFans site.

Blondeau continues:

OnlyFans is an online subscription-based service started in 2016. Users gain access to content by buying a subscription or paying tips. The creators get 80 percent of the money, and 20 percent goes to OnlyFans. Primarily used by pornographers and models, it exploded in popularity during the pandemic. Currently it has 3 million creators and over 220 million subscribers. Seventy percent of the content is pornographic in nature, including nearly all of the top earners. Since 2016, OnlyFans has paid creators over $10 billion.

Its ubiquity is shocking. It was the 25th-most visited website in 2023. The site gets 3.8 billion visits per year, which amount to 320 million monthly visits. Most of this traffic is funneled from social media sites like X, Facebook, Reddit, TikTok and Youtube. Many “creators” preview their content on social media to try to lure users to pay for the full version.

Every day, 500,000 new users sign up. The average age is between 35 and 44. “OnlyFans followers are predominantly male, owning 69 percent of the platform’s user base,” wrote TechJury. “The women occupy the remaining 31 percent. These men are usually white, married and identify as heterosexuals, bisexual or pansexuals. In stark contrast, the opposite is true for the creators: 70 percent of content creators identify as females. This is due to their greater success rate, earning an average of 78 percent more than their male counterparts.”

This has to really infuriate the PCG and Gerald Flurry to see all this money flowing into a website that they cannot get their hands on. It makes more in one day moneywise than Flurry rakes in in a year. Imagine how many more planes they could buy with that money or more money they could put into idiotic Irish dance stage shows about Old Testament prophets or useless topics like coronation chairs. The lost opportunities are endless!

So what is the solution to this fascination with OnlyFans? These people need to read Herbert's crazy book on sex! Herb had no idea his Missing Dimension in Sex book could solve such problems in 2024 if people would only read it! If they don't, that ‘Unseen Strong Hand From Someplace’ will spank their bottoms!

“Since it is a basic truism that a solid family structure is the foundational bulwark of any stable and permanent society, this fact means only one thing—civilization as we know it is on the way down—and out—unless that great ‘Unseen Strong Hand From Someplace’ soon intervenes and saves today’s sick society.” The late Herbert W. Armstrong wrote those words in The Missing Dimension in Sex in 1981, a textbook that explains God’s laws on sex, marriage and family.

At the same time as Blondeau's article came out, those fun boys at the cult compound reposted one of Gerald Flurry's articles from 2019, A Bigger Pastime Than Sports where he flogs indignantly about the easy access to porn on computers and cell phones. I have to say, those guys in Oklahoma sure must be busy checking out those sites if having the Grand Poobah weigh in on the topic so much. But, this is Armstrongism after all and SEX is as important as Satan is. Both get discussed more than Jesus ever has been.

Flurry writes:

Every second, over 28,000 Internet users are looking at pornography. The Worldwide Web is swimming in it. 

 

Thirty-five years ago, the porn industry in the United States brought in $75 million in revenue. That in itself is shameful. But thanks to the Internet, it has since exploded! It is impossible to get a completely accurate estimate, but the numbers range from $10 billion to $97 billion! As much as we love our sports, we don’t love them as much as we love pornography! Major League Baseball makes only $10.3 billion. The National Football League generates $8.2 billion in income. The National Basketball Association generates $7.4 billion. Pornography is probably at least double the nba—perhaps many times greater—and without any of the prime-time advertising, big-time merchandising or the massive arenas.

It must frost Flurry's butt to see all that money flowing into porn when he deserves it all.

A little down the article he says this:

America spews this filth out into the world. The United States is part of the descendants of Israel. Who are some of the other descendants? Britain, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, the Jewish nation—all leaders in sins like pornography! Our nations are the only ones that have a history with God. They are supposed to set an example of God’s way of life. Instead, they are doing the opposite.

The spiritual filth that Flurry spews into the world is far more damaging than the porn will ever be. The spiritual health of seeking Christians and of his members has been destroyed by lies and false doctrines. Broken families, marriages, suicides, sexual assaults, and more hide under the dirty clothing of the Philadelphia Church of God.

Do you realize what is really inspiring all this family-destroying smut? The Bible tells us: It is Satan the devil. He is very active, and he is glutting us with these horrible influences. We have turned to the devil’s way, and we are about to see where that leads us. We are being entrapped in sins that wreck our families and fill them with hatred and lies and cheating—the opposite of the character of God. The Bible prophesies that Satan’s violent anger will culminate in the horrific Great Tribulation

The PCG long ago went over to the dark side with its aberrant doctrines and teachings. The satan they decry has had full reign in the PCG for decades. Until they clean their own abhorrent house of filth they have no right to be lecturing the world on the things they think is wrong.

 

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Crackpot Prophet Lists 24 Generic Things To "Prophetically Watch For In 2024"

 

Here we are in 2024 and another year has gone by and our resident false prophets continue to be made out as the liars they are. One would think that these self-appointed prophets, who claimed a direct channel to some creature they call god, would be better at t what they think they can do. But, no. They just flounder around and make idiotic utterances that no one cares about anymore.

This brings us today to our very own resident prophet of God dreamed into being as the foundations of the world were being created. Assigned to be revealed on earth in the perilous end times as God's most important human to ever walk the earth, after Jesus of course, but above all others, this great prophet would arise from the ashes of Armstrongism to bring truth and light to a hurting world. This prophet would be the last chance anyone in humanity would have to be saved before Satan is unleashed to wreak havoc worldwide. Only true followers of this mighty prophet would be able to discern the time they need to flee to Petra, Sella, or some other godforsaken place in the Middle East where all devoted followers would be subjected to 3 1/2 years of hearing him preach.

Never in the history of the Church of God movement has a man as great and important as Bob Thiel the Great Bwana to Africa and 100 Caucasians been more prophetically endowed than we see in him today. A world-renowned scholar on everything imaginable, from the Mayans to end-time prophecy, the Great Bwana is the most quoted man spiritually converted man ever to appear on MSNBC and in the Washington Post. These news organizations stood in awe as the wisdom of the Great Bwana astounded them all as he spoke. Never had they heard such mind-altering information!

As the new year starts all kinds of people are making their yearly predictions on what they expect to happen in 2024. For prophecy addicts this is a very important time to get their messages out even though their track records have all been epic failures the previous year. Yet, they march on to victory! Onward Christian Soldiers!!!

Anyway, back to our favorite resident prophet of Armstrongism, the Great Bwana to Africa and 100 Caucasians has released his list of prophetic things to watch for in 2024. Anyone with half a brain can see these are nothing more than current news stories or just daily events that happen all the time. It is so easy for COG false prophets to search for articles and news stories to prop up their utterances.

The Great Bwana Mzungu writes:

Sermon: 24 Items to Prophetically Watch in 2024 

Dr. Thiel goes over 24 items to watch in 2024 and points out events that were related to several of them in 2023: 

1. Scoffing in the Last Days 

2. Immorality Prophecies Being Fulfilled 

3. Media, Internet, and Other Censorship 

4. Weather Sorrows and Troubles 

5. Earthquakes and Volcanoes 

6. The White Horse of the Apocalypse 

7. Strife and the Red Horse of War 

8. Trade Issues 

9. The Deal of Daniel 9:27 

10. Knowledge Increasing 

11. Debt 

12. US Dollar Dominance will Decrease 

13. CBDC and 666 

14. Gold 

15. Unrest, Terror, and the Dividing of the USA 

16. Europe Will Work to Reorganize 

17. Europe Will Have a Great Army and Many Ships 

18. Steps Towards the Formation of the King of the South 

19. The Time of the Gentiles will Lead to Armageddon 

20. Jews Readying to Sacrifice 

21. Inventions of Evil Things 

22. Totalitarian Steps 

23. Preparation for the Short Work 

24. Fulfillment of Matthew 24:14 and 28:19-20. 

Dr. Thiel goes over prophetic scriptures (in 2 Timothy, Habakkuk, Amos, Daniel, Matthew, Mark, Romans, Revelation, Isaiah, 2 Corinthians, Psalms), including those that must be fulfilled before the start of the Great Tribulation, as well as others that also need to be fulfilled before Jesus returns. When are some prophetic events expected and not expected to be fulfilled? Could we see events in 2024 in the Middle East involving Israel that would lead to the Great Tribulation starting in 3 1/2 years and Jesus returning in 2031? Dr. Thiel goes over many biblical items and ties them in with world events that happened and are in the process of happening.

Here is the list of years where the Great Bwana Bob was wrong:

2012

2013

2014

2015

2016

2017

2018

2019

2020

2021

2022

2023 

 

PCG's Ryan Malone: Dopamine hits that come from sending and receiving texts can stir up thoughts and emotions that are problematic

When it comes to the Philadelphia Church of God and its members it is all about control. Every minuscule thing members might do is under scrutiny by the spiritual deviates in control of the church. It is particularly worrisome for younger church members. Many are refusing to let the church dictate what they can and can't do and are leaving the church, others are like pigs at a slop trough and will gorge themselves on any and everything the leaders say as if it is directly from some god.

Ryan Malone, who has his own questionable issues, seems to think he is an authority on dating. God forbid though if you use your phone to text someone, particularly if you use a smartphone. PCG is against smartphones because they allow members easy access to articles and dissent sites condemning the abuses in the PCG. However, this ban is only for members and not the HQ leaders who all have their smartphones.

Exit and Support Network has a letter from one of their readers telling about Malone's recent article on dating expectations:

“What Counts as a Date?” and listed things such as texting or chatting and how there are things you “really shouldn’t share at all.” To give all this more validity he brought that Prophet (GF) into the picture and said: “Pastor General Gerald Flurry would like it stressed that texting is not a good way to date and can be a dangerous way to form a relationship.”

“The dopamine hits that come from sending and receiving texts can stir up thoughts and emotions that are problematic when trying to build wholesome and solidly founded friendships … [it] tends to draw you away from interacting with and building actual relationships in the real world around you.” 

 

He instructed how (in the case there were not a lot of “available singles”) it would be wise not to text with anymore frequency than you might encounter someone on the Armstrong College Campus as a student. It shouldn’t be anything “lengthy or deep” and having a longer conversation over a meal at Sabbath services is “simply simply impossible to replicate through texting.” He said “e-mails and chatting—shouldn’t be used for dating.” His admonition was that they shouldn’t fool themselves into thinking this is not a date, because before they realize it, they have “BUILT SOMETHING. And they’ve built it on a shaky foundation, through a decidedly superficial form of communication.”

Some of this “advice” seems to be in contrast to a 2013 article1 found on PCG’s church site that states: “Use online dating as a tool to get to know someone in a unique way, and you will overcome many social barriers in your life.” And this was written by a single in PCG who was “dating” a lady through e-mail (later Skype) who said their relationship had “been built almost entirely online, across an ocean!” Of course, it was brought out that their “dating” was all under the direction of their local ministers.

Why does so much of Armstrongism devolve into sex? If only they talked about Jesus as much as they do sex-related topics they might be happier people. 

One thing is for sure when it comes to Armstrongism, it is a "dope-mine" of some of the biggest controlling idiots the world has ever seen.