Global /Eternal Church of God: It Is Offensive To God If You Get Up To Get A Drink of Water, Tell Jokes or Nap During Services

No naps in the Global/Church of the Eternal God while the preacher is preaching!

Apparently Global/CEG COG folk cannot joke about their preachers making fools of themselves in the pulpit.  So the next time some long winded fool won't shut up or says something really, really stupid, just sit there with a straight face and act as if nothing happened.  God forbids you from laughing at the preacher.

Notice also that it is a major slight against God if you get up to get a drink of water while listening to services at home!

We concentrate on and listen carefully to the messages (including the announcements, as well as the sermonette and sermon). It is understood, of course, that parents will have to take care of their babies and young children, which might even require at times to take them out of the Church hall, when they get too loud and disturb others. But apart from these sometimes inevitable distractions, there is no excuse for not paying close and undivided attention to services. It would be highly inappropriate to engage in jokes or unnecessary conversation during services (except for unavoidable situations, such as when our technical staff may at times have to communicate with each other to make sure that the services are being properly broadcast, etc.). It would also be offensive to God if someone were to get up during services (whether in a Church hall or at home) to walk to the kitchen for a snack or a meal, or even a cup of coffee or tea or water (excepting necessary circumstances), or to take a nap during services.

This is the law as laid down by Norbert Link