“The RCG Simpleton”
David C. Pack led the paid audience of The Restored Church of God in doing the Hokey Pokey on Tuesday, but he called it, “The Greatest Unending Story! (Part 384).”
Today is Tammuz 29 and Dave called an audible. After making Av 1 the “next big deal,” he then shifted things to come off of The Feast of Trumpets instead. Which then shifted the start of the Kingdom of God to Av 15. But now, Elul 15 is the real big deal to pivot from. When you subtract 45 days from Elul 15, you get to tonight at sunset. Yes, we are back to Av 1, folks.
I am not skilled enough to make the above explanation any easier. At least I did not take up 79 minutes of your day to do it.
Most people will not have read this article until after Dave has already started his next 24 hours of continuous failure. Take a deep breath and enjoy the moment. I am glad I did not remove the countdown from the website.
Elul 15 should be easy for everyone to remember because to the heathens, it is September 11, 2022.
@ 00:35 If this message had a one-word theme, it would be either “simple” or “simplicity.”
Which is it, Dave? He had plenty of time to just pick one and go with it to make the point. Instead, he waffles. So, who is supposed to make that call? Dave presents a one-word theme with options. In his attempt to make something simple, he even complicates that.
He must be so used to giving himself “an out” for when the inevitable failure happens, that his autonomic response is to not take a stand.
Some may think I nitpick by pointing out the seemingly mundane, but once you see Dave and the enablers with the proper light, you can spot noteworthy trends. Is this trivial? Or is the man broadcasting a consistent pattern of confusion and uncertainty?
@ 00:46 Could everything still somehow all be simpler, better, and sooner? Let’s see in this final message.
The angle that the picture is "better" than it was before is like saying that sheep shit is better than cow shit. The problem is that both are still shit. In fact, it is more enjoyable to step into either one than listen to another droning message of delusional fraud.
“Sooner” than May 15 or May 30 or June 5 or June 15 or June 30 or July 3 or July 14? Those dates are worth repeating every time Dave utters nonsense about “things being sooner than we thought” because it is flat-out, not true.
@ 07:03 So, a simple and powerful first kingdom would resolve every question we’ve ever had. All Mystery would be gone. And we would be able to correctly explain “10 evil days” not as starting this so that there's somehow 55 days to the 7-year kingdom but the 10 days close it and everything is 45 days. So on that alone, if we can prove it, it got a whole lot simpler.
Dave has discovered prophetic Silly Putty but calls it a kingdom.
He combs through parables and the prophets of the Old Testament to manufacture a malleable substance, which he then forces into any scenario he imagines. And it will always make the math work.
It is Silly Putty but with different colors to be combined. 45 days. 10 days. 3 ½ days. Even those have some “play” when needed.
If the shape is a square, no problem. Cram a “hidden” kingdom in there and suddenly it all works. If the shape is a star, same deal. Wow, it just fits. What a wonderful discovery in the nick of time.
Instead of the old ways of pounding a circle inside a triangle with a mallet, Dave now has this pliable amorphous kingdom period that can be shaped any way that is needed.
Rest assured, this type of kingdom business is going to have legs. Dave will use it from here on out.
@ 13:39 69 weeks of 7 years each, called a shabua, that’s a week, would have all of those 7 years, every single one of them, there’s no gaps, every single one of them would have started at Elul 15. Now, that’s a bombshell. By any stretch, it’s a bombshell. Our question would be, when the 70th week began, just because, you know, two thousand years passed, nearly, when the 70th week began would God change the date? Would the 70th week, which would be The Day of the Lord, change from what occurred for 483 years? That became the question. And it is it is the ultimate question right now. But you can’t get to that if you don’t have the 10 days fixed.
If you actually try to pay attention when you read that, ask yourself if you are ready to judge:
This message is A) Simple; or B) Simplicity.
@19:00 A full moon at The Day of the Lord fits much better than a new moon on Trumpets, were it The Day of the Lord. So, you’re seeing that things are better than we thought. Sooner than we thought.
There is that word “better” again. If he just keeps repeating it, perhaps it will manifest as reality. So far, I have been repeating, “Hot wife. Hot wife. Hot wife,” and yet, she has not knocked on my door.
It still does not appear that we have ventured into “better” territory. Different is not the same as better. Do you mean, better than proven failures? Better than broken theories? Better than nonsensical babblings?
Dave went on with more math, more calendars, and more moons.
He must have forgotten that he spent almost ten minutes a few weeks back explaining the “perfect math” proving that Tammuz was the final deal.
Perhaps the biblical scholars out there can fact-check this one:
@ 19:36 Well, that’s impossible to argue. It’s impossible that I can see to argue with the fact that Christ’s ministry began on Elul 15. And curiously, it looks like He disappeared for about 45 days right before that.
Matthew, Mark, and Luke all say, “40 days and 40 nights”—not 45. But when should you take what they say as the gospel truth? Dave conjured “five days of slop” to make his current theory fit. See, prophetic Silly Putty in action.
@ 20:12 …then He came back and He said, “My time is fulfilled.” Now, I’m not saying that’s exactly 45 days, but it’s within a day or so.
Curiously, sometimes Dave stresses how important exactness is. But other times, when that just will not work for his current line of thinking, it becomes A-OK to be approximate. Much like when the antecedent is all-important except in cases when it means nothing. Add or subtract. Multiply or divide. Do whatever you need to at the time and you are good to go.
Dave keeps getting boned by Habakkuk 3:2 and what that means.
@ 22:13 I had to admit I had it right a while back. I thought maybe it was Tammuz 1. But it’s still sort of “in the midst of the years.”
It takes a truly humble, mature man to admit when he is right.
Dave did a little more than just “thought maybe” about Tammuz 1. In Part 378, he pressured the brethren to send in their Common while holding over them the threat of losing their eternal life. That was no soft sell.
Thank God for those wicked serpents at the back of the hall who actually RECORD what Dave says.
Part 379 – June 25, 2022
@ 07:13 It is not possible, write it in your notes, it is not possible that “the month” the Bible talks about is anything other than the fourth month and Tammuz which is about 96 hours away.
Part 379 – June 25, 2022
@ 18:34 I believe that [Tammuz 1] no less certainly than I believe the seventh day is the Sabbath.
Is Dave now keeping Sunday? Are Ed and Dr. Viljoen wandering the hall with Sharpies making folks redact their notes?
I cannot figure out if this is lying or denial. I try to give him the benefit of the doubt, but I think Dave is cracking and it is becoming harder to hide that.
For those interested in revisiting his adamant push for Tammuz 1, read “Cancel Your Thursday Lunch Plans” written on June 26.
@ 28:33 But God knew there would be one more message and I could clear all of this up.
I knew. Dennis and Gary knew. Brad knew. Everyone else knew, Dave. Just like we all know this is not the last one. If I had any retirement left to place on a bet in Vegas, I would go all in. The days of your long-winded voice are far from over.
Dave cleared nothing up. He just reshuffled the deck after the cards were dealt.
@ 46:19 All of that becomes easy to understand. It’s an Elul event.
But not too long ago, Dave pointed this out.
Part 376 – June 13, 2022
@ 8:44 But you know, I’d watched us go from Sebat to Adar to Adar II to Abib to Iyar and then to Sivan.
Then to Tammuz. Then to Av. And now we are back to our old friend, Elul. But when you subtract 45 days from Elul 15, you land back on Av 1.
You do the Hokey Pokey and you turn yourself around…
It is Av 1. It is not Av 1. It is Av 1.
This reminds me of all that Elijah business. I am Elijah. I am not Elijah. I may be Elijah in the future. I have already been Elijah. I am not Elijah the Prophet.
If only this website was up and running at the time of the Ws. Folks in RCG five years ago remember that debacle. If anyone still has those handouts, I invite you to revisit that “simplicity in Christ” which has not stopped moving to this day. Instead of a W on a projector screen, it is now the Tammuz Cooking Table. How I miss that ugly green volleyball.
I wonder if this next point caused any alarm bells to sound off here in Wadsworth when Dave started to mess around with the Passover again. Is he laying the foundation for a future change?
@ 1:00:43 And He’ll drink wine again for the first time. Take the symbols. It’s a classic example. Now we know that Christ is gonna take the symbols of the bread and the wine in early September. God doesn’t use Holy Days. We would think I thought that would be around Passover sometime. Nope. Not at all.
Did he really say this? Listen for yourself.
@ 1:02:59 It has been my experience, and I’ll promise you I pastored more people than any other minister who ever lived, even thought about, it has been my experience that most people we think are God’s people are lying, unbelieving hypocrites.
The tone of his voice was uncharacteristically soft and full of humility. If you doubt, take a listen.
Okay, I was just kidding.
Dave explains that some folks (maybe me included) get to wait 45 days knowing they will be “burned alive with all the other unbelieving hypocrites who blew off God.”
Believe me, if "biblical" things began to happen, even when and how Dave said they would, I would drop to my knees in a heartbeat and plead with God. He would judge whether it was too late for me or not.
I tend to not sweat that idea too much right now because Dave keeps throwing plastic darts at a concrete board.
@ 1:10:58 Now, maybe we cannot know the day and the hour. If. If we know the day, it’s Thursday night. I’m not sure.
@ 1:14:46 So, could it be Thursday night, Friday night, at the end of the Sabbath into Saturday night? Or later? No matter, we wait.
Wow. This was spoken with such power and clarity that you cannot deny God is behind this. Except, God is not behind this.
He even continued into pondering the possibilities of Av 5 starting at sunset on Monday night or maybe all the way through Trumpets. At this point, why not just let everyone go home and say, “I don’t know folks. Sorry I bothered you.”
Okay, I laughed out loud when I heard this next quote:
@ 1:18:28 Because everyone who understands how simple things just became realizes there is nothing more for me to teach. The days of my voice have to be over. I have nothing else.
AMEN! If only that were true.
@ 1:18:48 It got so easy. So simple. It was hard to believe and yet God waited to the end to make it a signal that we had to be near the end. So, all I can tell you is this man “prepares the way” right before the Father and Christ coming when He’s still a messenger of the covenant, he “rushes to call it out,” I don’t know how I’d be rushing if we got a two-week wait. Or a ten-day wait or even a seven-day wait.
@ 1:19:18 It’s not gonna go another year. The Mystery’s over. I “give a ration” and then “he watches.” And he seems to pretty much know when it is ‘cause he “tells the house” and they’re “found watching” with “their lights on” as though they know the day. If I know the day, if it’s exact, we have two days to go.
If Dave was not all throughout the pages of your Bible when he paraphrases so many verses that apply to himself in a continuous stream, then those comments would appear to be insane.
This was delivered on Tuesday, July 26. Tonight at sundown is the beginning of Av 1.
Wait for it…
@ 1:19:49 The series is over.
He said this with dramatic thumps on the table meaning, “for realsies this time.”
Is this for real? Let me consult the Magic 8 Ball website.
Marc Cebrian
See: The RCG Simpleton
32 comments:
That's a huge ear cone Dave is wearing on his head. And I know why! He doesn't actually wantt to use it to improve his hearing or he'd hear what people really think of his end times buffoonery.
I left RCG in late 2020, after being a member for 12 years due to the prophesy series.
It is scary that around 18 months have passed and nothing has changed with the way David Pack is doing this. He's definitely sounding like a broken record STILL. I was thinking surely something must have changed by now. NO...
Thanks Marc for helping to make people aware of this, if they are willing to listen.
We shouldn't be surprised, the bible warns about false teachers many times.
Verse list:
2Ti 2:16 KJV But shun profane and vain babblings: for they will increase unto more ungodliness.
I wonder if the excitement in Dave's audience is like when people get all wound up at a Pentecostal meeting and they all start hollering, slain in the spirit, some jumping up and down falling rolling on the floor shouting hallelujah Amen etc etc. He keeps saying"I'm not sure" and as I've said before that is the name of the hero in the movie Idiocracy. Maybe that big cone on his head is an echo chamber and all he can hear is his own prophetic babbling. That would put him in Babylon. Come out of her my people!
Having access to Dave's sermons I have to say that it is a most unpleasant experience. While God may not be the author of confusion, and thus, Dave's sermons are merely scriptural debris in his mind that he poorly organizes into an incoherent mess, Dave Pack is indeed the author of his own confusion. When listening to this and other sermons, all I can come up with is "What the hell are you talking about?"
The man is sick and, as Dave might say, "I don't think I've ever quite seen..., maybe once 20 years ago, but I..." have known a man who claims to be a pastor/theologian as F'd up as Dave.
I have visited many a delusional religious zealot/fanatic in my day in WCG, in mental institutions. The only difference between the kind of conversation I might have had with one in the hospital and Dave not in a hospital is Dave still gets to wear a suit, live in a nice home hidden away behind a security gate to which he still has the key and can come and go as he pleases. Dave's mental and emotional deterioration is increasingly more obvious and his theological meanderings and dithering more convoluted, ridiculous and delusional.
The other "leaders" you have called out Marc, need to face their worst fears that they must have rolling around in their minds after these sermons, falsely so called, and invoke the 25th Amendment on Dave. They need to pull his plug before it is too late for everyone still gyrating in their seats, few thought they might be.
It might not be the easy-peasy thing to do but compared to what's coming from Dave as he fails and fails and proves over and over he is no more a theologian or pastor than Pinocchio, save for Dave's longer nose, it will soon be obviously necessary.
Dave's demise would be sad were it not so ludicrous and drawn out without him being called into any kind of accountability by his fake ministry.
simpler, better, and sooner?
Dave did indeed deliver to the membership exactly that message. Unfortunately, it is a stark revelation of exactly where Dave Pack's mind is and has been.
Dave could not function if he was prevented from using the word impossible (not possible) and the phrase; "that is the ultimate question". I guess you could throw in the word "we" as well.
This long drawn out affair to correctly identify and predict the complete gospel has always been an effort by Dave to answer the ultimate question(s), then to create the impossibility of the ultimate answer not delaying coming to fruition in a matter of day(s), and then proclaim it was a simpler and better outcome than what WE previously believed.
That is the simple definition of Dave Pack in his present state and a short summary of his working method. Is the membership getting anything better than they previously had? No, unless they believe the excitement of something new is always better. Is the membership getting anything sooner than what they have been promised for the last 7 years? No, not even in their minds could they think they have gotten anything sooner.
We are soon into the dog days of August (Av) or the dog days of summer - Wadsworth geographically. This is what Wikipedia has to say about this time: The dog days or dog days of summer are the hot, sultry days of summer. They were historically the period following the heliacal rising of the star system Sirius, which Hellenistic astrology connected with heat, drought, sudden thunderstorms, lethargy, fever, mad dogs, and bad luck.
That may be the only things "better" and "sooner" that the RCG membership get during the dog days of Av.
Reading Pack's nonsense makes my head hurt! I can't imagine how much aspirin the remaining RCG members must consume to tolerate this malarkey!
One cannot make sense out of nonsense. His proclamations are just insane ramblings. Pure madness at its best. Someone needs to be institutionalized and provided strong medication. Please stop this madness ....
*Calling out Marc Cebrian*
Marc, Dave Pack has gotten into your head, you are at the precipice of a great falling away.
I am referring to your dreams of hoping for a hot wife to knock on your door and your fascination with silly putty and you happily walking through cow sheet and last but not least, inquring about the future with your magic 8 ball.
Marc, you need to get a hold of yourself buddy. Your rapid decent is obvious. I am here to help you Marc!
I have simpler, better and sooner solutions to all your problems. Marc, if it has been a number of years since a hot chick has knocked on your door, there is a simple solution for that. You need a new door Marc. Get rid of the 1950's Herbert Armstrong approved door and get modern. Women will overlook a boring house, but it better have a fancy door.
As for the silly Putty, Marc you need to transition into JB Weld fast cure putty. This stuff is fantastic, you get the putty experience and then it is all over and fully cured in 10 minutes. This is knowledge you are going to need because you will break your hot wife's expensive glassware or pottery and being able to putty it back together before she knows is a big plus.
Marc, you need to think bigger picture than just going for a leisurely walk through cow sheet. My dad's fraternity prank was that he was required in 1958 to board a bus and travel 200 miles to the Cleveland Zoo animal elephant enclosure, sneak in and scoop up a big elephant pie, put it in a bag and return to college on the bus. That is big Marc, but even if your hobby is local, bringing home the bull's gold will be something the hot wife will appreciate for her 1000 square foot garden.
Marc, ditch the magic 8 ball. The local Wadsworth tarrot card reader would be a more appropriate venue to inquire about the future. And who knows, she might be pretty hot and just in case, have a picture of your new front door at the ready in your wallet - you never know.
Well Marc, I wish you the best on your road to a simpler, better and sooner recovery.
For many of these COG gurus, the attraction is apparently "knowing when the Second Coming" is.
As a Christian, I have to ask , what good is that? Are you somehow suppose to "be better" and "more Christian" than you normally are if the Second Coming is next week?
Shouldn't a Christian be concerned about exemplifying Christ at all times, and let the cards fall where they may in regards to when the Second Coming is? Knowing or not knowing is really of no concern at all, and what will be , will be.
Its all rather pragmatic in the end, however the COG has always made hobby of and overly interested in things that we have little to no control over. This includes elections, conspiracies, places of safety, British Israelism and many more. Whether you know these things or not , has little influence or purpose on how you live your day to day life. It is really an odd form of gnosticism and achieves nothing.
Calling Out Whattabout: That's about as stupid a post as we have seen in a long time
9:44 AM,I've been saying the Packster has been needing a trip to the funny farm for months now. Sadly, until he does something dangerous, there's nothing anyone can do, expect wait or pray.
@ 1:02:59 “It has been my experience, and I’ll promise you I pastored more people than any other minister who ever lived, even thought about, it has been my experience that most people we think are God’s people are lying, unbelieving hypocrites.” -- DCP
It has been my experience that Gerald Flurry and David Pack, who passed themselves off as prophets, are lying, thieving perverts. They are the worst false prophets around today and a couple of the most unbelievable hypocrites ever.
“Curiously, sometimes Dave stresses how important exactness is. But other times, when that just will not work for his current line of thinking, it becomes A-OK to be approximate.” -- MC
This reminds me of the early days of the Restored Church when Dave Pack said that his Real Truth magazine was going to bring responsible understanding rather than reckless speculation. This sounded so wonderful.
Unfortunately, over time, Dave became much less responsible and much more speculative, until today he is such a godless mess that I am ashamed of him.
If you use people in the Bible as examples of how to act and how not to act you could go to 1 Kings 18:28 -29 and find that Elijah mocked the prophets of Baal. He asked them if their god was real he must be talking to someone else and not hear them or he could be out hunting prey or he's gone on a long journey or maybe he's even asleep and you need to wake him up. But they continued for hours to cry out and cut themselves until the blood gushed out of their bodies and whatever other kind of strange rites they performed. I think mocking is a very appropriate way to call out a false apostle who blasphemes God by saying he speaks in God's authority but continually lies.
What About The Truth said: “ Marc, Dave Pack has gotten into your head, you are at the precipice of a great falling away.”
This was the dumbest thing I’ve read here in a while. You need to lay off the drugs for a while!
Deut 28:28 NASB: The Lord will strike you (Dave?) with insanity, blindness, and with confusion of mind......
As Dave mental illness clearly escalates, his cognitive dissonance is showing more and more. He states something as fact and then says the polar opposite a minute later. Again, I ask where are the loving, merciful Christians he is supposedly surrounded by? Where are his ministers of mercy when they are needed most? Where is Mrs. Pack in the midst of this obvious crisis her husband is having? I know many don't want family to be mentioned here and normally I would totally agree. But this is not normal by any stretch of the imagination. How is ignoring this problem, hoping it will go away or take care of itself helping? How is that the behavior of a genuine Christian?
The silence from all involved in this nightmare in Wadsworth is deafening and very telling. I personally don't know of any "true Christians" who would stand by and let this continue. They would risk whatever it might cost them to get this man help before something truly tragic happens.
Thanks Marc for keeping us up to date about the restored church of God. Before you, it was covered but not regularly and not the way you do it
You have my thanks
Charlatan: a person falsely claiming to have a special knowledge or skill; a fraud.
synonyms: quack, sham, fraud, fake, impostor, pretender, masquerader, cheat, deceiver, double-crosser, trickster, cheater, swindler, fraudster, rogue, villain, scoundrel, phoney, shark, con man, con artist, hustler, fimflam man, bunco artist, shicer.
You forgot the "most important" synonym: Dave Pack! His picture is is right there in the dictionary, alongside the definition..
It has gotten really bad, so bad that Davie C has resorted to attacking Marc C using the pseudonym of: "WHAT ABOUT THE TRUTH".
Yes it seems that Davie C has resorted to attacking our reveler of truth Marc C because the "Charlatan in Chief" can't handle the truth! Ironic isn't it. His post is moronic just like his false proclamations of impending doom are.
Stand firm Marc, the "Charlatan in Chief" has been exposed for who and what he is.
I'll make it easy for you Dave. Christ was born on the 1st Day of the Feast of Tabernacles. Died on Passover. Will return on the Feast of Trumpets.
With all the insanity and stupidity flowing from Wadsworth, are members fleeing the Compound?
Mark WolfeFriday, July 29, 2022 at 1:35:00 PM PDT
I'll make it easy for you Dave. Christ was born on the 1st Day of the Feast of Tabernacles. Died on Passover. Will return on the Feast of Trumpets.
Everything you say is wrong. The Messiah did not die on Passover…He died on the preparation day of the Passover….Aviv 14….try again rookie
Or, Jesus returns the last day - John 6:39,40,44,54 - of the feast - John 7:37, which feast day is the 7th, not the 8th. ???
Mark Wolfe said...
I'll make it easy for you Dave. Christ was born on the 1st Day of the Feast of Tabernacles. Died on Passover. Will return on the Feast of Trumpets.
==========================
lol, that's all I got...
Mr. Diehl wrote: "Calling Out Whattabout: That's about as stupid a post as we have seen in a long time"
Thank you very much for the compliment. Mr. Diehl, I have always revered your intelligence, common sense and perception. I am honored that you came to the conclusion that you did. Of course you saw all along how stupid it was to take Marc's comments highlighting Dave Pack's ludicrous conclusion and creating a parallel parody was. I hope with the stakes as high as they are now in the RCG with this being the final message, that you found my conclusions of simpler, better and sooner in my comment at least equal to what Dave Pack just dumped upon the membership this Tuesday night.
Obviously you read the opening of my comment and understood immediately the parallel of Dave Pack calling out Marc Cebrian, myself and all ex RCGers in the audio clip. After all, we are all living a wretched life caught up in all kinds of sin - all lying unbelieving hypocrites, forsaking ourselves from assembling with the man of doctrinal precision and expert prophetic insight.
I am glad that we can both conclude that simpler, better and sooner can be all of stupid and ludicrous and at the same time.
P.S. Mr. Diehl,
You are normally very good at spelling, but it looks like you messed up my moniker. I have found if you slow down a little and watch that spell-check (it has a mind of its own), it does help.
WHAT ABOUT THE TRUTH
God Is coming back and he will judge the ministry in RCG! God is not going to come back any day that Dave says he will, It's Impossible! If I were still in RCG I would be very concerned about what God warned his sheep and the ministry about? Apparently Dave thinks God gives him and his ministry a free pass when they lie and threaten former members because they are offended. I hope they are offended, it's the least of their worries. I dare Dave and any members stupid enough to still be attending and tithing to what has become the Synagogue of Satan to find any fault with any member with God's spirit that would not put up with the abominations falling out of his mouth! Dave is full of vanity just like Satan is! God will have the final say... God Help Them all when that day comes!
Charlatan ...
Best leave the satire to Marc. Yours makes about as much sense as Dave's prophecies.
Marc,
Congratulations on breaking free from Pack but the damage he has done to you is now bivouac to all of those here at Banned…now that you are free from his spell may I recommend professional counseling to help you totally recover..??
Just a marine your in the room with the Psychologist and he asks you “Is David Pack in the room with us now..??” You would clearly say no….but then you would confess that Pack is still living rent free inside of your mind…I think it would be very healing for you….
Poor Dave! As he looks around, there is just no harmonizing of today's dire national and global events with HWA's prophecy mold. So, he is left to prattle on helplessly and aimlessly, as if suffering from general paresis.
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