Saturday, June 8, 2013

Dave Pack: I will Be Shutting Down All The Phoney COG "Colleges" and "Universities"

Those kids at UCG, LCG and PCG "colleges" and "universities" had better beware.  You will soon be attending the most amazing COG college ever to exist in the woods of Wadsworth where you will be taught by the worlds most incredible man who sits beside Jesus Christ on his throne.

Most will not admit this, but the academic institutions in the splinters are basically 80% world and 20% Ambassador College—classic mixtures of knowledge coming from the tree of good and evil. These phony colleges will soon come to an end, but many of their students will want to continue, knowing that the true Ambassador spirit and way is now available to them. No longer will there be competing educational programs, teaching truth and error to students. Separate resources currently being invested in multiple “colleges” will soon be combined into one. Ambassador Center, the modern true continuation of Ambassador College, will come to more closely mirror its predecessor in size and function, the latter largely being already the case. Combining elements of the Pasadena, Big Sandy and Bricket Wood campuses in their prime, “AC” will continue to teach men and women how to live, but also how to make a living. Only the numbers of students and qualified, experienced faculty (some from the past) will grow. Candidates for the ministry and Headquarters staff will acquire a foundation for success through academics, clubs and extracurricular activities. The old college motto of “Recapturing True Values” will be further established.


Head Usher said...

Dammit, Pack just won't shut up, will he? And every time he opens his stupid mouth, something stupid comes out of it. Right now, he keeps on coming up with different ways to say the same stupid shit.

Okay, I thought he had covered prettymuch every aspect of 24/7 church life that won't be duplicated when the saints come marching home to wadsworth, but he keeps coming up with new ones. This time it's phoney Armstrongist institutes. I suppose he's got a phoney Armstrongist institute too. Sure, great, shut them down, Dave. The world doesn't even need one phoney Armstrongist institute, not even yours. What's your next excuse to harp on the same stupid "when the saints come marching home to wadsworth" song? You're like a guitar with only one string left. They're never coming btw.

Anonymous said...

Did all the boys own a brown suit, back in the day, or were they supplied by the studio wardrobe department?